


Kiss From A Rose

by mybeanieandme, radadusta



Series: Roses In Bloom [1]
Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Badly timed touring, Brief mentionings of past Harry/OC, Inaccurate understandings of LA and award shows, M/M, Manager Liam, Model Harry, Model Zayn, Mpreg, Mpreg Harry, No Hurt all Comfort, Rock Star Louis, Rock Star Niall, Sex in later chapters
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-07
Updated: 2015-06-17
Packaged: 2018-03-29 12:31:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 48,887
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3896416
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mybeanieandme/pseuds/mybeanieandme, https://archiveofourown.org/users/radadusta/pseuds/radadusta
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Louis hadn’t meant to tell Niall about his massive crush on Harry Styles. But alcohol and proximity to the model in question had forced his hand. It was years ago at a bar, before their first world tour. Their single hit number one, resulting in an invitation to perform at a runway show where it seemed fated they would meet. Harry was the most beautiful person Louis had ever seen and their brief interaction had been possibly the best minute and thirty seconds of his life.</p><p>[Louis’s in a rock band called No Control, Harry’s a pregnant model suffering from a broken heart. They've both got meddling friends.]</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. A Graying Tower Alone On The Sea

**Author's Note:**

  * Translation into Русский available: [Kiss From A Rose](https://archiveofourown.org/works/4980394) by [malishka1011](https://archiveofourown.org/users/malishka1011/pseuds/malishka1011)



> The whole story is written and is being beta'd in parts. Should update once every other week or so (fingers crossed.)

The sun shone in through the French doors that the interior designer had insisted Louis needed in his bedroom. It had seemed like a good idea at the time, with the lovely large balcony and expansive city view from his posh rock-star condo. But on mornings like this, when his head was throbbing and phone wouldn’t stop buzzing, he regretted everything.

The headache wasn’t the same as a hangover. There wasn’t the lingering taste of dead cat in his mouth or the overwhelming, body-numbing dehydration. No, this was closer to the frustration of having to deal with people who are drunk when you are completely sober for the length of an entire evening.  Louis’s band had just announced it’s third world tour and had decided to celebrate in their usual fashion with a raging party at Funky Buddha’s sister club in LA (location as per the request of their manager, Liam Payne.) Louis spent most of his festive party evening keeping Niall from making an arse of himself with the waitress that he fancied.

His phone buzzed again announcing a seventeenth straight text message from Niall. The screen was already full of messages along the lines of “Bruh he crica yah” and other equally unintelligible things. But the newer ones where Niall had woken up not hungover (the bastard)- were short declarative sentences. “CONGRATS MATE!!” “He’s all yours now.” “Can’t wait for you to have babies.”

Louis did not have the wherewithal to deal with whatever it was that Niall was talking about. So he rolled over, pulling the covers over his head, and went back to sleep.

__

Harry was fairly certain he was drowning. It could have been the heartache or the actual physical tears that were rolling down his face, and had been for the past twelve hours, in which he did not sleep, but he felt like just giving in to the feeling.

There was a knock at the door that he simply ignored, like his cell phone, and the landline he’d unplugged so no one could reach him. He didn’t want to be reached. He just wanted to sit and cry. But the knock persisted for solid ten minutes and Harry’s sadness turned into anger as he pulled himself off the floor and out of the corner he’d wedged himself in between the bed and the wall. He winced, gripping his lower back. His usual back pain exacerbated by the cramped position on top of his now extra weight-

He had to navigate the maze he’d made the night before when he’d started throwing everything he could find of his boy- of his ex-boyfriend’s into a pile. Somewhere around 2 AM it started to make sense to light the stack on fire but then Harry had found a photo of him and grief had overwhelmed him and he’d gone back to crying.

Zayn was on the other side of the door, holding two huge grocery sacks full of what Harry hoped was ice cream- and pickles. 

 

“Hey, Haz,” Zayn cooed softly, placing the bags on the banquet beside the door. He wrapped his lengthy arms around the taller man, carefully avoiding his tummy, and gingerly kissed his forehead. Harry let himself be surrounded by Zayn as much as he could physically manage. Over Harry’s shoulder Zayn took in the mess that Harry had made, expensive suits and clothes and furniture scattered and out of place.

Zayn guided him to the sofa and wrapped him in a blanket before hurriedly putting the groceries away. He joined Harry with a banana, knife, and a tub of nutella placed artfully on a plate. “When was the last time you ate, babe?” he asked, setting the food on the table.

Harry simply shrugged in reply, body suddenly feeling incredibly tired. “Dunno,” he added, voice rough from disuse and crying. He hiccupped into another wail, “Does it matter?”

“It matters to me, Haz,” Zayn hugged him closer, rocking him gently. “Matters to your baby.”

Harry’s eyes widened at that and he pulled away from Zayn to reach for the banana. He opened it with shaking fingers.

“That’s it,” Zayn smiled. “Everything will be alright.” He rubbed Harry’s back as Harry leaned into him, dipping the banana straight into the hazelnut spread.

\--

It was 11:00AM before Louis decided to actually wake up.  He popped and stretched as he physically rolled out of bed and made his way to the kitchen. Headache now gone, he turned on the TV as he headed over to his cereal cupboard. He selected Cocoa Puffs and Frosted Flakes, mixing the two lazily and looking for the milk as the TV droned on. The cherry cabinets, stainless steel appliances, and marble counter tops of his kitchen seemed like ornate decorations and expensive places to keep his staple diet of take-out and cereal.

He moved to sit on his giant extra-comfy leather sofa, propping his feet up on the coffee table, grinning to himself as no one could tell him off for doing so. He brought a spoonful of cereal to his mouth and vaguely tuned into the vapid entertainment talk show the TV was set to.

“-super model Harry Styles,” the woman on the TV started and Louis nearly spit a mouthful of milk onto the screen. He reached for the remote and turned up the volume.

“Sources close to the couple say they broke up late yesterday evening after radio and tv personality Damien Smith was caught in a compromising situation at the Hilton with another man. The super model, who announced his pregnancy publically four months ago, hasn’t been seen since the breakup while Damien Smith seems to have taken up residence at the Four Seasons getting chummier with his new male friend.” Louis set his bowl down and searched frantically for his phone before remembering he left it on his bedside table.

He ran to his bedroom and rang Niall. “WHAT. THE. HELL,” he bellowed.

“Haha,” Niall cackled, “You’ve heard the news then?”

“No thanks to you, you arse,” Louis said scathingly, “A dozen cryptic messages? Christ! You should have said straight out.”

“This is way more fun,” Niall responded with another laugh.

“You’re exhausting,” Louis huffed.

He hadn’t meant to tell Niall about his massive crush on Harry Styles. But alcohol and proximity to the model in question had forced his hand. It was years ago at a bar, before their first world tour. Their single hit number one, resulting in an invitation to perform at a runway show where it seemed fated they would meet. Harry was the most beautiful person Louis had ever seen and their brief interaction had been possibly the best minute and thirty seconds of his life. Or so Louis had foolishly declared to Niall at the bar later that night. Both Louis’s and Harry’s careers had skyrocketed since the show and Louis felt silly holding onto that feeling. He’d watched Harry’s career with keen interest, which was relatively easy as his humanitarian work and private life were near daily paparazzi fodder.

“You going to call him?” Niall asked.

Louis scoffed. “And how would I do that?”

“You’re a famous rock star- have your people call his people,” Niall said, like it was obvious.

Louis rolled his eyes. “He doesn’t know me, Niall. It’s creepy and wrong. And I’m sure he’s absolutely gutted. His long-term boyfriend just cheated on him while he’s pregnant with their baby!”

That gave Niall pause. “It does sound pretty bad when you say it like that,” Niall admitted.

“Yeah,” Louis said.

“But you could be his knight in shining armor!” Niall persisted.

“SO exhausting!” Louis reiterated.

“Oh- and Louis?” Niall started.

 “What is it now?” Louis rubbed his temples with his fingers.

“We’re nominated for a Grammy,” Niall cackled and hung up.

“WHAT?!” Louis yelled into the receiver to nothing but the dial tone.

__

A week later Harry was cradling the phone between his shoulder and his ear as he polished off a pint of rocky road.

“I just don’t know, Z,” Harry fiddled with the drawstring on his pants before sighing into another bite of ice cream. “The tickets aren’t mine.”

“Doesn’t matter,” Harry could hear Zayn shake his head, “You’ve got every right to them. They’re at your place and you should go. You deserve to get out of the house, strut your stuff. Show off your expensive insured legs.”

Harry giggled. God, he hadn’t giggled in ages. Maybe it would be nice to get out of the house. He did deserve it, darn it! If- if he-who-must-not-be-named could be out there flaunting his arm candy then Harry could be out there strutting his stuff.

He rubbed his hand across his tummy, hand spread wide to feel any potential kicks. He wondered if any of his suits still fit.

“Want to be my date for the Grammys?” Harry proposed.

“I’d love to!” Zayn laughed.

__

Louis was actually nervous on the red carpet. He and his band had not only been nominated, but they’d been invited to perform and it was making him jittery. Half way down the carpet all four of them had been pulled into an interview with some online fashion/gossip magazine and the reporter wanted to know who they were wearing. Josh, Dan, and Niall were talking animatedly about how Burberry had sent Niall the wrong size jacket for their last award show. Then their dates were called into question, Josh and Dan had brought their girlfriends, Niall had brought his mom.

“I brought Niall’s mom as well,” Louis nodded.

Niall threw his head back and laughed, “You know, ol’ Tommo. Too many dates to choose from.”

The reporter agreed at once. Louis had a reputation for sleeping around and at one point in his career it had been well earned. However, Niall knew as much as Louis did that it was no longer true. Once Louis’d won his long fought battle with their management his sleeping around was just for keeping up appearances.

“Are you and Leigh-Ann still seeing each other?” the reporter ventured.

Leigh-Ann and Louis had never been seeing each other. They’d seen each other twice. The first was by accident, in the cereal aisle at the grocery store. Louis’d mentioned, half-joking, that they could maybe collaborate on a song. But a week later there was a call for him to set up a meeting with her and her people. The second time they’d met they'd discovered they did not work well together, musically or otherwise. They’d parted amicably- and their goodbye had been caught in photographs and the world was abuzz with Louis and his new girlfriend.

“Leigh-Ann and I are just friends,” Louis assured the reporter.

“Right,” the reporter responded with a wink.

Louis was preparing a rebuttal when everyone’s attention was suddenly drawn away.

It wasn’t uncommon at award shows to have reporters distracted by people who were more famous than you. Louis did not particularly care who it was, he was just thankful to not have to answer any more questions about women he’d even had a meaningful conversation with.

Niall pinched his side. “LOOK!” His voice was a harsh whisper and Louis glared as his eyes went up and-

Harry was here. He was here at the Grammy’s.

“Shit,” Louis groaned and Niall laughed, their exchange drowned out by the bedlam of clicking cameras.

 __

“I’m not sure this is such a good idea,” Harry frowned, peering out the tinted car windows as they pulled up. He readjusted the pants Yves Saint Laurent had specially tailored for him to fit around his extremely pregnant belly.

“I’m absolutely sure it's a wonderful idea,” Zayn told him. “We don’t have to talk to anyone about anything and if we’re forced into conversation we’ll just tell everyone how lovely YSL is.”

“I can do that,” Harry breathed.

“This is the perfect venue, babe,” Zayn kissed his forehead, reaching for the door handle. “It’s all about music and we love music. You can tell everyone how much you love that Meghan Trainor song.”

“That booty-booty,” Harry smiled lopsided at him.

“That’s my, Haz,” Zayn grinned.

And then they were out of the car and were being blinded by flashing lights.

Zayn immediately took hold of Harry’s elbow firmly, never letting go, guiding him along the line of people.

Harry envied how effortlessly beautiful Zayn looked in his slim black suit, his hair coiffed up with just one stray piece just so. Harry felt like a balloon stuffed into an expensive suit and hat.

“You look amazing,” Zayn assured him, “we’re going to be the envy of everyone here.”

Harry snapped into action, adopting his model face. Zayn knew just what to say even when he wasn’t feeling up to the challenge.

They’d met in the lobby of a talent agency.  Harry had just started in the mailroom and Zayn had just been signed to his first contract with Levi’s.

“You’re on the wrong floor, mate, with a face like that,” Zayn had said to him, as if one Levi’s contract made him the authority.

“I’m sorry,” Harry hadn't wanted to be on the wrong floor of anything- it was his first day!

“I just mean you could model,” Zayn had said, taking a step towards Harry to examine him more closely.

Harry had blushed and shrugged and adjusted his thick-framed glasses. “’m not beautiful enough to model- not enough confidence either,” he’d told Zayn.

“Nonsense,” Zayn smiled. “You’re very beautiful and as for the confidence- it’s just a matter of walking into a room and knowing you’re the envy of everyone else.”

Zayn had sounded like such a ponce then but the more Harry got to know him the more he came to know that it was a mental thing. Something Zayn said to himself to put his “game face” on even during the toughest of shoots.

So now it was time for a game-face. They walked the red carpet like the models that they were, making small talk with reporters as they went, telling the same anecdote about Harry’s outfit and Zayn’s hair.

Harry actually found himself genuinely smiling. He was overwhelmingly pleased when they finally made it to their seats, where he could relax against Zayn’s shoulder and Zayn could squeeze his knee reassuringly.

__

Twenty minutes into the show and Louis had to piss. It was the four cups of tea he’d made himself that morning coming back to bite him in the ass.

“Stop, fidgeting, man,” Josh told him.

Louis just flipped him off and stood up right in the middle of Taylor Swift’s acceptance speech.

He ran to the toilets, which were unsurprisingly empty, this early in the show. Quickly relieving himself, he went to wash his hands, and adjust his hair before running back to his seat.

Louis turned away from the sink and immediately ran into someone. “Jeez, I’m so sorry-,” he said, reflexively grabbing to stabilize the other person.

“It’s all my fault,” Harry- _Christ it was Harry fucking Styles_ \- replied, adjusting his broad brimmed black hat. He looked at where Louis had grabbed his arm. “Thank you for-.” He started and Louis gripped harder before letting go all together.

“Sorry- again about-,” Louis said, forcing his hands to his sides.

“It’s really my fault,” Harry told him, brushing his curls nervously behind his ear. They stood looking at one another for a moment before Harry seemed to come to himself.

“Oh- I’m- Harry-,” Harry started.

“Styles, I know,” Louis nodded, and shook Harry’s offered hand. “I’m Louis-.”

“Tomlinson,” Harry finished for him. “I know.” His face flushed slightly and Louis couldn’t help but grin.

“Oh, you do, do you?” he smiled, tilting his head.

Harry nodded lightly. “I saw you were nominated tonight! Congratulations.”

“Me and the boys,” Louis grinned cheekily, nodding. “And you-,” he gestured to Harry. “I heard you were expecting. Congratulations to you. I know how much you love kids.” After it came out of his mouth he realized how creepy and stalker-like that sounded. Harry blinked owlishly for a moment.

“I just mean- I know you like helping those children's charities in-,” Louis could not believe how flustered he was. 

Harry smiled broadly, pleased to be recognized for such a thing. He was incredibly proud of his charity work but the tabloids only grazed that stuff to talk about his torrid love life.

“Thank you, Louis,” Harry said genuinely. “Can I be completely honest with you?”

“Sure,” Louis nodded quickly- too quickly. He had to keep it together. But it was difficult because Harry was just so- Harry. Less lanky than when they had first met and he’d gained some muscle in the thighs that were wrapped in tight trousers that were probably specially made to fit around his glorious tummy. Louis clenched his hands tighter in an effort not to touch him.

“I’m terrified,” Harry said quietly, like a secret. “And,” he added, “I’m as big as a house.” His lip quivered and his eyes went glossy. He’d been doing so well holding it together but here, in the gentleman’s bathroom, in front of a famous rock star, he was going to absolutely lose it.

He felt Louis’s hand on his lower back, gentle and reassuring. “You look absolutely radiant, Harry.” His voice was so sincere Harry wanted to cry more, but for a different reason.

“Shut up,” he said instead, shaking his head.

“But you do,” Louis assured him. “Me on the other hand,” he exhaled dramatically and stuck out his gut, “too many Nandos trips with Niall.”

Harry grimaced. He was thankful that even with all his crazy cravings he hadn’t dipped into fast food. “I don’t know how you can eat that.”

Louis shrugged. “It’s either that or cereal. I’m a rubbish chef.”

Harry giggled, “that’s terrible!” You need someone to make you an actual meal.”

Louis smiled broadly at Harry’s laugh and his heart felt lighter than air. “You offering to cook for me?” It was an easy flirt.

Harry laughed again. “Well- maybe? I don’t know.” The question seemed to take him by surprise. Like he couldn’t possibly understand why anyone would want to hang out with him while he was like this. Outside of Zayn, obviously, who was bound to him for life.

“It’s nice to hear you laugh,” Louis told him, giving him an out. “You’ve got a great laugh, H.”

“It feels good to laugh.” Harry had nearly forgotten how to.  These past few weeks had been- just exhausting.

“Listen- I know this is a bit forward,” Louis’s mouth seemed to have a mind of its own at this point. “But I’d like to give you my number.”

Harry looked so incredibly confused that Louis wasn't sure-  but he reached for his phone all the same and handed it to Louis.

“If you need anything-,” Louis started to say as he put his number in Harry’s phone but didn’t know where to go with that thought. “Even just to pull the media vultures off you for a few days,” he said. “I’ve been known to cause quite the scene.”

Louis hoped that Harry didn’t know about the famous scenes he’d caused. Broken amplifiers, destroyed hotel rooms, and fistfights- mostly fistfights- were, unfortunately, associated quite closely with Louis. It fit the rock and roll life-style that his management emphasized and in the early years it was fine. Louis was in the closet and he was angry- about a lot of things. But as he got older and was finally allowed to come out (as bisexual- which- yeah right) it had become an act. Everything was a show for the cameras and it was starting to get trying.

He handed Harry’s phone back. “I also give a wicked good shoulder massage,” he said.

Which- shit. He really hadn’t meant to say that. But Harry just started giggling- which. Phew.

“Thanks, Lou,” Harry said and Louis wasn’t sure what he was thanking him for specifically.

“Anytime, curly,” Louis grinned. “I should probably- get back,” he gestured to the door.

“Right!” Harry’s face registered genuine surprise, like he’d forgotten where they were. “You’ve got an award to win.”

Louis blushed slightly, moving past Harry to get to the door. “Fingers crossed.”

Harry nodded.

“Oh- and Harry,” Louis gripped Harry’s sleeve again, eyes not leaving Harry’s arm. “He’s an arse for cheating and leaving. And- he’s an idiot to think he can find better than you, because there isn’t.”

He pushed the door open, without meeting Harry’s gaze, leaving him completely bewildered in the bathroom.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading. We've been working for months now, giddy with anticipation to share this story with everyone. 
> 
> It's our very first written collaboration. I'd like to thank Radadusta for being an endless source of inspiration and infectious enthusiasm. Hopefully this will be the first of many collaborations to come. 
> 
> I'd also like to thank Akikotree for beta'ing and letting me read most of this story to you while it was in progress. You mean so very much to me <3
> 
> -MyBeanie&Me


	2. A Growing Addiction I Can't Deny

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harry and Louis exchange goods for services.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There is texting in this chapter :D Louis is bolded and Harry is italicized.

Harry woke up the next day from a dream that felt so familiar it was like a memory. It was the very first high-fashion runway show he’d ever done- Yves Saint Laurent’s fall collection. He was there again and he could remember his nerves but he was himself in the dream- just as pregnant as ever. And- Louis- Louis was there. Louis and his band No Control. They were practicing a song backstage like they were supposed to be performing next which was the silly part about dreams, Harry supposed. A runway show to open a rock concert? He shook his head.

Clearly, his mind was still buzzing from his encounter in the bathroom and it had stumbled into his dreams. On the car ride home the evening before it had taken everything in Zayn’s power to get him to stop going on and on about how fit and sweet Louis was.

“His jacket, Zayn,” Harry had said.

“Yeah I heard you,” Zayn cut him off, “tailored just for his tiny waist,” he and Harry said in unison.

“Yeah- all right,” Harry rolled his eyes and rubbed his temples. “I’m being annoying, I get it.” He worried his bottom lip between his teeth and cast his eyes down. “He probably was just being nice is all. Because of-,” he gestured down to his tummy.

Zayn had shrugged. “Seems weird to hit on a pregnant person.”

“He wasn’t hitting on me,” Harry frowned.

Zayn raised an eyebrow at Harry.

“Am I not worth hitting on?” Harry said and his eyes welled up. “I’m not. That’s why Damien left me.”

Zayn wrapped his arms around Harry immediately. “Damien left you because he’s an arse,” he told Harry with a kiss to the back of his head. “I’m sure Louis was hitting on you, I just **...** ”

“What?” Harry looked up at Zayn with red-rimmed eyes.

“Well,” Zayn exhaled, “Like- I don’t know the guy, yeah? But he’s got a reputation of sleeping with anything that has a pulse.”

“Oh,” Harry said plainly.

“Yeah- so,” Zayn shrugged. “I just want you to be careful is all, H.” He added softly **,** “Like I want you to get back out there, when you’re ready of course, I just want you to be careful- not that you’re not. Just- I just don’t want to see you so sad, babe.”

Harry had nestled into Zayn and when they’d gotten home Zayn had brought him upstairs and tucked him in.

A few days later, the encounter with Louis pushed aside, Harry wastired of wallowing and being at home. The Grammys had been a good venture outside but he wasn’t sure he was ready for more. Worse, his entire back felt like it was on fire. Pain shot from his shoulders to his lower back and no matter how long he sat in the bath or with a heating pad he couldn’t shake it.

He curled up on the sofa, unsure of what to do with himself, and watched the Barefoot Contessa. It was the episode when she packed her husband a picnic- which let’s be honest- is every episode. Harry reached a hand to rub one of his shoulders and Louis’s words suddenly came back to him. “I give a mean shoulder rub,” **…** Louis’s legs in those pants and the blue of his eyes **...**  Harry’s phone suddenly felt like it was burning a hole in his pocket so he took it out and opened his contacts to Louis’s number.

_About that shoulder massage…_

__

“No no no,” Niall shook his head, turning to face their drummer mid guitar stroke. His hand came up to ruffle his hair as his frustration grew. “It’s goes TA-tsk-tsk-tat-TA-tsk,” he corrected Josh.

“You want to get over here and do it then?” Josh spat back, holding his drumsticks threateningly.

“Lads-,” Louis held up his arms and adopted what Niall referred to as his “older-brother” tone. “Let’s take fifteen and come back fresh. Or else we’ll be never be invited back to Brussels.” He tried to smile but the other three merely glared at him, walking off all the same.

“Practice is impossible today,” Niall sighed setting down his guitar.

“It’s all jetlag anyway. We’ve just got a few days of promo left, yeah?” Louis shrugged. “Then a few weeks off and then we’re on tour.”

“If I want to go on tour with any of you arseholes,” Niall scowled.

Louis stared blankly. “When was the last time you ate?”

Niall’s eyes went wide, genuine confusion and concern flooding his face. “Oh my god. I don’t remember.” He shot up immediately and went about collecting a plate of food from a nearby craft table.

Louis laughed and shook his head **,** reaching into his bag for his phone.

He had a few texts from Liam, one from Phoebe, and one from an unknown number.

_About that shoulder massage…_

Louis’s heart started pounding in his chest, blood rushing through his ears. He’d given up hope that Harry would text him pretty much as soon as he’d left the bathroom at the Grammys. Sure- he might have told Niall everything that evening and then had a very guilty wank thinking about Harry’s rosy lips. (He didn’t remember them looking that soft.) But he’d been so forward and awkward and weird and Harry was wonderful and there was no way he’d ever text a fuck up like Louis.

But he had- or- maybe it wasn’t him and Louis had offered a shoulder massage to some random stranger he didn’t remember **...**

No. It had to be Harry.

**Offer still stands.Or sits. Or lays down. However you’d like to be positioned when the shoulder massage occurs.**

He hit send and immediately regretted it. Why couldn’t he have just stopped at “Offer still stands” or have thought of something cooler to say.

_Ooo. Sitting please. xx_

Harry didn’t seem to mind the awkwardness or he was taking it in stride.

_Or however my back can handle it at the time it occurs :((((_

Louis suddenlywanted tolearn how to give deep tissue massages and become a masseuse, anything to help Harry.

**Back been giving you troubles? I’m sorry, babe.**

_Comes with the territory I guess. Hope it’s worth it._

**I’m sure it will be.**

Niall was staring at Louis with a mouth full of sandwich **. “** Why are you smiling like an idiot more so than usual?”

“Sod off,” Louis shot back.

_Cheers._

_How about a shoulder massage in exchange for dinner? Give yourself a break from Nandos._

“Holy shit your face is gonna break in half, mate,” Niall laughed.

“NIALL,” Louis growled.

**Love to. Unfortunately I’m in Belgium for promo work. Won’t be back til Friday.**

Or Louis could quit the band and fly back right now.

_So you’re free Saturday?_

**Absolutely.**

_k. text me when you’re back in town xx_

Louis’s grin was threatening to break his face. Holy shit holy shit. He was going to have dinner with Harry Fucking Styles.

He tucked his phone back into his bag, unable to help his smile.

“Louis’s got a boyfriend,” Niall teased.

“Has he?” Josh’s mood immediately perked up.

“Oooo,” Dan added.

“Children, the lot of you,” Louis rolled his eyes.

They teased him relentlessly until the show recorded later that evening. He would have been angrier about it but it gave them something to unite behind that didn’t involve murdering each other like they almost had that morning. Louis could take one for the team- and he hoped that secretly- maybe **...**

Liam arrived at the studio twenty minutes before the show was scheduled to record. His texts to Louis had gone unanswered and he hoped that meant they were practicing hard and hadn’t killed each other.

Liam’s phone rang in the middle of the set, announcing his presence to everyone around. The band presented him with uniform scowls.

“What do we say about phones during practice boys?” Louis prompted.

“Silent or off,” they sing-songed.

“What’s the punishment-?” Louis started but Liam gave him a firm glance and held up a stern pointer finger. His eyes flashed to the screen. It was an unknown number with an American area code he only recognized because he lived there. He immediately turned out of the building. Everyone he knew in LA knew he was here.

“Payne,” he said into the receiver.

“Hello,” the voice said, sounding a bit confused like he might have dialed the wrong number. “I’m trying to get a hold of Niall- Horan?”

“This is his manager speaking, what’s this in regards to,” Liam asked, trying not to sigh. What had Niall- or more specifically Niall AND Louis done now?

“He’s not done anything wrong,” the voice laughed, “It’s a personal question I’d like to ask him directly.”

“I’m sorry- who is this? How did you get this number?” Liam grimaced.

“My assistant got it from your assistant,” the voice said evenly but it still sounded like a question. Maybe everything in this guy’s life was a question. “I was hoping we could collaborate on a project.”

__

Harry had phoned Zayn as soon as he’d sent his last text to Louis. He was babbling excitedly and through the phone it sounded like happy squawking.

“Babe,” Zayn said calmly. “Slow down, you’re talking a mile a minute.”

“Sorry,” Harry said. “Sorry. _”_ He squealed _, “_ I’ve been texting a boy!”

“A legal boy I hope,” Zayn let out a startled laugh.

“Of course a legal boy,” Harry scoffed. “He’s a man actually. A sexy man.”

“Does his name start with an _L_ and end in an _ouis_?” Zayn ventured.

“ _Oui_ , it does,” Harry giggled at his own terrible pun and he could almost feel Zayn roll his eyes. But he couldn’t sense Zayn’s tentative smile. It was good Harry wasn’t wallowing.

 “So you’re serious about starting something with him- whatever it is?” Zayn asked.

“He’s just coming over to massage me and I’m cooking him dinner,” Harry stated.

“Massage you?” Zayn said.

“He offered to rub my shoulders,” Harry reminded him and then added, “You never offer to rub my shoulders.”

“No, because I just do it anyway,” Zayn sighed.

“He’s in Belgium right now,” Harry told Zayn.

“Who? Louis?” Zayn asked.

“Yeah, Louis,” Harry said like it was obvious. “But I’ll be seeing him Saturday.”

“All right,” Zayn said. That gave him some time.

“All right?” Harry clarified.

“Yeah, H, I’m proud of you,” and then Harry could hear the smile.

__

For the rest of the time they were in Europe Louis had little time to think about Harry and their upcoming non-date-date. He’d thought to ask the next day for a clarification but Harry had said to text when he was back in town and he wasn’t back in town yet.

No Control were either recording variety interview shows, practicing for their performances on said shows, or asleep in their hotel rooms.

It was the same old routine except for the fact that Niall- well Niall had been furiously texting someone since that show in Brussels. Liam had returned with a funny look on his face after his phone call and he’d pulled Niall to the side and texted him something.

“Everything all right?” Louis asked as Niall pulled his guitar back on.

“Yeah,” Niall flashed a grin, “better than.”

And they let it drop because they had things to do.

Louiswas determined to get the information out of him on the very long flight home. The very very long flight home.

__

It was 9:08 PM and Harry was elbow deep in a bag of tortilla chips and halfway through a container of organic guacamole when Louis texted him again.

**Guess whose back.**

_Slim Shady?_

Harry wasn’t entirely sure where that response came from but it was going to be incredibly awkward if Louis didn’t-.

**Haha. You never struck me as an Eminem fan, Curly.**

_We all have our secrets._

It wasn’t really a secret he supposed but god he was hopelessly endeared by Louis. There was a pregnant pause as he waited for Louis to respond, unsure if he should bring up tomorrow.

**We still on for tomorrow?**

Louis saved him from himself.

_Course. Any allergies or food restrictions I should know about?_

**None, thanks tho. You’ve got a lot of yuppie LA friends, haven’t you?**

_So what if I do?_

**No offense meant. You’re just conscientious. I appreciate it. Why don’t you text me a time and your address?**

There was a moment of hesitation.

**If- you still want me to come over after that asshole remark.**

Harry rolled his eyes.

_Course I do._

And he sent off his information, placing his phone on his belly beside the guacamole and sighing deeply.

__

Niall was lazing about on Louis’s bed as Louis frantically changed outfits in his cavernous closet.

“You’re a wreck,” Niall laughed jovially.

Louis sighed and leaned against his closet door. “I’ve just got nothing to wear.”

“You’ve got an entire Topman shop in there,” Niall rested back against the pillows, phone buzzing on his stomach.

“How do you know what I have in here?” Louis glanced over to try to see who Niall was texting.

“You’ve had the same wardrobe for years, mate,” Niall snatched his phone away just in time for Louis to not see anything.

Louis scowled **. “** Further proof that I have nothing to wear then.” He crossed his arms, staring hopelessly at his closet.

“It wasn’t like this before when you were pulling- you’d just put your “fuck-me” outfit on and go,” Niall tilted his head, flipping his phone in his hand.

“This isn’t like before,” Louis said quietly. “I want him to like me- Ni. Genuinely like me for me.”

Niall hopped off the bed and wrapped a scrawny arm around his friend. “You’re in deep.”

“I know,” Louis leaned into Niall. “I know.”

__

Harry had made an effort to dress up for the evening. Long floral top and the tightest jeans he could manage. He’d pulled his hair back into a bun he hoped looked more sexy-touseled than thrown-together. It was the first time since the award show that he’d felt the need to impress anyone. Damien’s stuff was no longer there and he’d scrubbed the apartment as best he could- and he’d hired someone to help with the spots he couldn’t reach. It was the start of a new beginning and the new beginning involved fajitas and virgin margaritas.

The doorbell rang at exactly half past six and Harry took a deep breath before answering the door.

Louis looked stunning in sinfully tight black skinnies, low swoop neck shirt and a blazer jacket. His chest tattoos peaked out perfectly- not that Harry was paying them any special attention. He certainly hadn’t googled Louis and taken note of them and then wondered how many tattoos Louis had. It was a welcome distraction from his lack of modeling jobs and public scrutiny. Louis was holding what appeared to be a full grocery sack.

“Come in,” Harry squeaked. He cleared his throat and waved Louis in. “I hope- you know I said I’d cook.” Harry looked at the bag.

“You did,” Louis smiled, “and it smells wonderful in here.” His eyes finally followed Harry’s and he started. “These- are,” he looked a bit sheepish. “Presents.”

“Presents?” Harry furrowed his brows **.** He walked back into the kitchen and beckoned Louis to follow, which Louis did **,** setting the bag on the counter.

“We were traveling loads so I didn’t have proper time to look for things- but I wanted to bring you something- as a thank you for cooking- and something for- the baby- you know,” Louis shrugged as he tried to figure out what he was saying. “Like I’m sure you’ll have a posh baby shower and I wasn’t sure if we’d still-,” he stopped himself. “So I bought a bear at the airport in Brussels,” he pulled out the small brown bear. It was wearing an “I Heart Brussels” t-shirt and had a Belgian flag stitched to his foot. “And as it turns out every major city we flew into after had brother bears for the little guy,” he pulled out three more teddies in similar outfits representing three more major cities and corresponding country flags.

“You brought me bears?” Harry’s voice was a bit shaky. Louis finally looked up from the stuffed animals he’d arranged on the counter just so.

“I did,” Louis offered him a small smile, hoping that was okay. Needing it to be okay.

Harry enveloped him in a hug, kissing both his cheeks before scooping up the bears. “They’re wonderful, Louis, thank you,” he held them closer, squeezing them tightly before putting them back on the counter.  His eye caught what was left in the bag and his eyebrow quirked up. “Lou?” Harry asked.

Louis fished the bottle of oil out of the back. “Massage oil,” Louis said, reading the label. “It’s minty- I hope that’s all right. I asked the woman at the counter to make sure it was non-toxic and safe for the baby- not that I’m rubbing it anywhere near- that- area but just- I know that skin is a giant organ,” he shut himself up, offering the bottle of oil to Harry.

Harry took it without looking at it, staring at Louis like he was some sort of enigma.

“You were very serious about this shoulder rub,” he said finally and Louis nodded.

“I’m an all-in kinda guy,” Louis told him. And there was a weight to his words that Harry didn’t miss.

Harry smiled at that. “After dinner, then,” he nodded.

“Dinner- right!” Louis turned to the stove. “Are you making fajitas?”

“Best you’ll find in Southern California, I promise,” Harry grinned and nodded.

“Thems is fighting words, Styles,” Louis laughed. “Bring it on.”

__

They ate until they were stuffed to the brim, making each other laugh until margarita nearly came out of Louis’s nose.

“So- Niall is your best friend in the band?” Harry asked as Louis got up to wash the dishes. “You know you really don’t have to-,” he gestured to the sink.

“You cooked, I’ll clean,” Louis brushed him off and ran water over the sponge. “And yes. Well- Niall’s me best mate in or out of the band. We’ve been friends for ages. He knows everything about me- even things I’m sure he wisheshe didn’t know.”

Harry laughed at that. “That’s Zayn for me,” Harry chuckled. “He’s been keeping me in a steady supply of chunky monkey since- ” He went incredibly quiet and shook his head, “but no. We’re not going to talk about that.”

Having stacked the last pan in the drying rack, Louis turned to Harry throwing the dishtowel over his shoulder. “You know we can- if you want,” he offered.

He was the picture of domesticity, leaning on Harry’s counter, face a bit flush from the heat of their meal. He’d claimed it wasn’t too spicy but Harry could sort of tell it had been from the way his eyes watered and the excessive amount of guacamole he’d tried to douse the heat in.

Harry shook his head firmly. “He’s not worth talking about. Especially not to attractive men who so graciously wash all your dirty dishes,” Harry smiled.

Louis looked around a bit. “I don’t know who this attractive guy is but I promise his massage oil is not as minty as mine,” Louis put a wet hand on his chest defensively. “Speaking of,” he snatched up the bottle.

Harry’s eyes lit up, “Yes, please.” He grabbed Louis’s hand and pulled him into the living room. Since Damien had left the place had become a bit more feminine, Harry selecting floral print pillows to put on the dark leather sofa. There were colorful votives to match and Harry was acquiring the number of someone to redo the dark drapes. He hadn’t noticed really until just nowand he felt himself holding his breath as he waited for Louis'sreaction.

Louis stopped a few feet from the sofa taking it all in. “This is so much homier than my place,” he said finally. Harry didn’t know what he'd been expecting but that wasn’t it.

“Homier?” he repeated, turning to face Louis.

“Yeah,” Louis grinned, seemingly embarrassed. “I’m hardly home but it’s all very industrial and- like you know that sticker on the outside of the microwave they tell you to take off before you use it?” Harry nodded. “I still haven’t taken it off and I’ve had the place for a year and a half.”

Harry laughed loudly which made Louis smile more. The initial tension was gone and he started fiddling with the buttons on his floral print shirt that tented out over his belly.

Louis’s eyes went wide as he watched Harry’s fingers.He put a hand over his eyes.“Sorry- I-,” Louis said.

Harry cleared his throat and Louis peaked between his fingers at him.

“It’s silly because I’ve been nearly naked in front of a camera,” Harry started and Louis knew. He’s seen almost every ad Harry’d ever done (not that he googled them or kept close tabs or anything.) Harry’s Prada underwear shoot had been Louis’s computer desktop for an embarrassing amount of time.

“It’s just- I’ve not been shirtless in front of anyone but Zayn and Damien since-,” he gestured down and then put his hands at his sides.

“Since what?” Louis played dumb.

Harry scoffed. “Since I got pregnant,” he stamped his foot indignantly and Louis’s heart melted.

 “You’re pregnant under there?!” Louis tried to keep a straight face but couldn’t. He started laugh and tried to stop. “I’m sorry, love. I don’t-,” he straightened up. “I don’t mean to be cruel.” He turned his back so Harry could take his shirt off.

“I can just rub your shoulders through your shirt- or if you want to get a towel- or,” he shrugged and his voice got soft. “I’m the oldest of seven kids,” he told Harry, still not facing him. “I’ve seen my pregnant mother shirtless more times than I’d like. I’m sure you’d be a welcome change.”

Louis could hear the fabric of Harry’s shirt slide off his shoulders and saw a pillow move out of his periphery. “You can turn around now,” Harry told him.

So Louis did. He wished he’d been better prepared for a shirtless Harry. Even with a pillow hugged to his chest to cover the top of the swell of his belly, he was expanses of milky skin with- a few tattoos littered about that Louis didn’t even know he had. They were smaller- easily covered with makeup Louis supposed.

 “You look stunning,” Louis said a bit breathlessly.

Harry flushed a bit. “You’re just saying that,” Harry said, but his grip on the pillow lessened.

“Why don’t you sit? And I’ll get to work?” Louis grinned. Harry sat, pillow still covering his belly. Louis opened the bottle of oil and immediately regretted it, glancing from it to the sofa.

“Um- Harry,” he tried to keep the distress out of his voice.

“Yes, Louis?” Harry answered.

“Do you have any bath towels?” Louis asked and that made Harry turn round. He saw Louis’s hands were already coated but it looked accidental- like he’d spilled half the bottle as he removed the small plastic cap.

Harry chuckled a little, standing up and trotting off to the bathroom, his pillow covering completely forgotten. He returned a few moments later, handing Louis one towel and draping another over the back of the sofa. “To protect the leather,” he explained.

“Good thinking,” Louis murmured, and his eyes were glued to the top of Harry’s stomach where a very pregnant looking butterfly sat. It was much larger than Harry’s other tattoos.

Harry sat, listening to Louis warm up the oil between his hands. “I’m going to touch you now,” Louis said.

“All right,” Harry nodded.

Louis **'** s hands were smaller than his own but seemingly more muscular as they kneaded into the meat of his shoulders with meticulous movements. Harry supposed the dexterity came from years of playing instruments. He was about to ask Louis if that was the case but they both started talking at the same time.

“Did-,” Louis started.

“How m-,” Harry asked.

“You first,” Louis conceded, rubbing his hands soothingly across the tops of Harry’s shoulder blades.

Harry moaned a bit, eyelashes fluttering. Louis wasn’t kidding, he was really good at this.

“Um-,” he tried to find himself as Louis’s hands stilled. “How many instruments do you play?” he asked and Louis’s hands resumed.

“One,” Louis chuckled, “well- one really well and then two I pretend to play. I’m okay at the guitar if I really have to be but.”

“Keyboard?” Harry said.

“Yeah,” Louis said, unable to hide the surprise in his voice.

“I might have watched a few of your videos,” Harry offered by way of explanation.

“Oh might’ve you now, curly?” Louis teased, tugging gently at a curl that peaked out of Harry’s bun.

“Maybe,” Harry flushed and Louis could see it in his shoulders. “Your turn to ask your question.” He changed the subject.

“My question,” Louis let him, “was more of a statement. You’re quite the rebel with your tattoos, Mr. Styles.”

Harry’s hands moved to cover his butterfly immediately, but Louis reached a gentle touch to brush them away. He’d moved closer to Harry’s ear in order to reach and his breath was warm on Harry’s neck.

“I like them. They’re very you.” Louis pulled back to continue his work on Harry’s shoulders.

“Thank you,” Harry said softly.

“If you budge up a bit I can work lower,” Louis offered and Harry did so immediately, sitting up straighter and sliding away slightly from the back of the couch, not wanting the feelings of Louis’s hands on his skin to stop.

“Do the G and A mean anything?”

“It’s my sister and mum,” Harry muffled a groan into his hand as Louis worked on a particularly bad knot.

“Hm,” Louis said.

“What?” Harry asked.

“I’ve not gotten any tattoos for my sisters,” he saidlike he was both shocked and ashamed at himself.

“Well it sounds like you’ve got a few- unless your six siblings are mostly boys,” Harry offered.

“Naw, all girls but little Ernie,” Louis told him. His voice was so fond Harry wanted to pull Louis over the sofa and hug him.

“You like kids then?” Harry ventured.

“Love ‘em,” Louis said immediately, hands reaching as low as they’d go- as low as he dared. He laughed a little to himself.

“What?” Harry asked laughing along.

“It’s probably silly-,” Louis said.

“Tell me please,” Harry pressed.

“Well,” Louis caved easily, “When we moved the band from England to here- I- I totally bought into that American dream business. House with a yard and a fence and a dog- and a wife and _a_ kids.”

Harry stilled at the word wife.

“But now-,” Louis seemed to be talking to himself.

“Now?” Harry asked.

“Well between my publicist and yours,” Louis joked. “I’m definitely not bisexual,” he said quite meaningfully. “And I travel so much it’s hard to find anyone who wants to deal with that and- ” He let his voice drop off.

“And?” Harry pressed.

“Well- I don’t know if you know this about me,” Louis’s delicate fingers slid down the curve of Harry’s shoulders. “But I’ve got quite the colorful reputation when it comes to relationships.” He stopped himself from saying “slut”. He started kneading again. “And whether it’s true or not- nobody wants to be with that.”

There was a beat where Harry didn’t move. He felt like he should say something but he didn’t know what to say.

“I think I’m done,” Louis said and he ran the towel down Harry’s back in an effort to pick up any excess oil.

“Thank you,” Harry said, reaching for Louis’s hand.

“You’re very welcome. It was my pleasure,” Louis said giving his fingers a squeeze. “Thank you for dinner.” Harry felt the faint brush of lips on the top of his head before Louis pulled away.

“I should probably get going,” Louis said.

“Oh,” Harry was startled out of some sort of reverie where Louis would never leave and they could eat guacamole forever. “Yeah- it’s,” he checked his watch. 11:04 PM. “It’s late.” He was surprised by how quickly time had gone by.

Louis chuckled. “It is.”

Harry stood up and grabbed his shirt, slipping it on over his shoulders but not bothering with the buttons. He reached for the bottle of oil as Louis made his way over to the door.

“Don’t forget-,” he said.

Louis almost took the bottle but didn’t. “You keep it- for future shoulder rubs,” Louis said.

“Well you’ll be the only one rubbing my shoulders with it,” Harry informed him.

“I better come over again to use it then,” Louis said.

“You better,” Harry told him.

“Well all right,” Louis couldn’t help his smile. He opened the door and turned back to face Harry, moving closer into his space before pulling away, look ashamed of himself.

“I’m sorry,” he said.

“Why?” Harry asked, frowning so deeply he looked like an adorable dejected frog.

“I was about to kiss you,” Louis said, fiddling with the doorknob. “I want to kiss you.”

“Is that so bad?” Harry asked and for once his hormones didn’t drown him in self doubt. Louis had been here at his place for ages harboring a desire to kiss him.

Louis made a noise that Harry didn’t understand.

“What?” Harry asked, self doubt creeping in.

Louis looked up at him. “You just got out of a long-term relationship-,” he started and sighed. “With the father of your kid- I’m just- this- I don’t want to rush or push you into anything.” Aside from the fact that it was never stated that this was a date-date. 

“You mean too much to me,” he said, finally, quickly and in one breath.

Harry looked at him with wide eyes and then smiled at him with his whole face. He reached for Louis’s hand. “That’s very thoughtful of you,” Harry laced their fingers. “But I’d like a kiss if that’s all right.”

“Yeah,” Louis nodded, looking at Harry’s lips and not looking away. “All right.”

It was a tentative kiss, just soft brushing of lips but it made Louis’s body feel like a live wire. He clenched his free hand into a fist as he fought the urge to pull Harry against him and kiss the breath out of him.

Harry deepened the kiss, leaning into Louis’s space, lips parting slightly as he held Louis’s hands tighter. It ended with a few soft slow touches of lips and with a final squeeze of Louis’s fingers before Harry dropped his hand and pulled back.

His lips were extra rosy, face flush, and grin wide. He leaned on the door, fingers grazing the knob again.

“Text me so I know you make it home safe,” Harry said.

“I will,” Louis said a bit breathlessly, unable to keep the brilliant grin off his face.

“Goodnight, Harry.”

“Goodnight, Louis.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm going to tentatively say this fic will consistently update once a week. Ros and I can be reached at [rosketch](http://rosketch.tumblr.com) and [mybeanieandme](http://mybeanieandme.tumblr.com) on tumblr respectively for comments, questions, and concerns (Ros might also have some adorable drawings inspired by the fic over there.)
> 
> Thank you for all the lovely comments and kudos and sweet encouraging messages :'3
> 
> -MyBeanie&Me


	3. The Light On The Dark Side Of Me Part 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things become more official and Louis makes it to band practice on-time for once in his life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More texting.  
> Harry's italics, Louis's bold. 
> 
> Mature warnings: Unprotected oral sex
> 
> (A note about the title. This is the first half of what was originally written as chapter 3. Chapter 3 turned out to be about 25k so it's being beta'd in bits so it can be more readily posted.)

Harry felt like he was on cloud nine when Louis left, giddy and light and like he was a teenager again. He called Zayn almost immediately.

“Waz?” Zayn’s sleepy voice answered on the third ring.

“Zayn!” Harry said loudly.

“Harry? Is everything okay?” Zayn immediatelysounded more awake. “Did Louis do something? Is it the baby?”

“Everything is perfect,” Harry said gently. “More than perfect, Zee.” He giggled to himself and heard an exasperated Zayn sigh on the other end of the line.

“I’m happy for you,” Zayn told him and it sounded like he’d closed his eyes and rested back in bed, voice muffled into the pillow.

“I’m going to invite him over again,” Harry whispered to a sleepy Zayn.

“Mmph,” Zayn answered as a reply.

Harry listened to him sleep for a few minutes before he said, “Goodnight, sleepy Zee.”

__

Louis was so beside himself he could barely sleep. He’d kissed Harry Styles. Actually kissed him- on the lips. And better yet, Harry had kissed him back. God his lips were just as soft as they looked and so sweet and Louis could die now that all his dreams had come true.

The next morning he was less groggy than he thought he’d be. He lay in bed for longer was than necessary, not wishing to visit his cereal cupboard again. He was pleasantly surprised by a text from Harry.

_Did I ever tell you I also make the best scrambled eggs in all of Southern California?_

**That you’re definitely going to have to prove.**

_How quickly can you get here?_

**Twenty minutes if I don’t shower :P**

_Just enough time for your toast to burn._

**I’m on my way.**

Louis didn’t know if Harry was magic or perfect or perfectly magical. He slipped into clean clothes, threwa beanie on over his unruly hair, brushed his teeth, and popped in his contact lenses before rushing out the door and to Harry’s place.

__

Harry threw another orange in the juicer for good measure; there was no such thing as too much orange juice.

There was a knock at the door and Harry glanced down to double check his outfit. He was wearing the extra large tunic shirt he slept in, his thin robe and his I Heart Cat pants that singer Ed Sheeran had given him for his 21st birthday. A flash of fear crept in his belly. Maybe he should have dressed up. Maybe he shouldn’t have even texted Louis. Weren’t there rules about texting a guy too soon after the first date? Was it too late to ask Zayn about such rules? Zayn would definitely tell him rules like that were stupid and honesty was the way to go.

He supposed it was too late anyway. He padded over to the door inhaling deeply before opening it.

Louis looked like he definitely hadn’t showered, soft fringe poking out from under a hat. Harry wanted to run his fingers through the caramel colored spikes that framed his face. Louis's hands were shoved into thepockets of an oversized Adidas hoodie with an athletic pant to match the theme. He looked like he could spend the day lounging about the house and Harry wanted him to. Specifically his house.

“Morning,” Louis smiled, the expression causing his eyes to crinkle. God, Harry was doomed.

“Good morning,” Harry smiled, tucking a stray hair behind his ear, other hand idling over doorknob. “Please, come in.”

“Thanks, curly,” Louis stepped in, toeing off his shoes and inhaling deeply. “Does your apartment always smell amazing? Is that bacon?”

“Mm-hm,” Harry confirmed with a nod, whichever question he was answering didn’t seem to matter.

Neither of them seemed to be overly keen on heading too quickly into the kitchen, even with as many things as Harry had on the stove. There was something about that hallway, like they were both remembering the kiss they’d shared. Louis took a step towards Harry and Harry froze.

“Do I have permission to kiss you?” Louis asked gently, giving Harry just enough space.

Harry smiled at him and nodded. “I hereby grant you permission to kiss me whenever you wish throughout the rest of the day.”

“Just today?” Louis clarified as he leaned in for a kiss.

“Just today,” Harry confirmed as their lips met. It was gentle and lingering and ended with a “hmm” from Harry. “You’re on a trial period.” He explained with an eyebrow waggle.

“I’ll have to be on my best behavior then,” Louis grinned. Half of him was incredibly giddy, and the other half was worried that he’d fail and Harry would move on from him.

Harry reached for Louis’s hand and pulled him into the kitchen to finish making them breakfast.

A mound of perfectly seasoned fluffy eggs, two pieces of whole grain toast each, and as much bacon as Louis could eat and then some. It was by far the most delicious breakfast Louis had had in what felt like an epoch.

He leaned back in his bar-chair and patted his contented tummy. “My compliments to the chef. You weren't lying. Those were by far the best eggs I’ve had in Southern California.”

Harry beamed. "Told you.”

Louis leaned towards him, looking like he was going in for a kiss, but he pulled away at the last second, pulling Harry’s empty plate with him.

“Cheeky,” Harry accused in a flustered tone.

“You like it,” Louis called as he moved the dirty dishes to the sink.

Harry giggled as Louis ran the water and pushed up his sleeves.

“You know if you keep doing the dishes I’m never going to let you leave,” Harry said when half of the dishes were in the drying rack.

“Here’s hoping,” Louis grinned at him over his shoulder.

And that’s how the next couple of days went, with Louis spending far more hours at Harry’s place than his own, returning only in the late evening to sleep in his own bed. They fell into an easy pattern of stories and soft touches, just enjoying the closeness of another person.

__

Louis’s fourth consecutive day visiting Harry’s found them curled up on the sofa with sundaes watching a marathon of _Law and Order SVU_ , Harry hiding behind Louis at the scariest parts.

Louis’s phone buzzed announcing a call from Liam. Louis frowned down at his phone.

“What’s wrong, babe?” Harry asked as Louis pulled away slightly.

Louis’s heart skipped at the pet-name. “Just my manager,” Louis told him. “I’ve got to answer it in case-.” He started but Harry waved away an explanation.

“It’s work, I understand completely,” Harry told him. Louis grinned at that and leaned back in to kiss him quickly as a thank you for understanding.

“Should I go in the other room?” Louis asked.

“I’d prefer you didn’t,” Harry told him, “you’re far too warm to let go of.”

Louis narrowed his eyes. “I knew you only wanted me for my body.”

They chatted so long the call went to voicemail. Louis raised an eyebrow as Liam called almost immediately again.

“Li,” he answered.

“Where are you?” Liam asked exasperatedly.

“Why?” Louis asked, brain racing with what tabloid stories could be saying about him being dead in a dumpster or worse.

“Because you aren’t home,” Liam explained with withering patience.

“Oh- no,” Louis chuckled. “I’m not home. Why? Are you at my home?”

Harry giggled as Louis rolled his eyes at Liam before he crossed them and grinned like a dork.

“Are you with someone?” Liam asked quickly.

“Maaaybe,” Louis answered.

“Louis William Tomlinson,” Liam exclaimed. “You tell me where you are right now.”

“It’s none of your business where I am, mum,” Louis replied evenly. He wasn’t sure what he and Harry were to each other, if they had a label for whatever it was. Louis was fairly certain even if they did label it he wasn’t ready to share. He’d waited to have Harry for so long and he wanted him a little bit longer all to himself in this secret bubble they’d cultivated.

“Don’t sass me, Louis. No one’s seen you for days and we’re worried,” Liam said. There was that slight panic in his voice, a leftover from the days when Louis would go on a bender and would be found by a group of paparazzi the next morning asleep on a trashcan.

“I’m sorry, Li,” Louis said gently. “I didn’t mean to worry you.”

“Niall says he’s barely heard from you!” Liam continued. He was on a rant now and Louis couldn’t stop him no matter what. “Says you’ve been avoiding him and when you do talk it’s short sentences. Please tell me it’s not something illegal or dangerous.”

Louis glanced from Harry to the television and then to the ice cream bowls they were holding in their laps above the blanket beneath which sat their tangle of legs. This was possibly the furthest thing from illegal or dangerous Louis could think of. “I promise it’s neither,” Louis said. He didn’t extrapolate and Liam sighed heavily.

“I don’t suppose you’re going to tell me what you’re up to then,” Liam said.

“I will- when I’m ready to,” Louis promised.

There was a beat in which neither of them said anything.

“Listen- Louis,” Liam sounded hesitant.

“What, Liam?” Louis asked.

“You’re not- you’re not thinking about quitting the band are you?” Liam managed.

“HA!” Louis snorted in surprise and dissolved into laughter. “No,” he chuckled. “No, Liam.” He assured him. “I promise. Nothing illegal or dangerous and I am definitely not quitting the band. I just- I’m finding a bit of peace before the tour is all.”

Liam made a noise Louis didn’t quite understand. “You know how questionable that sounds, Louis?”

“Yeah,” Louis nodded although Liam couldn’t see him. He glanced to Harry, “You just have to trust me, please. I promise it’s all good things.”

“All right,” Liam exhaled harshly. “I’ll trust you.”

“Thank you, Li,” Louis said.

“Just keep me in the loop- if there's anything I need to know- so I can have your back,” Liam said.

“I will,” Louis told him. “And thank you, Li.”

“For what?” Liam barked a laugh.

“For having my back,” Louis told him.

“Yeah, yeah,” Liam sighed, “Bye, idiot.”

“Bye, numb-nuts,” Louis chuckled and hung up the phone.

“Numb-nuts?” Harry looked perplexed at the end of the conversation.

“Li and I go way back,” Louis offered as explanation.

“Sure,” Harry chuckled.

“He’s just wondering where I am is all,” Louis explained, nestling back into the sofa.

“Oh,” Harry sounded as if he'd suddenly realized how much of Louis’s time he’d been monopolizing. “Oh my gosh!” He sat up away from Louis.

“What happened?” Louis looked down immediately for ice cream spills or- something. “Is the baby okay?”

“You’ve been wasting your time here with me,” Harry said quickly.

“Wasting?” Louis furrowed his brows.

“You’re some- huge rock star about to go on tour and you’re- sitting on my couch eating strawberry ice cream,” Harry said it like it was the worst thing in the world. “You should be- out and about- or rehearsing or doing things with your friends.” He motioned with his ice cream bowl.

Louis gave him an easy smile, pulling Harry back in close. “You’re very sweet,” he kissed Harry’s forehead. “But you are giving me far too much credit.”

“Hm?” Harry asked as he accepted Louis’s snuggles, leaning back into him.

“First of all, I’m not a huge rock star,” Louis said, “I’m just- a regular level- rock star.”

Harry giggled.

“Second of all, I love strawberry ice cream,” Louis said, mock insulted on behalf of the ice cream. “Third of all. I don’t want to be out. Touring is a lot of out and about,” he paused to recall which number he was on. “Fourth of all- rehearsals start next week. Fifth of all- other than Niall- I have very few friends in LA. If I’m including you-,” he glanced to Harry to make sure that was okay and Harry nodded that it was, “then I’m up to- TWO whole friends and Liam in the area that I’d actually want to hang out with.”

“Oh,” Harry said quietly. “So what you’re telling me then is that you’ve been using me because you’re bored.” He sighed sarcastically.

Louis nodded. “You’ve found me out.”

Harry nuzzled into him and giggled before his voice turned serious. “I like having you here.”

“I like being here, curly,” Louis kissed the top of his head just as Ice T announced who the murderer was.

__

Friday evening, taco remnants having been cleaned up after their food fight in the kitchen, Louis found himself once again in the living room rubbing Harry’s shoulders.

“I could get used to this,” Harry sighed contently as Louis really dug into the meat of his shoulder.

“Please get used to this,” Louis answered quietly, smiling against the back of Harry’s hair.

There was a weight to his words Harry wasn’t sure he was supposed to read into. “I wonder why you’re so good at this, anyway,” his voice was challenging as he distinctly changed the subject.

“I learned it in Japan,” Louis told him.

“Seriously?” Harry looked back so quickly he nearly hit his head against Louis’s chin.

“Not really,” Louis chuckled, rubbing his palms into the bottom of Harry’s shoulder blades. “This kind of training comes from being present the many many times my mum was pregnant.”

“Hm,” Harry smiled to himself. “You’re going to be such a good dad one day,” he murmured.

“Yeah?” Louis asked, hope so thick in his voice it almost trembled on the word. He wondered if Harry could feel his heart racing in his fingertips.

Harry cleared his throat, another unsubtle change in conversation. “It’s Friday night,” he said.

“It is,” Louis agreed. “Something special about Friday night?”

“Well,” Harry’s mood seemed to dip suddenly. “I used to have movie night with Zayn every Friday. But now he’s very busy with work and I think he might have a secret boyfriend or something.”

“Secret boyfriend?” Louis asked curiously.

“There's someone he keeps texting constantly but he won’t tell me who. I think it’s a guy because the way he smiles at his phone,” Harry explained.

“Hm,” Louis said, “It’s strange because I’m having a very similar situation with Niall.”

“You don’t think-?” Harry looked up at Louis.

They laughed suddenly at the very idea, there was no way.

“Well,” Louis grabbed a towel and wiped off Harry’s back. “I don’t know about Zayn- but I’d certainly like to help restart the tradition of Friday movie night. For as long as we can.”

“Yeah?” Harry asked, looking at Louis like he was his own personal sunbeam.

“Course, curly,” Louis kissed his forehead and helped Harry back into his shirt.

“What shall we watch?” he asked walking over to the movie cabinet. “Something cute? Something funny?”

“Cute and funny!” Harry said.

“Well thank you, darling,” Louis bowed.

Harry rolled his eyes. “You’re incorrigible! Just pick one. I like them all.”

“I hope you would,” Louis chuckled, “they’re all your movies.”

They end up picking _Finding Nemo_ , settling in with a bowl of popcorn on Harry’s tummy and Harry mostly in Louis’s lap. The tissue box from the coffee table soon joined them on the sofa as Harry started bawling over Marlin trying to raise Nemo on his own. Louis stroked his fingers through Harry’s hair, bending his head back onto his shoulder. Harry turned into Louis’s neck and muffled a few soft sobs as Louis comforted him.

“Sometimes I feel more lost than Nemo,” Harry said quietly as Nemo was added to the dentist’s aquarium.

“Why’s that?” Louis asked.

“No one is trying to find me,” Harry answered. It sounded a bit dramatic even to his own ears, but he was feeling weepy and there was no amount of maple and sea salt popcorn to fill the hole he still had in his heart. A sob wracked through his body and Louis held him tighter.

“That’s because I’ve already found you,” Louis pressed the words just beside Harry’s ear.

Harry pulled back a little to look into Louis’s eyes. Louis looked scared, but of what, Harry wasn’t sure. “What do you mean?” he asked.

Louis’s face flushed with color as he tried to find the right words. “I know this is probably too fast- but I really like you, Harry.”

“I like you too, Louis,” Harry said.

Louis shook his head. “You don’t understand, Harry. I like you like you.” He ruffled his hair are he tried to figure out the words he wanted. “This past week together has been the best in my whole life,” Louis told him. “I love being here with you and I wouldn’t mind it if you never let me leave. Ever.” He hoped that conveyed what he meant.

“Louis,” Harry started and pulled away from Louis so that they were sitting square with one another. “That’s very sweet but-.” Damien had said he’d loved being with Harry as well and that’s how they’d ended up living together so soon after they starteddating. One month of dating Damien and they were practically married and this looked like that all over again. Harry seemed fated with men that got too serious too fast. And Louis had a reputation. Harry was surprised to find himself no longer crying but instead slightly angry. “You can’t mean that! You can’t be so sure so quickly. Damien promised me so many things and he left me,” there were the tears. “I can’t deal with that again, Louis. I’ve got the baby to think about,” he exhaled harshly, “I don’t have the strength to deal with another broken heart so soon.”

“I’m not him, Harry,” Louis stated simply.

“I know you aren’t. I know, but,” Harry’s hands were fiddling over his tummy as he tried to voice his concerns. “You- you-.”

“I’m a slut,” Louis said simply and Harry stilled completely, looking a bit shocked.

“Louis, that’s not-,” Harry started.

“It’s true!” Louis said. “Or at least it was- a year ago- but I’m not anymore. I don’t sleep around and I’ve never cheated and I’ve never felt this way about anyone else before.” His eyes were piercing blue as they met Harry’s.

Harry let out a sound that could only be described as a squeak. “Of all the people you’ve- dated? Or slept with? You’ve never-?” fallen in love? Is that what Louis was describing? Was Louis in love with him? It seemed too fast to be true.

Louis shook his head slowly.

“I don’t understand how you can be so sure so fast!” Harry exclaimed.

Louis shrugged, smiling to himself. “It doesn’t seem fast to me, Harry,” he scratched the back of head, “I’ve liked you- god- since I first saw you- since you peed on my shoe at that fashion show.”

“Fashion show...?” Harry asked, mind reeling with Louis’s confession. His eyes went wide as the memory came flooding back. “Oh my god! You _were_ there- at my first runway show!” 

His nervousness that evening had been overwhelming, even with Zayn there to hold his hand. He'd been using thebathroom for the millionth time before they put him in his fancy runway outfit when the restroom door swung open and a stranger sidled up to the other urinal. Harry hadn’t realized he was shaking until the stranger said, “You all right, curly?” And Harry had been so startled he’d swung around and peed slightly on the stranger’s shoe.

“OH GOD!” He’d exclaimed, tucking himself back in his pants and zipping them quickly. “I’m so so so sorry,” he'd waved his hands back and forth in panic.

“It’s all right,” the stranger'd said with a warm smile. His hair looked frantically styled, tight black skinny jeans, holes ripped at the knees, baggy t-shirt with the sleeves cut off at different lengths, his eyes lined with black eyeliner. He'd looked every inch rock and roll and hard edges but with the kindest piercing blue eyes Harry had ever seen. 

“No need to be so nervous,” said the stranger, “in here or out there.” He jerked his thumb towards the door. “You’re gonna smash it.”

Harry remembered leaving the bathroom feeling a bit calmer and wishing to takethe stranger with him. He wished he’d asked the strangers name but then he’d been swept by an assistant and dressed for the show and the whole thing after thatwas a blur.

Neither of them moved. Harry was staring at Louis like he’d grown another head. Louis couldn’t read his expression but it didn’t seem like a good one. Harry’s head cocked, staring intently into Louis’s eyes as if to check he was telling the truth.

“I’m sorry,” Louis stood up, breaking the silence that had enveloped them. It snapped the tension in the room.

“Don’t,” Harry shook his head. “Don’t go.”

“Harry,” Louis sat back down only to stand back up again. “I’ve just made everything horribly awkward now and I think I’ve probably destroyed our friendship and any chance at being anything more.”

“I don’t understand,” Harry started.

“Anything more- like your boyfriend,” Louis began to explain.

“NO,” Harry huffed, “I don’t understand how you could have liked me for this long!”

It was Louis’s turn to stare.

“I was so awkward and leggy and dismal and now I’m- pregnant and I’m an emotional wreck and you’re here,” Harry waved his arms around in broad sweeping motions.  His anger was melting into sadness. “Everything’s a mess and you’re here.”

“I’m sorry I made a mess of everything,” Louis said.

“You’ve not made a mess,” Harry said. “I was a mess before you showed up. Everything with Damien. I just thought I knew where my life was going and now I’m not sure,” he sighed. He wished desperately that he could pull his legs into his chest but he couldn’t. So he wrapped his arms around himself and held his chest hanging his head to lull near his shoulder as he tried not to cry. “When you first came over I didn’t know what was going to happen. I thought you’d just be a nice break from all the crying. An escape from everything. And now-.”

Louis sat down beside him, placing a hand on Harry’s thigh before pulling it back, placing it on his own lap. He rubbed his palms down his thighs before leaning forward and cupping his face in his hands, massaging his temples, hands aching with the need to hold Harry.

A warm palm stilled his worrying fingers, longer digits lacing between his. Harry pulled him closer until Louis was in his lap as much as he could be, reaching for Louis’s other hand to lace those fingers as well.

Harry’s face was streams of glossy salty tears and wide searching eyes. “I don’t know what’s going to happen but I know in my heart that I want to give you a chance, Louis,” he confessed.

Louis’s heart skipped a beat, holding Harry’s hands tighter.

“You seem to fit in the empty spaces,” Harry continued, heart feeling lighter as the words rolled out.

“Please,” Louis forgot how to breathe. “That’s all I’ve ever wanted.”

Harry managed a small grin before he continued, voice very serious. “I’m going kill you if you break my heart,” he choked out a sob and shook his head. “It will kill me if you break my heart.”

Louis pulled his hands away from Harry’s cupping his face and kissing his wet cheeks. “I’d rather die than break your heart,” Louis told him and then he kissed him deep, thumbs rubbing circles on the apples of Harry’s cheeks. It was slow and thorough and everything Louis couldn’t say with words.

Harry held his waist, gripping hard at Louis’s shirt. “Stay the night with me?” Harry asked. “I’m so tired of sleeping alone.”

“Yes,” Louis said immediately, nodding as he kissed Harry.

__

Louis woke up the next morning with a mouth full of curls, arms still wrapped around Harry as tightly as he dared. He blinked his eyes open, heart not ready for how angelic Harry looked in his sleep. The rosy pink and cupid bow curve of his pouty lips, his long dark eyelashes, and the point of his nose. Louis wanted to nip at every part of it, but didn’t wish to disturb the scene before him.

He smiled and couldn’t stop smiling. They’d gone to Harry’s room immediately following their conversation and Harry hadlent him pajama bottoms and a toothbrush and Zayn’s spare contact case. They kissed in between hushed conversations about their favorite foods and family vacations they’d taken when they were younger. They had talked until Harry couldn't keep his eyes open so he rolled over and reached back to wrap Louis around himself saying _,_ “If I push you away in the middle of the night don’t take it personally- pregnancy has given my body temperature a mind of it’s own.”

“I won’t, curly,” Louis had promised.

But apparently Harry hadn’t gotten too overheated because there they were curled around each other like cats.

Harry stirred; groaning as his body woke up to find it was still pregnant. Withgreat amount of effort he rolled on his back and then towards Louis, Louis just lifting his arm to rest it right back in place across Harry. “You’re still here,” Harry smiled sleepily and Louis just wanted to kiss him. “You stayed.”

“Of course I did,” Louis murmured back. “Couldn’t- wouldn’t leave my boy. Especially not when he asked me to stay.”

“Your boy,” Harry’s smile broadened to reveal that dimple that Louis loved. “Boyfriend.”

“Boyfriend,” Louis’s eyes crinkled and he kissed Harry, “I like the sound of that.”

“Hey, Louis?” Harry asked.

“Yes, love?” Louis answered.

“Do- do you think you could maybe stay here this weekend? Like- bring an overnight bag? Pack in as much as we can until you have to start rehearsals next week?” Harry asked.

“Weeell,” Louis sighed. “I don’t suppose that would be too much trouble.”

“No? You don’t suppose?” Harry fixed him with a look.

“Seeing as I’ve been here almost all week anyway,” Louis continued.

“You’re such a knob head,” Harry giggled “Just please say yes.”

“Yes, of course!” Louis answered and he tickled under Harry’s arms.

“Hey, no fair!” Harry giggled. “I have to pee and you’re making it worse!”

 

__

After a quick breakfast, Louis ran home to collect his clothes and necessary ablutions, agreeing to be back around Harry’s place at 1 o'clock.

He needed a beer and a few hours to collect his thoughts, but mostly he needed to talk to Niall. He opened two bottles of beer and sat on the couch and dialed Niall’s number.

“You arse,” Niall answered on the first ring.

“Were you- texting someone?” Louis asked.

“What?” Niall responded defensively.

“You answered so quickly,” Louis commented.

“Shut up, don’t change the subject,” Niall scolded.

“I wasn’t aware there was a subject,” Louis said.

“YOU ARSE,” Niall repeated. “Where the fuck have you been?”

“With Harry,” Louis told him.

“I FUCKING KNEW IT,” Niall cried gleefully. “Are you married yet? Did you propose? Are you having a June wedding?”

“God you’re such a nosy prick. I didn’t miss you,” Louis teased.

“Speaking of pricks,” Niall continued.

“Shut up,” Louis sighed.

“All right, I’m done teasing,” Niall told him. “Please share now.”

“I don’t want to after all that,” Louis spat.

Niall started whimpering on the other end of the phone like a begging dog.

“Fine, you goddamn golden retriever,” Louis took a deep breath. “He’s- agreed to be my boyfriend.”

“STOP WAIT A MINUTE,” Niall crowed.

"Wait for what?" Louis said.

“FILL MY CUP PUT SOME LIQUOR IN IT.”

“Are you- quoting Uptown Funk at me?” Louis asked confusedly.

“YOU FUCKING DID IT MAN,” Niall was yelling excitedly again.

“Did what?” Louis asked.

“MADE YOUR DREAMS COME TRUE WITH YOUR DREAM MAN,” Niall made smoochy noises and Louis just sighed.

“I don’t understand why you’re my best mate,” Louis told him.

“Because no one else will put up with you,” Niall laughed.

“Right you are,” Louis conceded.

“So when do I get to meet him?” Niall asked.

“What?!”

“When do I get to meet this boyfriend of yours to make sure he’s worthy of my best mate,” Niall insisted.

“You’re killing me,” Louis said.

“This weekend, perhaps?” Niall pressed.

“FINE!” Louis said. “I’ll talk to Harry- maybe we can have you over for dinner or something.”

“We~?” Niall raised his intonation.

“Oh my god I’m hanging up now,” and Louis did just that. He downed his first bottle of beer in three gulps but took his time with the second. It was inevitable that Harry would meet Niall anyway- it would probably be better on their terms.

Louis showered before packing the duffel he usually took on tour. One pair of skinny jeans, two shirts, a pair of boxers, his favorite pair of alien socks, toothbrush, contact solution, and a sweatshirt and he was ready for whatever the weekend held.

He was back at Harry’s place five minutes early, inviting himself in as Harry had instructed him to do. Harry was in the kitchen fixing peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for them with a heaping helping of potato chips.

“Hey, love,” Louis called, putting his bag on top of his shoes. He walked into the kitchen, placing a hand on the small of Harry’s back and kissing his cheek.

“Hi, babe,” Harry beamed. “I made lunch,” he handed Louis his plate.

“This looks amazing,” Louis grinned, “Haven’t had one of these in ages.”

“I expect to be making a lot of them in the years to come. Thought I’d brush up,” he smiled.

“I volunteer to be at the receiving end of any future cooking adventures for brushing up or any other reason,” Louis said popping a chip in his mouth.

“Good,” Harry laughed, grabbing his plate and a grape soda from the fridge. “Now- want to watch _Days of Our Lives_ with me?” 

“Definitely,” Louis nodded. “Wait-.”

Harry turned back around. “Is everything all right?”

“Brilliant,” Louis said. “I- just- I called Niall earlier and I told him you were my boyfriend.”

Harry ducked his head and smiled. “Oh did you?”

“Mmhm,” Louis said. “But now- he wants to meet you.”

“Oh,” Harry said.

“He doesn’t have to-,” Louis backtracked quickly.

“No, I’d love to meet him, Louis,” Harry assured him. “I know you haven’t seen him in a week- I haven’t talked to Zayn in ages either.” His eyes went wide as an idea struck.

“Why don’t we invite them over for dinner?” he suggested. “I’ll cook something- we can get the meeting-of-the-best-friends over all in one sitting?”

“That’s brilliant,” Louis told him, walking over to Harry with his plate in hand, wrapping his free arm around Harry’s waist as they made their way to their usually spots on the sofa.

__

By some miracle both Zayn and Niall were free for dinner. They were to come at 7 o'clock. Niall was in charge of bringing beer if he wished and Zayn offered to bring dessert saying he’d stocked up for Harry and he didn’t want the ice cream cartons over at his place (too much temptation as his Calvin Klein shoot rolled around.)

“We better go shopping,” Harry said after plans were arranged. He tucked his phone back in his pocket before leaning back into the sofa and pulling Louis in close again.

“What are we having?” Louis asked, wrapping his arms around Harry’s waist, kissing his clothed shoulder.

“Well,” Harry tilted his head contemplatively. “Zayn’s diet is pretty restricted right now because of the shoot- so something leaner.”

“Chicken?” Louis suggested. “That’s- lean right?”

“It is,” Harry smiled, biting back a chuckle. “Why don’t we make chicken tikka?”

“Tikka?” Louis asked.

“It’s Indian,” Harry explained, “One of Zayn’s favorites. We can roast some veggies and make brown rice.”

“That sounds awful healthy,” Louis made a face.

Harry chuckled. “It is healthy. You’ve been eating quite healthy all week.”

“Because you’ve been feeding me,” Louis leaned in for a kiss.

“I have,” Harry deepened the kiss.

“Want me run to the store?” Louis asked, nipping at Harry’s bottom lip.

“Hm,” Harry grinned, “do you know what goes in chicken tikka?”

“No,” Louis laughed, “but you could make me a list.”

“I thought,” Harry kissed him again, “we might go together.”

Louis pulled away from the next kiss. “Babe- I’m not sure that’s such a good idea.”

“Because you’re a regular-level rock star and I’m a model and people will talk?” Harry asked.

“Super model,” Louis corrected.

“Right- a regular-level rock star and a super model and people will talk,” Harry reiterated. 

“You’ve just been dealing with media scrutiny and I don’t want you to have to deal with those idiots anymore than you have to,” Louis explained.

“But-,” Harry hesitated, “But you won’t mind being seen with me?” he clarified.

Louis’s eyes went wide. “God, babe, that’s not it at all,” he nuzzled into Harry’s neck. “I’d make a press release right now and hold your hand walking through Times Square yelling at the top of my lungs how amazing you are if you’d like,” he pressed gentle kisses along Harry’s jaw line.

“I’ll book our plane tickets for New York tonight then,” Harry giggled, hands gripping Louis’s waist as he started kissing his neck. He moaned as Louis bit along his collarbone. “Babe,” he gasped. “We need to get going- it’s almost five.”

Louis pulled back with a sigh. “All right,” he groaned.

“We have time for this later,” Harry waggled his eyebrows.

“Well then what are we waiting for?” Louis stood up, pulling Harry to his feet. “Are you sure about this?”

Harry nodded firmly. “There’s a grocery shop two blocks from here- I go there all the time. It’s very low profile, very sweet owner,” he assured, “we shouldn’t be bothered while we’re there.”

“That sounds nice.”

__

Twenty minutes later they were debating different colored bell peppers in the veggie section. “The yellow ones are the sweetest,” Louis said. “They’d go nice with the tikka.”

“You’ve never had tikka, love,” Harry laughed, picking a yellow pepper anyway.

“I didn’t know cauliflower came in purple,” Louis said next, attention immediately drawn away. He grabbed the purple vegetable, looking at it from every angle.

“Not a frequent visitor of the fruit and veggie section?” Harry asked.

“Oh shut it,” Louis smiled anyway as Harry took it from him.

“Do you like cauliflower?” Harry asked.

“I think so,” Louis nodded and Harry put it in their basket. “Are we having that for dinner as well?” Louis asked.

Harry shook his head. “No. But we’re going to need something to eat for dinner tomorrow.”

Louis grinned so wide it hurt. He was spending the night and all the rest of tomorrow with Harry as well. What had his life even become?

__

Zayn arrived first. Louis hung back in the kitchen, pretending to chop things, as Harry answered the door. He couldn’t hear what was being said but Harry sounded absolutely giddy.

Harry was draped over Zayn when they entered the kitchen, giggling into his ear as Zayn seemed to be listing all the ice cream flavors he’d bought for Harry over the past few weeks.

“It wasn’t all that bad, was it?” Harry pouted.

“It was, mate,” Zayn nodded, setting the ice cream on the counter.

Zayn was easily the most attractive person on the face of the earth, Louis was almost sure that on any other planet that could also be the case. He was all handsome sharp features, with smoldering eyes and that James Dean coif.

“You must be Louis,” Zayn offered no form of handshake, just an easy smile. Harry watched them as he removed the ice cream from the bag and stacked it in the freezer according to content (caramel on one side, fruit flavors on the other.)

“And you must be Zayn,” Louis raised his eyebrows and tried to smile like he wasn’t intimidated.

Zayn smiled genuinely then and pulled Louis into an abrupt hug that lasted only long enough for Zayn to say, “If you hurt him I will kill you.”

Louis’s smile fell completely, unable to fake it even for Harry as he swallowed audibly.

“What’s for dinner? Smells like chicken tikka! Harry, you didn’t!” Zayn rubbed his hands together and looked at the spread of food they’d started setting out.

“I did,” Harry held out his arms as if to present the food before pulling them into his chest. “Thought I’d give you a little taste of home before your big campaign shoot.”

“You’re too sweet, babes,” Zayn kissed Harry’s cheek and Louis was honestly too petrified of the man to be jealous. It was sweet how protective Zayn was and Louis was trying to see it that way. “I’m starved.”

“Well we’re wai-,” Harry started but Louis grabbed his elbow and squeezed gently.

“It’s all right to start,” Louis assured him.

“Well- all right,” Harry shrugged and gave him a small smile.

“Are we eating in the dining room?” Zayn asked, grabbing the plate of chicken as he went.

“We are,” Harry called after him picking up the rice and veggies. He looked to Louis for an explanation of earlier.

“Niall’s notoriously late,” Louis said quietly. “If Zayn’s starved there’s no point in making him wait longer, honestly.”

“You’re sure?” Harry asked, eyes warm and understanding.

“Very,” Louis nodded.

“You rock stars,” Harry gave him a soft peck before heading out to the table.

Zayn didn’t mention the extra place setting as they plated their food. It’d be Harry’s way to set a place to make both sides even or- it could be for the baby honestly- who knew.

But the doorbell rang ten minutes later and Louis got up from the table immediately in the middle of Harry and Zayn’s conversation about the Calvin Klein contract. Zayn kept looking over at Louis like he was going to give him the third degree at any moment and Louis wanted to avoid that as long as possible. “That’d be for me,” he said.

“Harry, did you set me up on a blind date?” Louis heard Zayn’s voice.

Harry laughed loudly at the absurdity of the idea

“NIALL,” Louis growled in a harsh whisper. “THE ONE TIME I NEEDED YOU ON TIME.”

“Hello to you too,” Niall answered him, also in a whisper. “I was here on time- I was just- waiting.”

“FOR WHAT?! A SIGN FROM GOD?!” Louis demanded.

Niall’s eyes twinkled oddly. “Kinda.”

Louis rolled his eyes and pulled his friend into the apartment. “You’re ridiculous.”

“Smells delicious,” Niall said in a normal voice as he was dragged through the kitchen and into the dining room.

“Thank you, Niall,” Harry stood up from the table to properly greet him and Zayn dropped his fork and started coughing.

“NIALL?!” Zayn downed half his water.

Niall looked paler than usual and nearly turned right back around out of the room to the front door. “Zayn?”

“Niall?” Louis raised his eyebrows.

“Louis!” Niall seemed almost angry.

“Harry,” Harry said loudly and put his hands on his tummy. “And baby.”

The other three turned their attention to him and the tension was broken by laughter. Zayn sat back in his chair and the other three took their places, Niall right next to Zayn.

“I take it you two know each other then,” Louis said immediately, leaning over his plate, food completely neglected.

Niall and Zayn looked at each other both blushing a fierce shade of tomato red.

“We’ve never actually met in person,” Niall said finally, hand idling over his phone.

“No,” Zayn agreed. “We’ve just been- texting a lot.”

“SECRET BOYFRIEND!” Harry said to Louis.

“You were right, babe,” Louis nodded.

Niall started to match the deep rouge of the accent wall as he slumped in his chair. “We’re- not-,” he glanced to Zayn and had to look away again.

Zayn seemed to be trying to commit every grain of rice to memory as the conversation continued. “Can I talk to you in the kitchen, Haz?” he asked, standing up and leaving the table, not waiting for an answer.

Harry stood up, giving Louis’s shoulder a squeeze before following his friend out.

“We didn’t mean to ambush anyone,” Harry offered gently as he walked over to Zayn, who was resting his forehead against the cool door of the refrigerator. “We just thought we’d get the meeting-the-best-friends out of the way all at once- each of us having someone on our sides so it was less weird.”

Zayn looked at him finally. “You swear you didn’t know?”

“Didn’t know what?” Harry asked.

“That I was texting Niall Horan from No Control,” Zayn tried to hide the panic in his voice.

“I’d swear up and down on Martha Steward Living if you wanted me to, Zee. Why have you been texting him anyway?” Harry put his hand on Zayn’s back.

“I was trying to look out for you,” Zayn explained.

Back in the dining room Louis and Niall were in the middle of a similar conversation.

“So-,” Louis prompted and Niall lost it.

“I didn’t know he was THAT attractive in person!” Niall gestured frantically with his hands.

“Whoa whoa,” Louis soothed. “WHAT?”

“Did you see his cheek bones?” Niall grabbed Louis’s face in both his hands across the table and shook it back and forth.

Which is exactly when Harry and Zayn reentered the room.

“Sorry for leaving,” Zayn said evenly, “it was incredibly rude of me.”

“No apologies necessary, mate,” Louis grinned, face still sandwiched between Niall’s hands.

Niall released him and sat back in his chair. He inhaled deeply and turned to Zayn. “Hello, I’m Niall Horan,” he offered Zayn a handshake.

“Hi, Niall,” Zayn grinned giving Niall his hand, “I’m Zayn Malik.”

“Nice to meet you,” they shook hands, eye contact not breaking.

“Foods getting cold,” Harry informed them all and they finally sat down to actually eat.

“I’ve never had this kind of chicken before,” Niall said with his mouth full. “It’s delicious, Harry.”

“Thank you, Niall,” Harry grinned, “It’s Zayn’s favorite.”

Zayn colored slightly at that.

“Oi,” Louis drew the attention away from him which Zayn was quitegrateful for. “How do you know I didn’t cook the chicken?”

“Because it’s not burnt and we’re not in the hospital yet,” Niall shot back.

They all laughed at that except for Louis who rolled his eyes and said, “Fair enough.” The conversation continued amicably for twenty minutes until Louis just had to know.

“How did you two start texting exactly?”

Niall glanced to Zayn as if to offer the question to him.

“I had my people call his people,” Zayn shrugged.

Louis swallowed hard on his next bite of rice and Niall raised a smug eyebrow.

“Yes but why Niall?” Harry asked now. “Not that you aren’t lovely, Nialler.”

“Thanks, Harry,” Niall chuckled.

“I thought that bit was obvious,” Zayn shrugged like it was obvious _._

“He’s my best friend,” Louis put the pieces together and Zayn nodded. “He was looking for information on me from the most reliable source next to yours truly. _”_ His tone was almost accusatory, though he couldn’t exactly blame Zayn, not with his past transgressions.

“I just wanted to make sure you really genuinely weren’t dating whats-her-name and that you hadn’t punched anyone recently,” Zayn said.

“And I told him you hadn’t,” Niall offered a wide grin.

“Thanks for keeping my privacy, Ni,” Louis squinted at him.

“Don’t give me that face,” Niall shook his head and laughed, “you’ve been arse over tit for Harry for years and his best friend calls me to make sure you’re a stand up guy? I’d’ve given him bloody missile codes to make sure you got a chance with Harry.”

Louis’s expression melted completely _._ “That’s the sweetest thing you’ve ever said to me,” he told Niall, feeling oddly emotional.

“Don’t get used to it,” Niall nearly threw a chunk of bell pepper at him before remembering they were among other adults.

“You saying you’d lie to me to have given him a chance?” Zayn tilted his head and addressed Niall directly for the first time that evening.

Niall laughed deep in his gut at the question. “No way. If Louis was a total arse I would’ve said. And a few years ago,” he glanced across the table as he let his sentence hang.

“Yeah yeah,” Louis waved it off. “Harry knows. I was a slut.”

“I don’t like you calling yourself that,” Harry said quietly, sounding genuinely hurt.

“Sorry, love,” Louis apologized, not sounding particularly sorry.

His self-deprecation was starting to get to Harry but Harry didn’t want to address that at the table in front of their friends. Later. They could talk later. The mystery of Niall and Zayn was sitting in front of them for the time being.

“So you kept texting then after you were finished talking about me?” Louis asked.

“Believe you me- talking about you took longer than expected. I didn’t know there were so many ways to threaten bodily harm,” Niall looked at Zayn fondly.

“Harry’s very important to me,” Zayn offered Harry a smile.

Harry absolutely glowed under the attention. “Love you, Z.”

“Love you too, H,” Zayn made a smoochy face at him.

“You two are disgusting,” Niall frowned at them.

“Hey,” Harry made his sad frog face. “We’re adorable.”

“I think their friendship is just a bit different than ours, Nialler,” Louis shrugged.

“Much less nipple pinching,” Niall nodded.

“I’ll leave that to Louis I think,” Zayn said casually before following it up with, “Speaking of, who wants dessert?”

Niall stood up immediately and followed Zayn out into the kitchen leaving Louis and Harry to blush in their seats.

“Do you like your nipples played with?” Louis asked, tilting his head.

Harry blushed a rosy pink. “I think I hear some chunky monkey calling my name.” He stood up and walked towards the kitchen but stopped so suddenly in the threshold Louis nearly ran into him as he followed.

“What?” Louis asked from behind Harry. He couldn’t see over Harry’s slim but broad shoulders, Harry lifted his arm so Louis could peek around. He was pressed close to Harry, warm fabric of Harry’s shirt tickling against his face as he squished in to see.

Niall and Zayn were standing very close to one another over a carton of Americone Dream.Zayn seemed to be explaining to Niall that he wouldn’t be eating any ice cream this evening as his shoot was this coming Thursday. Zayn placed his hands on his stomach and Harry knew that he was resisting the word “bloating” because that was a terribly unsexy word and Zayn was definitely using his bedroom eyes. Niall seemed to read the placement of Zayn’s hand as an invitation because he put one of his own over Zayn’s, eyes flicking from their now touching hands to Zayn’s lips. Usually Louis would’ve yelled “get a room!” at the pair of them, but he wasn’t entirely sure how Harry would react. He also would have felt particularly bad if he unknowingly threw Niall into an awkward situation with someone it would appear he genuinely liked.

Louis pulled Harry back into the dining room a bit to talk to him. “Zayn is gay, right?” Louis clarified.

“Yeah,” Harry nodded, “Very much so. Why?”

“Because Niall- isn’t,” Louis told him. “I’ve never seen him fancy a guy outside of a passing- like he had a huge crush on Justin Bieber for two months but that was justsilly and this is a whole other level.”

“Oh,” Harry’s eyes went wide. “Do you think Zayn knows?”

“Hard to say.” Louis squinted and they both looked around the doorframe to see that Zayn found the melon that Harry had cut him for dessert. He was feeding it to Niall using only his fingers and Niall was taking his time to lick them off. “Probably not,” Louis’s voice squeaked.

“I WANT A HUGE BOWL OF CHUNKY MONKEY,” Harry said loudly, turning his back to the kitchen, grabbing Louis, and walking backwards into the room. Louis just caught Zayn and Niall pulling away from one another as Harry sidled up to the counter.

“I’m not giving you my chunks of chocolate this time,” Louis told Harry seriously.

Harry pouted, “But. Pregnant boyfriend!”

“You should just eat chocolate with the ice cream then,” Louis sighed.

“That’s brilliant,” Harry declared after a moment of consideration _._ “We bought that extra dark chocolate earlier!” he started rummaging through the candy drawer pulling out a few odds and ends that Niall looked very keen on.

“Are those gummy sharks?” Niall joined Harry, excitedly chatting about the merits of the squishy bottoms of the sharks verses the top gummy part.

Zayn was idly picking at his bowl of watermelon, watching Niall and Harry bump hips as Niall praised Harry’s collection of sweets.

Louis approached Zayn gingerly. “I’m not going to stab you or anything,” Zayn told him once he was close enough.

“I didn’t think you were,” Louis tucked his hands in his back pockets and then thought better of it.

“I was just worried about Harry. Damien did quite a number on him,” Zayn’s eyes flicked overLouis in an effort to assess him objectively. “But from everything Niall’s said and everything Harry’s said- you might be good for him.”

“Yeah?” Louis felt at ease for the first time all day. He’d been more worried about this than he’d known.

“Yeah,” Zayn popped another piece of melon in his mouth and chewed contemplatively. “It worries me that he always picks people whofall for him too fast. I’ve not known him his whole life but from what he’s told me- seems like they want everything from him all at once and right away. And he’s too sweet and generous to say no.”

“I know,” Louis’s eyes followed Harry, who was now throwing jujubes at Niall’s face to try to get him to catch them. Their success rate was embarrassingly low.“That’s part of what makes him so wonderful but then- it’s hard to protect against the assholes.”

“Right,” Zayn seemed surprised that he agreed.

“I’m glad he’s got you to help him,” Louis placed his hand on Zayn’s shoulder without thinking but Zayn didn’t seem to mind. “Speaking of,” he glanced over to Niall. “I don’t know what’s going on between you two but please don’t toy with him. He’s new to all this and if you hurt him- well you know,” Louis finished.

“New to all this?” Zayn asked.

“WHAT?!” Niall broke through their conversation, “Sorry- that was loud. You’ve NEVER played FIFA?!” He was talking to Harry who had opened up a carton of ice cream and was using different pieces of chocolate as edible spoons.

“Never,” Harry shook his head.

“We’re playing right now,” Niall informed him.

“But I’ve not got any sort of gaming system,” Harry said as Niall headed for the living room.

“S’okay,” Niall turned towards the front door instead. “I’ve got one in me car.”

Zayn and Harry looked to Louis for an explanation. “No long road trips in the modeling world?” he asked. They shook their heads. “Niall never leaves home now without an xbox, a guitar, and at least three flavors of Pringles.”

Niall returned five minutes later with a rucksack and his guitar. They made an evening of it and unsurprisingly Harry was awful at FIFA. Zayn, on the other hand, was a gaming wizard and, as Louis and Niall quickly found, a total dork _._ He and Louis had rivaling comic book collections and shared a love of Frank Miller’s Batman.

When midnight rolled around, Zayn politely excused himself to head home, Niall followed shortly thereafter. Harry was fast asleep on the couch, curled in on himself, tucked under the armrest as Louis said goodbye to their friends.

“Love,” Louis cooed, stirring Harry. “You can’t sleep like this you’ll hurt your back.”

“Mmmm,” Harry snuffled but opened his eyes. “Where are they?”

“Left about two minutes ago,” Louis pulled Harry up, holding him tight in his arms. “Let’s get you to bed, yeah?”

“We need to talk,” Harry mumbled as Louis lead him to his room.

“What about, love?” Louis started tugging Harry’s shirt off, helping him into his sleep tunic.

“You-,” Harry yawned, lying back before Louis could get his pants off.

“Me?” Louis encouraged but Harry was fast asleep.

Louis finished putting on Harry’s pajamas before putting on his own and brushing his teeth, worrying all the while what Harry meant. Millions of niggling negative thoughts washed through him and he lay in bed wide-awake.

__

The next morningLouis had had a fitful night of sleep, tossing and turning so much he nearly went to the sofa but didn’t want Harry to wake up alone.

“Good morning, baby,” Harry rolled over in Louis’s arms, kissing the tip of nose.

“Morning,” Louis didn’t open his eyes.

“Are you all right? You look sleepy,” concern laced Harry’s voice.

“I didn’t sleep well,” Louis opened his eyes wearily.

“Did I kick you too much?” Harry worried his bottom lip. “Did I steal the covers?”

“No, love,” Louis giggled. “You were fine.”

“Then what’s wrong?” Harry asked, curling in closer.

“Do you- remember what you said last night?” Louis answered.

Harry squinted his eyes. “I didn’t know you could fit so many gummy worms in your mouth all at once?”

“You did say that,” Louis chuckled. “But later- right before you fell asleep-.”

“You tucked me in and put me in my jim-jams,” Harry nuzzled his nose against Louis’s.

“I did,” Louis nodded, “but- you said we need to talk.”

Harry furrowed his brows. “Oh-,” he nodded as he remembered, “this might be an after breakfast conversation.”

“Please tell me,” Louis insisted.

“It bothers me,” Harry sighed, “when you call yourself a slut. Because you’re speaking very harshly about someone who matters very much to me. And just because you’ve slept with lots of people doesn’t mean you’ve done something wrong. You don’t need to be so down on yourself for it.”

Louis blinked a few times, warm relief rushing through him. Harry wasn’t breaking up with him or kicking him out of their weekend. “I’m sorry, love, I didn’t know,” he pressed a kiss to Harry’s lips. “I think it might have become a part of my identity and at one point I was proud of it and then I became ashamed the older I got but I couldn’t shake it.”

Harry pulled Louis in closer so that their stomachs were touching, Harry’s lengthy arms holding Louis tightly against him. “That’s terrible,” Harry’s voice was small and Louis could feel Harry’s tears against his collarbone. Louis’s arms went immediately around Harry.

“It’s all behind me now, love,” Louis ran his fingers through Harry’s hair, scratching at his scalp until Harry was near purring. “So many happy things in my life. I’ll stop calling myself that, yeah? Want my boyfriend to be proud of me.”

“I am proud of you, Lou,” Harry sniffled, kissing up Louis’s neck. It was innocent at first until Harry found a particular patch to suck on. Louis gasped as Harry’s teeth grazed over the mark Louis was sure he’d left. Harry pulled back to look at Louis’s neck, eyes still a bit red from the sudden onset crying. “Wear that proudly.”

“I will,” Louis raised an eyebrow at him.

“Now I have to pee,” Harry grunted as he sat up, pulling sheets and pillows as his back shifted with the weight.

Louis chuckled, pressing awkwardly in an effort to push Harry up and off the bed. Harry threw his arms up in triumph as he finally made it to standing _._ He paused suddenly as if remembering something, standing in the doorway of his en suite, and turned to give Louis a smirk.

“What?” Louis asked.

“Another thing from last night,” Harry raised an eyebrow, “I do like my nipples played with.”

__

It was a quintessential lazy Sunday, neither of them changing out of their pajamas. Louis fixed them both nutella toast for lunch. Harry tried to explain to him that it wasn’t a well rounded meal but Louis shrugged and stuck out his tummy saying it made him pretty round. Harry giggled, placing himself in Louis’s lap and kissing him silly.

The kisses grew dirtier, Harry rolling his hips in a slow rhythm that made Louis throw his head back and moan, exposing a column of neck Harry immediately attached his lips to.

“God, babe,’ Louis grabbed Harry’s hips, rocking with the rhythm Harry was making. He wanted to touch Harry everywhere and all at once. “Your mouth.”

Harry giggled as he left a trail of marks beside the one he’d left that morning. “You like my mouth?”

“I like every part of you,” Louis said sincerely. “You’re just very good with your mouth.” He pulled Harry into a hard kiss as his hands slipped under Harry’s sleeping tunic. Harry stopped moving his hips as Louis’s fingertips trailed up his sides. Louis stopped, looking into Harry’s eyes. “Is this- all right?”

“Please don’t stop,” Harry kissed him again as Louis’s hands found what they were looking for, pads of his thumbs rubbing over the buds of Harry’s nipples. Harry’s whole body shuddered with it, hips rocking down harder. “Louis,” he cried, hands tangling in Louis’s hair.

“You weren’t kidding,” Louis placed small kisses along Harry’s jaw, pinching slightly Harry’s right nipple. Harry moaned loudly and Louis could feel his hardening cock. “Can I use my mouth?” he asked, nearly breathlessly.

Harry nodded, lifting his arms so Louis could pull his tunic off and Louis’s tongue was there immediately, quick velvety movements on puckered flesh. Harry was sputtering moans as Louis switched to the other, fingers playing gently against his smaller supernumerary ones just below.

“You sound so pretty, Harry,” Louis kissed up Harry’s chest, licking across his collarbones.

“God- Louis,” Harry’s breath hitched in his throat. “I’m close.” His face flushed with the admission. “It’s been so long since-.”

Louis kissed him quiet. “It’s all right,” his hands found the sides of Harry’s face. “Been a while for me too. You make me feel like a bloody teenager again. Nearly came as soon as you sat in my lap.”

Harry laughed, hands sliding down from their hold in Louis’s hair to brush across his shoulders. He pressed his face against Louis’s neck as if to hide.

“Can I suck you off?” he felt Louis’s voice rumble against his cheek. He pulled back to see an eager expression with bright determined eyes.

“If-if you want to,” Harry seemed less than sure.

“It’s if you want me to,” Louis told him. “I’m here for you, love.”

“Yes,” Harry nodded, “I’d like that very much please. I just-,” he blushed.

“Not been naked in front of anyone- I remember,” Louis kissed his cheeks and across his eyelids and down his nose until Harry was calm in his lap again. Louis hoisted Harry up just long enough to swap them around, placing Harry neatly on the sofa as he sat between his legs.

Harry shivered a bit as Louis slipped his fingers beneath Harry’s waistband. He looked nervous and frightened and Louis felt an empty weight in the pit of his stomach. He glanced down, remembering Harry’s tunic, which he grabbed and helped Harry back into, hands caressing neatly down, covering the swell of Harry’s belly. “Is that better?”

“Much better, thank you, Louis,” Harry nodded, giving him a watery smile. “You’re so wonderful.”

Louis looked startled at that, clearly not expecting such a sincere expression. “I’ve not even gotten my mouth around you yet,” he offered humor in response.

“Just shush and take the compliment,” Harry scolded with no bite in his voice, lifting his hips so Louis could slip his pajama bottoms just low enough.

“Yes, Harry,” Louis looked up at him, facejust visible over the swell of his tummy from this angle. He wrapped his hand around him making Harry gasp.

“Louis-,” Harry started but his thoughts and sounds were drowned out by a guttural moan as Louis skipped baby steps and took him into his mouth as far as he could go, mouth easily meeting his hand. He held Harry there for a few moments, loving the weight of him on his tongue. Harry’s hands gripped at the sofa as Louis pulled back and suckled his tip, pumping gently at Harry’s base with his hand.

“Your cock is lovely, Haz,” he hold him, making sloppy wet sounds as he sucked just the head into his mouth.

“Lo-louis,” Harry warned, orgasm approaching faster than either of them would like.

Louis took him down again in one swift swallow, working his length with his tongue, humming gently. And that was all it took as pleasure tore through Harry. He shot hot down Louis’s throat, unable to remember the last time he’d come sohard.

Louis pulled off with a pop, swallowing like a champ. He nuzzled Harry’s softening cock before tucking it neatly back into Harry’s pants.

Louis moved to sit beside Harry who was still catching his breath. “Was that alright?” he asked tentatively.

Harry smiled broadly, dimple on full display. He pulled Louis closer to him so he could press their foreheads together. “You’re very good with your mouth as well.”

That startled a chuckle out of Louis. “You’re very cheeky.”

Harry nuzzled into his neck seemingly sleepy all of a sudden. “Thank you, Louis.”

“You don’t need to thank me for blow jobs,” he started but remembered his earlier scolding. “But you’re very welcome, curly. There are more where that came from.”

“Hm,” Harry smiled, curled into Louis, and fell asleep.

__

After Harry woke up he was extra clingy for the rest of the day, some part of him always touching Louis somewhere.

Later that evening Harry insisted on returning the favor, sitting cross-legged by the end of the bed as Louis sat on the edge, pumping his cock into his mouth. Louis came on Harry’s face, aiming for his lips and rosy, flushed cheeks, Harry smiling brilliantly.

Before bed, Louis scrubbed Harry from head to toe in the shower, taking extra care to wash his nooks and crannies. As he toweled Harry’s hair dry Harry reached for his hands and asked. “Will you go to my sonogram with me on Wednesday?”

Louis nearly stopped breathing, towel dropping out of his hand. “Yeah,” he said immediately and nodded. “Yes.”

“You don’t even know what time- you might have rehearsal at-,” Harry started, bending over to get the towel.

“I’ll reschedule,” Louis told him, swooping down to pick the towel up. “I want to be there, Haz, please.”

“All right,” Harry smiled, taking the towel from Louis to hang it up on the rack. “We can make a day of it? Go grocery shopping for dinner?”

“Anything you like, babe,” Louis grinned and nodded.

Harry took Louis’s face in his hands and kissed him gently.

“Will you rub my shoulders before we go to bed?” Harry asked.

“As you wish,” Louis pecked his lips three times before following him back into the bedroom.

__

Monday morning Louis was out of bed, frowning deeply to himself. He had an hour and a half to get to rehearsal but wanted nothing more than to super glue himself to the bed and Harry. But Harry was already up. Louis found him scrambling eggs in the kitchen, hips swaying to tune of “Lips Are Moving.”

“Cause if your lips are moving~,” Louis chimed in with the song, placing his hands on Harry’s hips.

Harry giggled, turning in Louis’s hold, “Tell me do you think I’m dumb?” He pecked Louis’s lips before they both sang, “I might be young but I ain’t stupid.”

“I didn’t know you listened to pop music,” Harry pressed another kiss to Louis’s lips.

“Course I do, listen to all types of music,” Louis scratched gently at Harry’s sides. “Hard to avoid that song as well.”

“You’re not just into broody alt rock?” Harry continued.

Louis laughed, “Regular-level rock stars can listen to whatever they like.” He tilted his head and looked at Harry, “You know I met her backstage- at the Grammys.”

“You didn’t!” Harry gasped.

“I did,” Louis nodded.

“Was she just the nicest person?” Harry asked hopefully.

Louis shrugged, head tilting from side to side. "She seemed a bit busy. Getting ready for her performance- couldn’t exactly chat. But she has a lovely smile and a firm handshake.”

Harry beamed at him, hugging him for no apparent reason. “That’s wonderful. You’ve got the coolest job.”

“Pretty sure you do, babe,” Louis kissed Harry’s cheek. “Speaking of- I’ve got to be off soon.”

“That’s right!” Harry turned his attention immediately back to cooking. “I’ve made you a proper English breakfast to set the day off right.”

Louis’s eyes went wide as Harry scooped eggs onto a plate with beans, toast, and sausage links. “This is beautiful,” Louis inhaled deeply. “Smells amazing.”

“Eat up!” Harry insisted. “Can’t be late for your first day.”

“Niall’s going to be late,” Louis said.

“Doesn’t mean you should be!” Harry snapped his fingers at him.

__

Louis was five minutes early to practice and Liam nearly died.

“What the fuck are you doing here?” he demanded.

“This is where practice is, yeah?” Louis asked.

“Don’t take the piss, Louis,” Liam shook his head. “What the fuck is going on?”

“Can’t a man be on time for work for once in his life?” Louis fiddled idly with a mic stand as a few technicians bustled about making final touches on equipment.

Liam grabbed Louis’s arm and guided him into a supply closet. “Tell me what’s going on,” he said flatly.

“There’s nothing going on,” Louis snapped, “I’m on time for work and you’re giving me shit.”

“There is most certainly something going on. You go missing for days, you’re on time for work, your clothes are clean, you don’t appear to be hungover- and- you look happy,” Liam concluded finally.

Louis tried not to smile but couldn’t help it. “Do I?”

“You do,” Liam answered, a bit bewildered. “I tried to pry it out of Niall but he’s just as secretive as you.”

“If you must know,” Louis folded his arms and then dropped them to his sides. Liam would need to be told at some point, especially if he and Harry were going to go public. “I’ve- got a boyfriend.”

Liam’s jaw dropped before he gathered himself. “How? When? What on- who is it?”

“Harry Styles,” Louis grinned broadly as he said his name.

Liam looked perplexed. “Not _the_ Harry Styles,” he said.

“Yes, _the_ Harry Styles,” Louis frowned.

“Not the Harry you’ve liked forever. The model.”

“Yes, that one. I don’t appreciate your tone, Leeyum,” Louis crossed his arms again.

“But HOW?” Liam asked.

“Met him at the Grammys- we’ve- just been texting,” Louis shifted his weight, rocking back and forth on his heels. 

“That’s where you’ve been? With him?” Liam folded his own arms, leaning against the doorframe in the cramped space.

“Yes, that’s where I’ve been,” Louis confirmed.

“I don’t understand,” Liam stated.

“What’s there to understand, Li?” Louis scratched at the back of his neck before refolding his arms defensively.

“You’ve not been papped! How could you not tell me about this sooner, Louis?!” Liam gesticulated wildly.

“We’ve been staying at his place. We’re not idiots! I’m telling you now. We weren’t even a thing until Friday. I wanted to be sure before I said something,” Louis explained.

That made Liam pause, standing up straight and adjusting his suit jacket. “You must really like him,” he said finally.

“I do,” Louis nodded. “I’m not sure how he feels about it- but I’m in it for the long haul.”

Liam’s eyebrows shot up. “You can’t be serious.”

“Dead serious, Li,” Louis leveled him with a look. “Which reminds me!” he cleared his throat. “Is it all right if I take Wednesday off? Or come in early or summat?”

Liam clutched at his heart, leaning back against the door again. “Who the fuck are you and what have you done with Louis?”

“Oh fuck off,” Louis rolled his eyes.

“I’m sorry,” Liam gave a humorless laugh, “This is completely out of character. Old you would just not _’_ ve shown up. We would’ve wasted the day trying to find you but here you are- asking for the day for- what exactly?”

“Harry’s got an appointment- I’d like to take him,” Louis scratched at the back of his head, looking sheepishly at the floor.

“You’ve got it bad, Tommo,” Liam whistled and shook his head.

“Fuck off, can I have Wednesday or not?” Louis repeated.

“Yeah, Lou,” Liam nodded, “you can have Wednesday.” An evil smirk found its way to his face. “But you gotta explain it to the boys.”

“You’re mean,” Louis frowned.

Liam shrugged, looking completely unapologetic. “Your day your explanation.” He moved to open the supply closet door before turning to look Louis straight in the eye, his expression warm but wary. “I’m happy for you, Lou. Really,” he smiled. “I’m on your side. Harry seems like he might be good for you,” he paused. “Especially if he’s going to get you to work early.”

“King of the backhanded compliment, you are,” Louis said haughtily but he wrapped his arm around Liam’s waist and pulled him into a side hug.

When they opened the door the rest of the band was waiting on the other side, grinning slyly.

“Seven minutes in heaven, boys?” Dan asked with a waggle of his eyebrows.

“Liam wishes,” Louis laughed, “he’s a rubbish kisser.” He moved past Liam to take his place on the practice stage.

“Hey!” Liam frowned. “Soph says I’m a great kisser!”

 


	4. The Light On The Dark Side Of Me Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everyone is quite handy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mature warnings: Unprotected oral sex, fingering, handjobs 
> 
> (Part 2/3 of the original chapter 3. This chapter is a behemoth. Maybe at some point they'll all be put together again for smoother reading.)

Wednesday morning Louis knocked on Harry’s apartment exactly on time. Liam was right, his life had certainly become more punctual since he’d met Harry. Five minutes later, Harry still hadn’t answered the door and Louis was concerned. He tested the handle, found it unlocked, and let himself.

“Babe?” he called “Harry, are you all right?”

Harry didn’t answer and panic crept in. Louis peeked in the living room and dining room before rushing off to Harry’s bedroom. He heard the shower running as soon as he hit the door. That explained it. “Harry,” he called as he approached.

Harry still didn’t seem to notice so Louis walked towards the half open en suite door when the sound of his own name met his ears. Harry was standing in the glass shower stall, facing away from Louis, leaning against the shower wall. He was moaning quite frustratedas he appeared to be attempting to finger himself open.

“Louis-,” he gasped.

“Harry,” Louis answered making the other man turn around. Harry’s face was flush, eyes needy. The scene was something out of Louis’s wet dreams and he was hard so quickly he nearly got a head rush.

“Louis, please,” Harry whined and Louis was there, grabbing Harry’s robe, opening the shower door and helping Harry into his bathrobe before pulling him into his arms.

“You all right, love?” Louis asked.

“Had a dream about you,” Harry nuzzled into Louis’s neck, wet hair dripping everywhere. “Woke up so fucking horny.”

“You should’ve called earlier- I could have come help. Don’t want you to hurt yourself- especially in the shower,” Louis kissed Harry’s forehead. His skin was warm and he smelled like grapefruit body wash and vanilla shampoo.

Harry grabbed Louis’s arm and dragged him to the bedroom, Louis grabbing a towel as they went to wrap around Harry’s hair. He handed the towel to Harry before arranging the throw pillows into a mound near the headboard. “Lay back, yeah?” Louis nipped gently at Harry’s ear. “I’ll help you, love. Gotta be quick- don’t want you late for your appointment.”

Harry rested back against the pillows, hair now neatly tucked into the towel. Louis kissed him hard before trailing kisses down his torso, over his belly, and to his hips. Harry gasped as Louis suckled his tip briefly but didn’t stop at his cock, massaging his thigh with one hand as his other prodded his fingered opening. He hadn’t gotten very far but Louis attempted a press of his tongue anyway. Harry’s body jolted as he moaned loudly. “Please, Louis!” he cried.

Louis quickly snatched the lube off the nightstand and slicked his fingers. He pressed one finger in slowly, sucking marks along Harry’s thigh. He barely got his finger all the way in before Harry was coming, shooting up his belly and moaning Louis’s name.

Louis pressed kisses to Harry’s hips, watching his eyelids flutter. “That better, love?” Louis asked and Harry nodded slowly. “Think you can come again for me?” Harry nodded more fervently and Louis removed his finger only to replace it with his tongue. He alternated between broad licking strokes and inquisitive prods, working to stick his tongue further and further in, placing obscene sounding kisses to Harry’s rim until Harry was a writhing mess. Louis worked his slicked fingers in, feeling for Harry’s spot. Harry came as Louis crooked his fingers up, shaking all over with the intensity of a second orgasm.

Louis stood up and grabbed another towel in the bathroom and a wet washcloth, cleaning Harry gently. “How’s my boy?” Louis asked when he’d finished, kissing Harry’s forehead.

“That was amazing,” Harry giggled as Louis’s soft fringe tickled his face, “you’re amazing.”

Louis shrugged, ducking his head a bit. “Love making you feel good, babe.”

“Felt so so good, Louis,” Harry nodded. “I can lend you a hand- if you want.” He reached for the bulge in Louis’s black jeans.

Louis chuckled and kissed his forehead. “That pun was terrible. Even for you.”

“Hey,” Harry frowned, “I meant it.”

“I know, love, we don’t have time right now-,” Louis started getting up but Harry grabbed his hip.

“You can’t leave like that- you’ll scare my doctor. She’s a lesbian,” Harry unzipped Louis’s pants.

“Well I wouldn’t want to scare your doctor,” Louis conceded, voice going high as Harry wrapped a hand around him. It was an embarrassing three strokes before it was over, Harry catching most of it with his robe.

“That better?” Harry asked, kissing Louis’s nose.

“Much better, thank you,” Louis nodded, sliding the scruff of stubble on Harry’s chin. “Make me feel so good, babe.”

“Good. Now we’re gonna be late and it’s all your fault,” Harry rolled out of bed and pulled his clothes on.

__

Louis wasn’t sure how they managed itbut they were only a whole three minutes late. Maybe it was fate or serendipity or Oprah- but they hit every green light and found parking right in front, which absolutely never happened in LA. It was the foundations of the perfect day.

Harry’s doctor was in a part of town Louis had never been to, not that he had time to explore many parts. It was allnaturopaths, acupuncturists, physical therapists, and other specialists Liam referred to as “woo-woo” doctors. Louis surmised the title came from their practicing of something outside of western medicine. Louis himself hardly ever went to the doctor outside of the occasional footie injury and he hadn’t had one of those in years. He told Harry as much as they entered the elevator of a non-descript beige building and Harry pushed the button for the third floor.

“You don’t go for regular checkups?!” Harry was appalled.

“Should I?” Louis asked.

“I’m going to pretend that’s rhetorical,” Harry scoffed, stepping outas the door opened onto their floor. It was clean and modern bohemian in the office and smelled like citrus but not in the way cleaning products did. This smell was more deliberate.

The receptionists greeted Harry warmly, offering him a choice of beverage (lemon water, kombucha or green tea all of which he declined) and asking him how his new boyfriend was.

“He’s here with me today,” Harry told them excitedly before presenting Louis.

In Louis's mind, the thrill of being introduced as Harry’s boyfriend matched that of standing in front of a crowd of 80,000 people all singing his songs back to him, and despite his many concerts, it was this that had him flustered.

The receptionists smiled at him and then offered him a beverage as well which he also declined. It appeared they were about to ask him a question but a nurse emerged and invited Harry back to the exam room so Louis followed closely behind, reaching to hold Harry’s hand. The nurse led them to a small room that was mostly occupied by an examination table and a counter with a sink. There was a painting of a humpback whale on the wall and a scale model of a uterus.

Harry sat on the exam table so the nurse could take his vitals while Louis took a seat in a squeaky rolling chair beside the table. Harry and the nurse chatted while Louis watched, mind wandering just far enough to wonder what exactly he was doing there. He felt a bit like an outsider. He’d only known Harry for a few weeks while this nurse had been here presumably from the beginning of his pregnancy.

“The doctor will be in momentarily,” the nurse said, packing up the blood pressure monitor. She stepped out and Harry reached for Louis’s hand.

“I’m glad you’re here,” Harry laced their fingers and squeezed.

“Yeah?” Louis asked, wondering if Harry could read his mind.

Harry nodded.  “Damien never wanted to go to these with me. He always said he was too busy- but you’ve been very busy for two days and you’re here.” He brought their clasped hands to his mouth and kissed the back of Louis’s. “Don’t think he understood.”

The timbre of melancholy in Harry’s voice made Louis wanted to rip Damien’s balls off and force-feed them to him.

Louis held Harry’s hand even tighter but before he could reply the doctor knocked.

“Dr. Ruth!” Harry called to her.

“Harry!” she called back. A tall, slender African-American woman with short natural curl kept hair opened the door. She had deep lavender glasses and lipstick to match and last season Louis Vuitton flats.

“Dr. Ruth, this is my boyfriend Louis,” Harry gestured with the hand Louis wasn’t holding. “Louis, this is Dr. Ruth.”

If the doctor recognized Louis she didn’t let on. “It’s nice to meet you, Louis,” she greeted warmly. “Harry seems to be awfully smiley these last two appointments, I suppose that’s owed to you, then?”

Louis flushed bright red as Harry squeezed his hand with a wide toothy smile. “I-uh-,” he managed.

Dr. Ruth laughed, “Didn’t mean to put you on the spot! Sorry about that. How about we take a look, hm?” She grabbed a pair of gloves from a box on the counter.

“Please!” Harry’s toes pointed together as he nestled back into laying on the examination table.

“I’m going to roll your shirt back, all right?” she asked, waiting for Harry to nod before doing so. “Does Louis know you’re pregnant under here?”

“Louis made that same joke last Friday!” Harry laughed as she pressed fingers in what Louis assumed were strategic spots.

“I had no idea!” Louistried to act surprised again but couldn’t keep a straight face.

“Harry was a late shower,” Dr. Ruth told Louis. “Swore up and down he could tell the first week. Had a real cry when the baby bump showed.”

Harry blushed. “It was part pride and part frustration that my favorite jeans no longer fit.”

Louis squeezed Harry’s hand, “That’s adorable.”

“Now I’m on full display,” Harry said happily, running his hand down the side the doctor wasn’t pressing her fingers into.

“Gorgeous,” Louis added and Harry blushed deeper.

“Everything feels good,” Dr. Ruth snapped her gloves off, throwing them away before she reached for a machine Louis hadn’t noticed in the room before.

“You want to hear their heart beat?” she asked.

Harry and Louis both nodded enthusiastically. She set to work, turning the lights out putting on a new pair of gloves and slathering Harry in cold jelly before pressing the sonogram wand to Harry’s tummy.

There was a pause before the baby’s heartbeat came muffled but sure through the machine. Harry squeezed Louis’s hand tighter, eyes searching the monochromatic monitor for any understandable shapes. Louis could clearly distinguish a head shape but not much else. It was a fountain of emotions and Louis was in awe of it all. Harry was carrying a tiny person inside. A person he’d created. Louis stood up and kissed Harry’s temple, “You’re amazing and so is that tiny heartbeat.”

Harry reached for Louis’s other hand to hold as he tried not to cry.

“Still don’t want to know the sex?” Dr. Ruth asked and Louis was pretty sure there was nothing more in this world he wanted to know than the sex of Harry’s baby.

“No, thank you,” Harry shook his head. “I want it to be a surprise- and I don’t need heternormative gender stereotyping to dictate whatever my child wants to be.”

Dr. Ruth chuckled like she’d heard that from him before, more than once. “Yes, yes,” she nodded. “It’ll be a surprise then.”

“You’re sure?” Louis looked confounded.

“Very sure, babe,” Harry kissed the confused expression off his face.

“How ‘bout I print you a photo and get you two on your way? Take your boyfriend out on a proper date,” Dr. Ruth wiped off Harry’s tummy with a damp washcloth and rolled back the machine before removing her second pair of gloves.

“I don’t know about Harry- but this is the best date I’ve ever been on,” Louis said, and he meant it.

__

They left the office twenty minutes later with a Polaroid size photo, which Harry waved excitedly before wrapping his arms around Louis’s neck and pulling him into a hug. He leaned back to give him three quick kisses and one long one before pulling him into a hug again.

“That meant so much to me, Louis, you have no idea,” he nuzzled into Louis’s neck and sighed.

“It meant a lot to me too,” Louis rubbed circles with his thumbs where they rested on Harry’s sides.

“Can we go get vegan ice cream? To celebrate?” Harry asked.

“Course we can,” Louis answered, “What are we celebrating- exactly?”

“Healthy checkup!” Harry smiled.

“The only kind to have, really,” Louis kissed his cheek and opened his car door.

__

Harry had vegan soft serve with extra sprinkles while Louis had vegan mint chip of which Harry also ate half.

Two teenage girls approached the table when they’d nearly finished, asking for photos and autographs from Louis. He obliged happilybutasked them not to post them until tomorrow as he was trying to enjoy a quiet day out. They agreed saying that they were playing hooky from school and if they posted anything about it today they’d get in trouble anyway. They politely ask Harry about the baby and he showed them the photo the doctor had given them. There was five solid minutes of squealing and Louis couldn’t help but be fond.

__

They went to a larger grocery store than Harry’s favorite one because Harry wanted to find a specific variety of cheese to make a three-cheese grilled cheese for Louis. Louis was not going to argue with cheese. Despite the intention of only shopping for dinner they ended up with a cart full of food, which Louis carried out to the car while Harry munched on what he described as “the perfect banana.”

It was a perfect day that ended with a perfect meal, organic low sodium tomato soup and slow cooked grilled cheese. Harry added _these_ little garnishes to the plates that made them extra fancy and more delicious.

“I can’t ever go back to Nandos,” Louis concluded, patting his stomach as they watched a fourth episode of _Bob’s Burgers_.

“Good,” Harry answered firmly, patting Louis’s stomach as well. He moved his hand to his own, rubbing small circles. “This was the perfect day,” he said to no one in particular.

“It was,” Louis agreed, reaching for Harry’s hand to lace their fingers. “Did you want to talk about this morning?” he asked gently.

Harry blushed a bit. “You mean how big a fool I made of myself in the shower?”

“Not exactly that. You weren’t a fool,” Louis looked at him sideways, “I don’t even want to know what that makes me- back when I was doing molly.”

“Molly? The drug or the person?” Harry asked.

“Both,” Louis shrugged. “I don’t remember all their names. Which is shameful. I should remember them. I regret not remembering them.”

Harry leaned towards him. “Were there really that many?” It didn't sound like he was trying to pry- it was just genuine curiosity.

“There were,” Louis nodded, “but there were drugs involved as well so that makes it harder to remember.”

“How did know if you were always safe?” Harry asked.

“Niall kept me in a steady flow of condoms. All my siblings made me pretty scared of having kids before I was ready and although I live like a slob I am terrified of diseases. I still religiously get tested just in case there’s a chance,” he explained.

“So you do have a regular checkup,” Harry cooed.

“Not exactly the glamorous healthy kind,” Louis shook his head. "There were two times I remember slipping up- those were tough weeks waiting for results.” He looked into Harry’s eyes for judgment or wary fear but there was only understanding.

“The second time is when I decided it just wasn’t worth it anymore. Sex with strangers- especially to keep up an image? I wanted it to mean something- I wanted to remember the person's name when we woke up together- if they were there at all to wake up to.”

“Is that why you stayed when I asked?” Harry said.

“That was definitely part of it,” Louis answered, “but a larger part of it was just you. Everything about you,” he cupped Harry’s face. “I sounded like such a creepy stalker-.”

“But you didn’t,” Harry interrupted. “You were just telling me how you felt- feel. How you feel.”

Louis kissed Harry then, expressing everything he couldn’t say with words. It morphed into deep simmering heat as Harry straddled Louis’s lap, biting and sucking at his bottom lip.

“You know-,” Harry pulled away slightly. “You seem to be pretty caught up on the peoples you’ve slept with but-.”

“But what?” Louis asked.

“Well you’ve given me the best oral sex I’ve ever had hands down and I’d thank each and every one of your partners if I could,” he pressed his tongue into Louis’s mouth and it took Louis a moment to catch up, sucking hard on Harry’s tongue before reciprocating.

“You really don’t mind-? All the people?” Louis asked when they broke for air.

Harry shook his head and bit his lip. “Condoms and regular testing? Safe sex talk really gets me going,” he rolled his hips down and Louis smirked.

“HIV test, dental dams, HPV vaccinations,” Louis started listing.

“Don’t,” Harry warned. “I’m gonna get mad horny again and you’re going to have to take care of it.”

“Rubber gloves,” Louis continued.

“That’s a bit kinky,” Harry chuckled.

“I’ll show you kinky,” Louis licked his lips and tickled under Harry’s armpits until he collapsed into the sofa in a fit of laughter.

__

Louis woke up wedged between Harry and the back of the sofa, nearly smothered by the attached back-cushions. They’d fallen asleep somewhere in the second season of the Burger show both shirtless for different reasons but still wearing their pants.His phone was buzzing urgently and insistently and unendingly. He reached for it across Harry, who was butted up against him like the smaller spoon.

It was 8:02 AM.27 missed calls from Liam, 149 text messages and 68 new emails. Louis nearly turned it off but Liam called him just as he held down the button.

“What, Li?” Louis answered as quietly and as angrily as he could manage. “I’m not late! I’ve got an hour and fifty eight minutes at least.”

“Louis,” Liam adopted his managerially tone.

“Fuck,” Louis said and he sat up, disturbing Harry enough to wake him.

“Whaz?” he rubbed at his eyes with the back of his hands and attempted to push Louis back into the sofa with his body weight.

“Check your doorstep,” was all Liam said before he hung up. Louis had given Liam Harry’s address after their supply closet session and consequential heckling for the rest of the day from the rest of the guys.  He figured it would be good considering he hadn’t spent too much time at his own place recently.

“Baby, love,” Louis kissed a sleepy Harry placatingly. “I’ve gotta get up.”

“But no,” Harry whined as Louis stood up on the sofa and hopped over him carefully.

He made his way to the door, unsure what to expect on the other side. Knowing Liam it could be anything from a contract to a live chameleon to a personal trainer. Louis was going to actually kill Liam if it was that last one. But it was none of those things. It was a stack of something with a note on the top that said “call me when you’ve talked to Harry.” He picked them up and brought them into the living room, setting them down on the coffee table as soundlessly as possible. He pulled off the note and fanned the stack of what appeared to be tabloid magazines and a few newspapers. He and Harry were on almost all of them, each headline less creative than the last.

“Love,” Louis peppered Harry’s face with kisses until he stirred. “Harry, you’ve got to wake up.”

“But why?” Harry wouldn’t open his eyes, voice sleep groggy.

“We were papped,” Louis told him quietly. Harry sat straight up at that, looking horrified.

“But when? Was it those teenagers?” His attention went to the magazines on the table. “ _Harry’s Home Wrecking Lover Louis_?” he gasped. “That’s not worth the alliteration!”

Louis wished he’d never looked at his phone as Harry’s expression fell farther and farther the more he read. He sat beside Harry and wrapped an arm around him, kissing his bare shoulder. “None of this is true,” Louis waved a hand over the pile. He picked up the least vile headline and peeled it open to the spread about them.

There was a photo of Harry with his arms around Louis’s neck and one of Louis opening the door for him and three in tiny sequence of them leaving the grocery store, Louis burdened with all of the groceries as Harry snacked on that banana they’d bought. “None from the ice cream shop,” Louis said curiously.

“Did we lose the paps for a blissful hour? Whoopdie-do,” Harry was near tears as he looked at the photo of him and Louis holding hands. “Bloody awful people.”

The article Louis selected from the pile was titled: _Harry Style's New Baby Daddy?_

 

“It looks like model Harry Style's tastes got a little bit more expensive as he upgrades from talk host to mega rock star Louis Tomlinson of No Control. The two were seen leaving a nondescript doctor's office and later grocery shopping. It looks like Styles has more on his mind than casual friendship as the two locked lips in front of the Whole Foods. Is the pregnant model trying to dig in deeper pockets due to financial troubles because of lack of work? Or is he just rebounding after heartbreak? Either way it's no wonder he set his sights on Tomlinson who will take anyone's sloppy seconds.”

Louis felt like his blood was boiling as he read further. He threw the paper on the ground and pulled a now crying Harry into his chest.

“They think I’m using you for your money,” fat tears rolled down Harry'sface.

“They’ve got it all wrong, babe,” Louis said firmly.

“Everyone’s going to think I’m a destitute pregnant hooker and you’re an idiot millionaire I’ve seduced,” Harry buried his face in Louis’s neck and hiccupped a sob.

“I don’t care what idiots like them think, Harry,” he cooed soothingly. “I care what you think of me and what I think of me and that’s it.”

“How can you be so calm about this?” Harry was turning angry.

“They’re just printed words,” Louis dismissed them. “Even if someone did read this they couldn’t possibly believe it.”

“Why not?!” Harry demanded.

“Mega rock star?” Louis quoted the article. “You and I both know that’s certainly not true so do does the rest of the world.”

Harry managed a laugh at that before choking back another cry.

“I do feel silly that I didn’t think about that- the paps finding us. Damn super zoom cameras- you don’t even have to be close anymore,” he tried to joke. “Now everyone will think we’re together.”

“We are together,” Harry leveled a look at Louis.

“That’s convenient then,” Louis kissed Harry’s forehead. “It’s just words on a page. You mean the world to me, Harry.”

“You mean the world to me too,” Harry started crying again.

“Then none of this matters,” he pushed the papers away and kissed all over Harry’s face until Harry stopped crying.

__

After breakfast, Louis tucked Harry into his actual bed and went into the living room to call Liam.

“Louis,” Liam answered on the first ring.

“Liam,” Louis tried to keep the venom from his voice. He was angry, angrier than he let on. He’d had worse things printed about himself but watching Harry cry after being called a gold-digger made Louis’s want to punch everything.

“Harry’s apartment is drowning in paps,” Liam said first.

“Fuck,” Louis growled. “Harry doesn’t bloody deserve this.” He scratched angrily at his head, pacing around the coffee table. “Can you call them off? Can we do anything?!”

“They’re on the sidewalk- so we can’t have them forcibly removed. It’s probably best if he doesn’t leave the house today. I’d say the same for you but you’ve got to be here for IEM fittings.”

“Shit,” Louis threw himself on the sofa. “This is all bull shit.”

“I know,” Liam sounded genuinely empathetic. “I’m sending a car in ten minutes. Leave out the back of the building. We can talk more when you get here.”

Louis hung up and walked back into the bedroom to reluctantly rouse a sleeping Harry. “Babe,” Louis kissed him gently until he woke up.

“Love waking up to kisses,” Harry smiled sleepily.

“Love waking you up with them,” Louis sat beside him on the bed.

“Why are you not in here with me?” Harry asked.

“I’ve got to go to practice,” Louis nuzzled Harry’s nose.

“Right,” Harry yawned. “I remember. Hard worker.”

“That’s right,” Louis laughed softly. “I called Liam. He said there’s paps everywhere outside.”

Harry groaned and pulled the pillow from Louis’s side of the bed over his face. “I thought that was a nightmare or something.”

“Sadly it’s not,” Louis tugged at the pillow, pulling it just far enough to kiss Harry’s hairline. “He said it would be best if we didn’t leave but I’ve got no choice.”

“You can’t go out there on your own,” Harry protested, pushing the pillow away.

“I have to, babe,” Louis cupped Harry’s face as tears prickled at the corner of his eyes. “It’s all right,” Louis kissed the forming tears away. “I’ll come back tonight and we’ll rewatch the episodes we missed when we fell asleep.”

“I’m stuck here then, am I?” Harry frowned.

“You’re not if you don’t want to be,” Louis shook his head, “but I’d appreciate if you didn’t leave unless you had to. Promise I’ll be back as soon as I can.”

Harry nodded a bit, staring at a spot on the wall without really looking at it. “I should probably call my modeling agency anyway.”

“Yeah?” Louis asked.

“I’m on extended contractual break but this PR thing is larger than the last PR thing, might have more repercussions,” he sucked his bottom lip in his mouth, worrying it a dark pink.

“I’m so sorry, babe,” Louis wrapped his arms around him.

“It’s okay,” Harry reciprocated, hugging him tightly.

“Did you want me to pick up dinner on the way back?” Louis stood up to grab his shoes.

Harry shook his head, “No, thank you. Just bring you please.”

“I can do that,” Louis kissed Harry one final time before he set out on his treacherous journey.

__

Louis managed to get to the studio unscathed. Everyone else was already there, sitting with coffee cups an assistant had brought. Niall handed Louis his with an attempted smile and Louis let the calming scent of Yorkshire tea wash over him.

“All right,” Liam rubbed his hands together as Louis took a seat. “Judging by your long faces I assume you’ve all seen the tabloids this morning.” That seemed to break the overlaying tension in the room.

“Fucking ridiculous,” Josh said immediately.

“Liable slander,” Dan spat.

“How’d they even find you guys anyway?” Niall asked. “Did you see them?”

“We didn’t see anyone,” Louis frowned, shaking his head as he thought back. Not even a flashing light he could recall.

“Either way it’s done and we have to deal with it,” Liam told them, they all nodded with varying degrees of irritation.

“We’ve got your back a million percent,” Josh told Louis.

“A million ten,” Dan added.

“Thanks, guys,” Louis smiled at them. He felt slightly less frustrated knowing his band mates were behind him, not that he had doubted them for a second. It was difficult carrying everyone’s careers along with your own.

“Is Harry doing all right?” Josh asked.

“He’s dealing as best he can I think,” Louis’s voice turned soft, “felt bloody awful leaving him trapped like that. But he understood.”

Liam looked at his watch just as his phone rang. “That should be June calling about the IEM’s,” he stepped away from the group and answered the phone.

“I really appreciate you guys giving me yesterday with him,” Louis leaned back in his chair and sipped his tea.

“Guess there’s no point in asking where you went,” Dan frowned.

“True,” Louis laughed humorlessly. “We did get ice cream between.”

“Ooo,” Niall leaned into the conversation. “What kind?”

“Vegan,” Louis told him.

The other three grimaced. “What’s the point in that?” Josh asked.

Louis shrugged and chuckled. “Harry’s very into the healthy and organic.”

Dan shook his head slowly. “That sounds awful. You must really like him.”

Louis threw his head back, laughing deep in his gut. “I do really like him but it’s not all that bad. Certainly feel better.”

They looked disbelieving.

“June’s here,” Liam snapped to get their attention and pointed for the door. Dan and Josh both stood up to open it, jostling each other to get there first.

Louis looked over to Niall who was contemplating him deeply. “Everything all right over there, Nialler?”

“It’s just,” Niall leaned towards him.  “I love you, bro, and this is much easier to be supportive of than that shit you were doing before.”

“Thanks, Nialler,” Louis blinked at him. “I think.”

“I’m just saying-,” Niall leaned back again, “I really like Harry and you and you and Harry. I know you’ve been working on being a better person- and I’ve been really proud of you for that- and Harry makes you like- an even better person.” Niall finished.

Louis pulled Niall into a rough hug, patting his back before holding him for longer than was maybe necessary. Niall just let it happen, hugging Louis back just as hard.

“Should we talk about Zayn now?” Louis asked as they pulled apart.

“I wonder if June is ready for us,” Niall turned to where the technician was unloading her materials.

__  


Harry was snacking on a bag of Barbara’s cheese puffs when Louis got back five hours later. He seemed to be engrossed in a sketchbook, surrounded by swatches, tapping his toes and humming along to Meghan Trainor’s “Dear Future Husband.”

“Hey, babe,” Louis called as he walked into the room.

“Louis!” Harry cried gleefully, hopping up from the sofa. “You’re home!”

Louis’s heart raced in his chest at Harry’s words. “You seem very happy,” Louis wrapped his arms around Harry’s waist as Harry moved in to kiss him.

“I am very happy,” Harry nodded, “I was sad this morning but then I realized that you were right and it didn’t really matter what they said. So I thought I’d look towards the future- and do something I’ve been meaning to do for a while.”

“And it involves- painting?” Louis looked over Harry’s shoulder at the table.

“Mmhm,” Harry nodded, grabbing Louis’s hand and pulling him over towards the sofa. The coffee table was an arrangement of pastel everything, with large furniture catalogues opened and marked with color-coded tabs.

“The nursery,” Louis breathed.

“Yeah,” Harry smiled, wrapping his arm around Louis’s middle as he reached for the sketchbook.

“This is really good,” Louis sounded surprised. “Did you draw this?”

Harry chuckled, “No. Zayn came to visit me today- brought all of this over.” He gestured to the table. “We started talking and he sketched this out.”

“It’s amazing,” Louis said.

“Gender neutral colors,” Harry grinned.

“Keeping the surprise,” Louis nodded.

“Exactly,” Harry kissed his cheek, “gotta get the room done before they get here though.”

“I can help,” Louis offered. Harry raised his eyebrows. “I’m great at handy work.”

“Lou- you really don’t have to,” Harry shook his head.

“But I want to, please, if you’ll let me,” Louis insisted.

__

It was decided that nursery construction would begin the next Saturday morning with Louis inviting Niall along to help him. Louis had never been in Harry’s guest room/office beforebut it seemed out of place from the rest of the apartment. It had a heavily masculine feeland looked overly practical lacking anything fun or whimsical or distinctly Harry. Louis wondered if Damien hadused this room predominantly and if that was whyHarry never really talked about it.

Harry had the crib and changing table rush delivered and the paint cans all set up when Louis and Niall got there.

Clearing the room was easy enough, pushing things into the dining room for Harry to sort through later. There were only two large pieces of furniture which Niall easily dismantled using what he called “Irish ingenuity” which consisted of two beers and three different kinds of screwdrivers that Harry had supplied _._ Harry wondered if it was too early for beer butNiall pointed out that it was after lunchtime in actual Ireland and Harry conceded the point.

They set up drop cloths and painted mostly neatly until Niall got paint in Louis’s hair and Harry had to scold them before they got paint on the uncovered bits of floor.

The paint job was patchy at best, requiring a ridiculous number of coats because Niall and Louis’s attention couldn’t be held long enough.

“You know who’s great at painting,” Harry started, looking directly at Niall.

Niall blushed bright red, pretending he needed to use the bathroom before Harry could finish his sentence.

“What’s going on with those two anyway?” Louis asked as soon as he’d gone.

Harry shrugged, “Zayn won’t tell me much other than they’ve been holding hands a lot.”

“Is that a euphemism for something?” Louis furrowed his brows.

Harry laughed, “I don’t think so. I genuinely think they’ve just been holding hands, poor lads. Zayn might be too scared to try anything.”

“Hm-,” Louis squinted, “and I don’t know that Niall knows to initiate in this situation.”

“Maybe I should invite Zayn over to bring us a pizza for lunch,” Harry smirked.

“Definitely could go for a pizza,” Louis agreed.

“Are we talking about pizza?” Niall nearly ran back into the room.

“Maybe,” Harry said, going to find his phone.

As it turned out, Louis and Niall were not as good at putting things together as they were at taking things apart. They made the mistake of opening both the crib and changing table boxes at the same time and the parts sat littered across the floor as they squabbled over the directions.

“You’re wrong! I’m calling Liam to tell him you’re wrong,” Niall reached for his phone and dialed Liam’s number.

“Don’t bring him into this! That’s so like you. Running to daddy for help,” Louis folded his arms across his chest. Niall stuck his tongue out at him and Harry tried not to laugh from his place in the doorway.

After a brief conversation Liam decided to turn up and show them everything they were doing wrong and in the end he single handedly constructed both pieces of furniture while the other three watched. He’d worked up a sweat, gratefully accepting the water Harry handed him as the doorbell rang.

“Who’s that?” Niall asked warily.

“Must be the pizza,” Harry raised his eyebrows at Louis.

“Great,” Liam exhaled, “I’m starved.”

“I’ll get it!” Niall said excitedly.

“That means you’re paying!” Louis called after him.

“You better’ve ordered pineapple and Canadian bacon then!” Niall yelled back as he opened the door. He was shocked to find Zayn standing on the other side with three pizza boxes in hand.

“Z-zayn!” he managed. “Are you- moonlighting as a pizza delivery man?”

Zayn quirked a smile. “You’ve found me out. My true passion lies in pizza deliveries.”

“Are you going to invite him in?” Harry called. “Pregnant person is hungry.”

“You better bring my boyfriend some food, Nialler,” Louis emerged from the nursery to grab the boxes from Zayn. “Hey, Z.” He winked as he took them into the kitchen.

Harry had in fact requested Canadian bacon and pineapple as well as a cheese and a gluten free vegetarian. Louis chose two slices of cheese for him and two of the vegetarian for Harry. He handed Harry his plate, as he emerged from the nursery just in time to see a flustered Niall grab Zayn’s face and kiss him hard.

Neither Niall nor Zayn explained what was going on as they selected their pizza slices in the kitchen but no one asked. Liam, having missed the exchange, was completely oblivious as he took nearly half the cheese pizza for himself. Fingers now completely greasy, Liam offered Zayn a fist-bump as Harry formally introduced them.

They all sat in the living room with their pizza. Louis was nursing a beer in the farthest corner of the sofa with Harry leaning his back against Louis’s chest. Harry was being sickeningly cute, feeding Louis bites of his pizza, which kept making Niall grimace. Louis wasn’t sure if it was the overly affectionate way Harry was feeding him or the variety of pizza he was being fed that was making Niall pull that face. Either way he wasn’t doing much better, attached to Zayn’s side on the other side of the sofa, leaning his head on Zayn’s shoulder as Zayn rambled stories about his adventure-filled day between bites.

An incredibly sweaty Liam insisted on sitting the floor despite Harry’s repeated offers to get him a chair. It was probably some stoic thing about Harry being pregnant and already seated. Seating arrangements seemed secondary to Liam’s cause anyway as he devoured pizza like he’d not eaten all day. After his third slice he seemed to finally realize Zayn’s and Niall’s proximity to one another. Liam opened his mouth to ask, eyes falling to Louis for explanation.

Louis mouthed the word “later” at him and Liam nodded, letting it go and settling into his fourth slice.

The five of them fit nicely together, home decorating having bonded them in its own special way.

Niall started to tell them the story about the time he and his brother Greg tried to get their mom’s wedding dress on their neighbor’s sheep.

Although he’d heard the story a dozen times at least, Louis was nearly in stitches by the end, Harry grabbing his plate as he almost dropped it.

Liam’s phone rang in the middle of Zayn telling them all about the time he’d worn his sister’s prom dress as a prank. He stood up and adopted his work voice as he stepped out of the room.

“Never a day off for that one,” Louis shook his head sadly.

“We are the ones who invited him over here to help,” Niall said.

“Excuse you,” Louis corrected, “You tattled on me and he invited himself over to fix everything.”

“That’s so like him,” Niall laughed.

“That was Harry’s agency,” Liam announced as he came back in, everyone turning their attention to him. Louis seemed to be the only one surprised that such a thing could happen.

“How’d they get your number?” Louis swallowed thickly around his pizza bite.

“I gave it to them,” Harry said simply and everyone turned to look at him.

“How’d you get it?” Louis tilted his head.

“Zayn gave it to me just in case of emergencies,” Harry explained and Zayn shrugged, biting into his slice of pizza so he didn’t have to comment.

Liam rolled his eyes, “That’s more important to you all than what they called me about?”

“What’d they call you about, Liam?” Niall piped up.

“Thank you for asking, Nialler,” Liam pointed to Niall with his phone. Niall beamed at him as Zayn snaked an arm around his shoulder and pulled him in to kiss the side of his face, which made him duck his head as he blushed. “Harry’s presence has been requested at Tuesday’s Givenchy launch party.”

“It has?” Louis turned to Harry.

“I completely forgot to tell you- that day I called them- they asked me to go to the Givenchy party to show I’m not shying away from the press,” Harry extrapolated, turning a bit to face him. “They wanted to ask if you’d go as well to show you’re not some rebound publicity stunt and I said I’d asked. But the whole conversation upset me so much I called Zayn and he brought the nursery stuff over and- I’m sorry.” Harry frowned deeply.

Louis ran his fingers through Harry’s hair. “It’s all right, curly. That was a particularly exhausting day.”

“It was,” Harry nodded, leaning his head into Louis’s touches.

“I think you two should go,” Liam told them.

“What?” it was Zayn who asked, sounding incredulous.

“Well- I’ve not seen you together for long but it seems to me you’re both fairly committed to this,” Liam gestured between them. “This would be the perfect opportunity to show the press what you’re made of.”

“And what are we made of exactly, Liam?” Louis asked curiously.

“Tougher stuff than them,” Liam smiled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ros and I can be reached at [rosketch](http://rosketch.tumblr.com) and [mybeanieandme](http://mybeanieandme.tumblr.com) for questions comments and concerns.
> 
> This section has one of my favorite lines of dialogue (as does the next section ;D )  
> Thank you so much for reading <3 we hope you enjoyed it.
> 
> -Beanie


	5. The Light On The Dark Side Of Me Part 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Louis has something to tell Harry before he leaves.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mature warnings: Anal Sex*
> 
> Other warnings: Minor violence (a punch is thrown)
> 
> (Finally 3/3 for chapter 3.)

Tuesday, Louis was back at his own place trying to find his suit in his walk in closet. He had four or five really good suits, the ones he wore to award shows. Harry had already seen him in the black one with the ankle pant so he wanted the blue one.

Niall was supposed to be helping but he’d come over flustered and desperately needing a large computer to google something that his “phone screen didn’t do justice to.” So Louis gestured to the office and told him to have at it. He had two computers. A laptop for touring and a desktop at home in his office that was for “business”. They were hardly different since they were connected through the cloud (whatever that was, Louis still wasn’t sure) which made it easy to connect his tabs and searches. The only real difference was the porn he kept on the work desktop, full downloaded films he liked in particular or cute men or- possibly photos of Harry’s underwear ads. Niall had seen his “wank bank” folder, hell, he’d sent Louis some of the links. Louis hadn’t used the desktop in weeks, not since before his second date with Harry.

It wasn't until Niall called his name from down the hallway that he recalled what his most recent search had been.

"Louis," there was a hint of amusement in Niall’s voice.

“Niall,” Louis said tentatively back, knee deep in dirty laundry he’d let pile up at the bottom of his closet.

“Is there something you’ve been not telling me about you and Harry?” he sing-songed back.

“No!” Louis shot back, jumping out of his closet and running towards the office.

He heard the desk chair roll off its mat and onto the wood floor and he saw Niall peek around the doorframe as he turned the corner. Louis couldn’t see his mouth but he could tell from the rise of his cheek he was grinning.

“Don’t!” Louis held out his hands.

“You’ve been googling how to fuck Harry?!” Niall laughed, nearly falling out of the chair.

“So what if I have?! That was- weeks ago- before we started hanging out every day!” Louis flushed brightly, embarrassed by himself from two weeks ago. “Don’t tell-.”

Niall leaned back in the chair and shrugged, pushing the chair back towards the desk. “I’m surprised you guys haven’t already, you two are very affectionate,” he said, folding his hands in his lap. “Won’t it be a bit strange?” he tilted his head, genuinely curious.

“I don’t know,” Louis’s face flushed bright red. Following Niall into the room, he could feel heat radiate in his cheeks. “Maybe- a bit.”

Niall grinned up at him, “Awkward because he’s pregnant with someone else’s kid or awkward because he’s-,” Niall glanced at the computer to get the wording, “in his second trimester.”

Louis sighed and leaned against the desk. “Because he’s in his second trimester,” he rubbed at his temples, “Bloody obviously, which is why I looked it up.”

“Safest way to have sex with someone in their second trimester,” Niall waggled his eyebrows and growled what he thought was seductively, “you know just how to turn a guy on.”

Louis sighed exasperated, rubbing his temples harder. “Because you’re the one I want to turn on, I’m sure.”

Niall extended a hand to scroll through the search results. “Huh,” he said, reading a few summaries to himself. “It really doesn’t weird you out that it’s not your kid?”

“Oh my god,” Louis turned out and headed back for his room.

“What? It’s just a question!” Niall said, rolling the chair after him, using his spindly legs to propel himself forward. His snapback, basketball jersey, and the largeness of the chair made Louis feel like he was talking to a teenager, a really immature teenager who wanted to hear all about his sex life.

“It really doesn’t weird me out,” Louis said honestly, picking up an armful of laundry and putting it in a nearby hamper. A lot of his clothes were at Harry’s now and he’d started taking for granted coming home to freshly laundered sweats and pajamas. “I’ve loved Harry for years and the more time I spend with him the more I see that my feelings weren’t based in some silly aesthetic crush,” he looked up at Niall. “He’s the real deal, Nialler.” He wished he could articulate just what it was about Harry. “He’s just- god- he’s everything.”

Niall smiled softly at him, “you’re so cute when you’re being sappy.”

“Shut up,” Louis nearly slammed the closet door but then thought better of it, “come in here and help me find my fucking suit.”

“Fucking suit?” Niall asked.

“I hate you,” Louis frowned.

__

Two hours later they were at Harry’s place, suit in hand. Louis hadn’t been sure how to style his hair so Zayn had offered to help, saying he was going to the launch party as well.

Zayn oozed elegance as he opened the door to greet them. Louis felt Niall still completely beside him. “Come on in,” Zayn smiled and Niall hesitated at the threshold, a pushy Louis guiding him in.

“You look stellar, Z,” Louis told him as Niall seemed at a lack for words.

“Chu, babes,” Zayn made a kissy face at him and gave him a wink. “Haz’s in the bedroom trying to pick a pair of shoes.”

“Sounds like a difficult decision,” Louis raised his eyebrows recalling the only two pairs of fancier shoes he owned.

Zayn sighed heavily and nodded very seriously as he shut the door.

“I’ll go help him,” Louis said, glancing between Zayn and Niall and back again.

Niall smiled at him slightly before he was off.

Harry was sitting amongst a dozen boxes of different glittery boots in every color you could ever want.

“Hey, curly,” Louis called from the doorway as he gave the door a soft rap.

Harry turned to look at him before standing up. “Louis,” he smiled, walking over to him, meeting him half way. Louis set his garment bag on the bed as Harry wrapped his arms around him.

“You look stunning,” Louis kissed him softly, pulling back to look at Harry’s full outfit, long limbs wrapped in a perfectly tailored black suit. “Shit-.”

“What’s wrong?” Harry’s brows furrowed.

“I’m wearing blue- we’re not going to- clash or something are we?” Louis asked.

“We’re too pretty together to ever clash,” Harry managed to keep a straight face.

“Well that’s what I thought,” Louis nodded solemnly and Harry kissed him again.

“You going to shower so Zayn can do your hair?” Harry leaned his head down to rest on Louis’s shoulder.

“I am,” Louis ran his hands down Harry’s back. “Did you need help with your shoes first?”

Harry pulled away and turned to his shoes, considering them for a moment. “Well- if you’re wearing blue- then I’m going to wear gold I think,” he bent down with much effort and selected the sparkliest gold boots Louis had ever seen.

“Perfect,” Louis nodded, completely clueless as to whether they were or not.

Harry grinned and sat on the bed to slip them on. “Now get in the shower,” he slapped Louis’s bum making Louis squeak. They both laughed as Louis headed for the en suite.

__

After twenty minutes and Harry's collection of shower accoutrement Louis smelled like a fruit basket, wrapped in the softest towels he’d ever felt.

He slipped into his suit, double-checking that his bum still looked as good as he remembered in the pants. It did.

He walked out of the bedroom to find Harry, Zayn, and Niall in the kitchen discussing Niall’s plans for the evening. He’d been roped into a few interviews that evening for various radio shows to promote their new tour.

“Probably best I’m not there,” Niall nodded. His hands were on Zayn’s waist, holding him just close enough, “wouldn’t want to cause a hullabaloo.”

“We’re just too handsome to all be in the same place at once,” Louis added, assuming they were talking about Niall not going to the show.

They all looked at him, Harry’s eyes going wide, expression akin to something close to hunger or- lust? “You’re right, Tommo,” Niall cackled, tucking one of his hands into his back pockets.

“Suit looks good,” Zayn told him. “Don’t you think, Haz?”

Louis did a little twirl and Harry swallowed audibly. “Absolutely,” he said a bit breathlessly.

“Thanks, babe,” Louis grinned at him. “You gonna help me with my hair?” he asked Zayn.

  
Zayn beckoned him with a finger to follow him back into the bathroom.

“Louis cleans up nice,” Niall said to Harry once they’d gone.

“Yeah, I guess,” Harry nodded, eyes still wide. “Fuck did you see his bum in those trousers?” he groaned.

Niall cackled again, nodding. “Not really a bum-man meself,” he shrugged.

Harry giggled. “Well that’s good because Zayn has no bum at all. Bless him.”

Niall laughed, “Guess god ran out of perfection by the time he reached his arse.”

Harry blinked at him but then laughed again. “Zayn is lovely,” Harry nodded.

“And smart,” Niall added, “and wicked funny and a huge bloody dork.” His expression was so fond.

“He is,” Harry agreed, sounded a bit surprised, “I’m-.”

“Yeah?” Niall prompted.

“I’m glad you see that part of him, is all,” Harry said. “People sometimes can’t get past the gorgeous face to see what a great person he is.”

“That’s a shame,” Niall sounded hurt on Zayn’s behalf. “I guess it’s better I met him over the phone,” he said. “Like- sure I googled him after that but- man his stories about Green Lantern-.”

“The super hero?” Harry asked.

“Yeah,” Niall nodded, “he’s like a fountain of comic book knowledge.”

“You’re a keeper,” Harry told Niall.

“I- uh- well thanks, Harry,” Niall blushed, “so are you.”

Harry blushed brightly, “Buh- uh. Thank you?”

“Louis’s crazy about you, I hope you know,” Niall told him hesitantly. “Has been for a while now.”

Harry didn’t know what to say so Niall kept talking. “I don’t mean to- intimidate or pressure you or anything,” he added. “There are times on tour when he’d tell me about your trips to Africa for clean water and say ‘we should find a cause or something like that we believe in that much’ or that time you fell off the stage in Milan- he was going to start a crusade on your behalf to personally destroy anyone who spoke ill of you after that.”

“He- really?” Harry asked, eyes shiny like he might cry.

“Sorry,” Niall said suddenly. “That sounds so creepy- like- he stalked you or something- he just- follows you career. Admires you a lot.”

Harry shook his head, placing his hand on Niall’s shoulder. “It’s all right, Nialler. Thanks for telling me. He’s lucky to have a best friend like you who listens and remembers things.”

Niall exhaled sharply, “He is, isn’t he? Can’t imagine what he’d do without me, honestly.”

“Oi,” Louis’s voice rang down the hallway. “I can feel you talking crap about me.”

“Feel?” Niall called back.

“Yeah, Ni, feel,” he walked into the kitchen and Harry stopped breathing. Zayn had styled Louis’s hair into some sort of swirly delicious treat on the top of his head like a cinnamon roll. A sexy cinnamon roll Harry just wanted to nibble on. “Is this- all right?” he asked as a hush fell on the kitchen.

“Yes,” Harry squeaked, nodding before moving closer towards him. “You look-,” he exhaled, pressing his forehead to Louis’s.

“That bad, huh?” Louis chuckled.

“Absolutely dreadful,” Harry nodded and kissed him hard, placing his hands on his face. Niall gave a wolf whistle and applauded as Louis flipped him the bird, not breaking the kiss.

__

Louis was trying to be stoic in the back of the car as they were driven to he party. Harry was curled tightly into his side worrying his bottom lip with both his teeth and his long slender fingers. Louis reached for Harry’s wrist to kiss the tips of his fingers. “It’ll be all right.”

Harry looked up at him, eyes a bit unfocused after staring at the same spot at the front of the car. He gave Louis a smile and a nod, tilting his head up to brush their lips.

“Do you two have a game plan?” Zayn asked, watching the line of town cars in front of them as they queued for the carpet.

“Hold hands,” Harry said, reaching for Louis’s hand.

“That’s a good start,” Zayn smiled.

“We’re going to ignore the press for the most part- Liam has a few magazines and blogs he said to look out for that were more friendly to my and Harry’srelationship and to talk to them,” Louis explained. 

“We’re going to talk about the tour and how pregnancy leave is treating me,” Harry added.

“Sounds good,” Zayn nodded, “all career stuff.”

“Yep,” Harry nodded.

Their car stopped and door swung open, Zayn stepping out first. Cameras flashed and Louis hesitated before sliding out after him, holding onto Harry like a lifeline.

The press went crazy as soon as Harry’s glittery boot was out of the car. Louis wrapped a protective arm around Harry’s waist. They posed for the cameras as they walked, Zayn staying a careful two steps ahead of them.

Louis recognized the interviewer from the fashion blog that had asked No Control questions at the Grammys. Other than badgering him about his relationship status she’d been amicable enough. He guided Harry gently over to answer a few questions about how rehearsal was going and how excited he was for everyone to see the shows. Harry was politely asked if he was excited for the new Givenchy collection and was highly complimented on his boots. Harry beamed at her, saying he wore them to go with Louis’s outfit.

They were ushered down a bit farther before stopping at another interviewer Liam had Okayed. He stuck strictly to fashion related questions, asking Harry who he was excited to see collections from this fall and who he and Louis were wearing. Harry made Louis turn around to show off the cut of his pants and told everyone the importance of tailoring. Louis only grinned at him, arm taking itsplace around Harry’s waist as soon as he turned back around.

They had juststarted walking away when an insistent interviewer jostled the nice man they’d just finished talking to. “Harry! HARRY!” he yelled and Harry turned. “Do you want to address rumors that you’re living off of Tomlinson’s money?”

Harry felt Louis grip him tighter, pulling him closer as he tried to walk away but the interviewer reached to grab Harry’s arm.

“Is it true your agency released you from contract?!” he yelled, pulling Harry off balance. Harry stumbled forward nearly falling face first into a camera. Louis held him upright, holding him on his feet, and felt Zayn rush to grab Harry, cameras flashing at ridiculous rates to catch the action.

“Louis!” the interviewer persisted, “Is it true Harry seduced you to take your money?” Louis ignored him. “How does it feel to have someone’s sloppy seconds at-?” the ending of the question was cut off when Louis’s fist hit the man’s jaw and knocked him back into the crowd. The flashes became blinding then, with a cacophony of yelling and frantic voices. 

Security shielded Louis, Harry, and Zayn rushing them into the party. Louis was near shaking with fury as Harry clung to his side fighting back tears.

“Fucking hell,” Zayn swore as they were pulled into a private room. “That was fucking ridiculous.” He quieted down as he saw Harry shaking, Louis looking a bit lost as he tried to figure out what to say. Zayn decided to step out of the room to give them a moment.

“I’m so sorry, Harry,” Louis looked dejected and ashamed of himself.

“Sorry?! You’re sorry?!” Harry beat his hands against Louis’s chest before tucking his face into Louis’s neck and sobbing.

“I shouldn’t have hit him, I’m sorry,” Louis placed tentative hands on Harry’s sides.

“I was so scared, Louis,” Harry murmured into his neck and Louis’s heart plummeted to his stomach. He’d scared Harry with his anger and lack of control. He’d turned into his old self.

“Harry-,” he started.

“Thought I was going to fall on the baby,” Harry held him tighter. “I thought I was going to lose the baby.”

Louis’s gripped matched Harry’s for a moment as his heart stopped at that thought. He wished for a fleeting second he could punch the guy all over again. Harry shifted in his grasp, leaning more weight into Louis’s chest, and Louis’s grip loosened so he could reposition his hands to hold Harry better. Harry wasn’t scared of _him_.

“Harry,” Louis exhaled in relief, “I had you, it’s all right, I had you.”

“What if you hadn’t?” Harry shook his head, hands holding the back of Louis’s neck, nervous fingers fiddling idly with the fleeting strands that had escaped Zayn’s generous application of hair product.

“But I did,” Louis reassured gently. “I’ve got you.” His hands wrapped around Harry’s waist and held him close. “I’m not going anywhere.” He rocked them back and forth until Harry stopped sniffling. He looked up at Louis, eyes still shining. Louis offered him a small encouraging smile before kissing the tip of his nose and then his eyelids and then the rest of his face.

Harry started to giggle just as Zayn came back in. He looked relieved to see Harry smiling. “They’ve had that reporter removed from the premises,” he told them.

“He’s not pressing charges?” Louis asked.

Zayn shook his head. “He shouldn’t. And if he does we’ll hit him with a lawsuit far more painful than that punch you landed.”

Louis frowned. “I better freshen up,” Harry said, pulling away from Louis. “I bet I look a mess.”

Louis took in the red-rimmed eyes, blotchy face, and misplaced curls. “You look gorgeous,” he said and he meant it.

“You’re just saying that,” Harry hit him in the chest, playfully this time. “I’m going to the restroom.”

“Did you want me to come with?” Louis asked.

Harry shook his head, “I can manage. Just- don’t leave.”

“I won’t,” Louis told him. “I’ll be right here when you get back.”

Harry exited the room and Zayn let out a low whistle. “Fuck, man.”

“Yeah,” Louis nodded.

“That was an impressive punch,” Zayn commented.

“I really really should not have done that,” Louis shook his head.

“It’s good you did, I was nearly there. You just beat me to it, if I’m honest,” Zayn nodded his head a bit as if to the tune of a song Louis couldn’t hear.

“I was so scared for Harry- and just- furious,” Louis explained.

“Can’t believe he grabbed him like that, the fucker,” Zayn folded his arm across his chest.

“Yeah,” Louis said.

“I’m really glad Harry’s got you, mate,” Zayn fixed Louis with a very serious look.

“I’m glad he’s got you too, Z,” Louis said.

__

Harry came back from the bathroom looking completely refreshed. Louis and Zayn were in a heated debate about Ed Norton’s Hulk vs. Mark Ruffalo’s Hulk. Harry reached for Louis’s arm, hooking his own arm under. Louis beamed at him, completely dropping his side of the argument- that Ruffalo was a welcome softer side of Bruce Banner. Zayn took that to mean that he won, so he followed them out with a smug grin.

The other party-goers didn’t seem to know about the punch or they didn’t care, either way it wasn’t brought up as Harry took Louis around to his different friends introducing Louis as his boyfriend. Louis never got tired of it even after meeting a dozen people whose names he couldn’t possibly remember. There were a few major designers and some former contestants of Project Runway he recognized. Harry seemed to know absolutely everyone and from what Louis could tell, they all adored him. A few leggy supermodels asked permission to touch Harry’s tummy, which he granted, telling them the baby wasn’t really a kicker, but he was hoping soon they would be. They asked potential baby names and mentionednanny agencies Harry just had to look up.

Louis smiled and listened to them talk, happy for his mind to be on anything but the interviewer outside. Harry made sure Louis was close enough to touch at all times, even if it was just their toes or hips brushing. He craved the weight of him and Louis was happy to oblige. After the 26th person, however, Louis decided he might need a drink.

“Harry,” he said close to Harry’s ear over the din of the party.

“Yes, love,” Harry leaned into him and away from Kate Olson of _the_ Olson twins.

“I’m going to get a glass of something- did you want a seltzer or a tea or something,” Louis asked.

“Lemon water?” Harry said.

“Got it,” Louis smiled, “be right back.” He kissed Harry’s ear discreetly, placing his hands on his waist before going off to find the bar.

Louis saw Zayn talking to someone who was possibly more attractive than him. An Adonis of a man who had his hand on the small of Zayn’s back and Louis wondered for a split second if he should be concerned. But then he shook his head. Harry had been cheated on and there was no way in hell he’d be friends with Zayn if Zayn were like that too. Zayn wasn’t a man of many words but the few words he did say meant something and Louis was sure if he asked- Zayn would confirm that the models were all very touchy feely. At least at this party, if Harry’s tummy requests were any indication.

He ordered their drinks and made the trek back to Harry, engaging in small talk with a few people along the way. Comedian Margret Cho told him how much she liked the song “Girl Almighty” and how proud she was of him when he came out as bisexual. Louis nodded and thanked her, feeling incredibly guilty and angry at his agency for misrepresenting him. They didn’t understand what labels meant to other people in the LGBT community. Bisexual invisibility was horrible and now he’d have to come out again and apologize. Louis was hoping by then he’d be able tojustblame it all on his management. That would happen down the road when he and Harry were married.

Whoa. Louis shook the thought away. He and Harry had been boyfriends for barely five minutes and had a lot of things to work out.

Harry was talking to a woman who Louis guessed must be in her mid-sixties but looked as fabulous as ever. She, unlike almost every other woman in the room, was wearing a pair of jeans, which Louis found incredibly odd until she bid Harry farewell and Harry turned to him. He handed Harry his water glass, which complimented Louis’s flute of champagne quite nicely.

“That was Meg Simmons,” Harry was giddy as he took the glass.

“That’s exciting,” Louis grinned. “I’m- I’m sorry, love. I don’t know who that is.”

“She’s a lead designer at Paige jeans!” Harry let the words soak in. Louis had no idea what Paige jeans were. He understood that jeans came in different colors and shouldn’t be worn when dirty (which he did anyway). But then something clicked as he remembered their doctor trip.

“Are Paige jeans your favorite kind?” Louis asked.

“YES!” Harry beamed at him and wrapped him in a hug.

Louis had never been hugged over a pair of jeans but he wasn’t going to argue, giving Harry a peck on the cheek as he pulled away.

“I’ve always wanted to meet her,” Harry explained, standing beside Louis, letting Louis wrap an arm around his back as Harry leaned into him.

“That’s amazing, babe!” Louis cooed. “It’s nice to see you in your element.”

“Mm,” Harry smiled and sipped his water. “Mmmmm,” he took a few more gulps.

“Delicious?” Louis asked.

“Amazing,” Harry nodded; he leaned closer to Louis’s ear, voice quiet so Louis had to lean in further to listen. Damien- whenever we were at these things- he’d never ask me what I wanted- he used to just bring me a cosmo- which was fine until I got pregnant and he never remembered-.” Harry couldn’t count on both hands the number of unconsumed cosmos Damien had brought him. “Never remembered I couldn’t drink.”

Louis’ hold on Harry got tighter, he pressed a kiss to the top of Harry’s head. “Who wants a Cosmo every time you go to a party, anyway?” He tried to lighten the mood.

“Right?” Harry agreed.

“So boring,” Louis continued.

“Thank you!” Harry giggled and Louis’s fingers tickled his side until an important looking distinguished man walked over to start a conversation with Harry and Louis remembered they weren’t alone- in fact they were in a crowded room full of people.

“Harry,” the man smiled and did the double-kiss thing Louis noticed the models were also fond of.

“Louis, this is Stan, creative director for Neiman Marcus,” Harry introduced them.

“Hello,” Louis greeted, holding out his hand.

“You’re- from that band!” Stan shook it enthusiastically. “No- boundaries?”

“No Control,” Louis grinned.

“Yeah!” Stan took a sip of what had to be whiksy. “You guys are great. Your new single- Where Do Broken Hearts Go? Great stuff.”

“Thank you, sir,” Louis preened.

“Can I borrow you boyfriend for a moment?” Stan asked.

“Sure- thing,” Louis nodded. Harry pinched his waist and gave him a slight wave as Stan guided Harry into a conversation that included that woman from Paige jeans.

Louis wasn’t adrift for long. Zayn walked up to him and placed an arm around his shoulder.

“He’s absolutely glowing,” Zayn said.

“He is,” Louis smiled.

“Haven’t seen him this happy in a while. Not even with Damien,” Zayn told him.

Louis ignored how his heart raced. He supposed it was hard to not compare them- him and Damien. Harry hadn’t been in many relationships and that one seemed to matter the most. Especially considering the pregnancy.

“You’re going to have to release a statement soon,” Zayn said, eyes not leaving Harry.

“I know,” Louis nodded. “I know.”

__

Harry was exhausted and his feet hurt at the end of the night, nearly falling asleep on the sofa as soon as he walked in.

“No, no no,” Louis pulled him into the bedroom. “Your feet hurt we don’t need your back to hurt too.” Louis helped him out of his suit and into his pajamas before tucking him into bed, and changing into a pair of slouchy sweats himself.

He sat on Harry’s side of the bed, fishing his feet out from under the covers. Harry muffled a laugh as Louis started rubbing.

“What’re you doing?” he mumbled sleepily.

“You said your feet hurt, so I’m helping,” Louis told him.

Harry’s expression was unreadable in the darkness of the room, the glow of the city the only source of light.

“Hey, Louis?” Harry asked softly.

“Yeah, Harry?” Louis really dug into Harry’s heal making him gasp.

“That reporter wasn’t right, was he?” Harry said in his smallest voice.

“No,” Louis’s hands stilled on Harry’s feet. “They weren’t right when they printed it the first time and they’re not right now.” He started rubbing again. “You’re my first and only choice a million times.”

__

An official statement was released two days later. Their public acknowledgment coupled with Louis’s punching a reporter spread like wild fire. The media seemed set on seeking its revenge on Louis by bringing up every horrible thing he’d ever done and every person he’d ever slept with. The Globe released a six-page expose that “interviewed” mostly women who claimed there was no way that Louis could be gay. It was accompanied by the most unflattering collection of pictures they could muster. Louis throwing up in the middle of the street, Louis leaving a nightclub with two drunken women on his arms, Louis destroying an amplifier on stage, Louis punching a man at a bar- there were grainy photos of him from elevator security cameras.

It wasn’t anything he hadn’t seen before but he wasn’t sure if Harry had. Liam sent them a neat stack of tabloids with a note that once again read “Call me when you’ve talked to Harry.”

Harry rolled out of bed, yawning his way into the living room. “I heard your phone buzz this morning,” he slipped onto the sofa beside Louis, wrapping his arms around his waist as Louis quickly moved to shut The Globe.

“Are those-,” Harry frowned.

“Yes,” Louis nodded.

“Are they saying mean things about us?” Harry didn’t know if he wanted to know really, but at least Louis was here to share the burden.

Louis surprisingly shook his head. “Not us- per say,” he explained. “Mostly me.”

“You?” Harry looked significantly less sleepy.

Louis swallowed and nodded. Harry reached for tabloid and Louis caught his wrist, holding it gently.

“Please-,” his voice broke. He wasn’t even sure what he was going to say. “Please don’t look” “please forgive me” “please know how sorry I am that I love you.”

Harry fixed him with a look- one that said “trust me.”

Louis let his wrist go and Harry offered him a small smile.

“You’ve got impressive reflexes,” Harry offered as he peeled open the pages to find the article on Louis.

Louis watched Harry’s eyes scan the pages. Harry pursed his lips together, sliding them back and forth inquisitively. “These are photos are absolutely horrendous,” he said finally.

Louis winced.

“What was the DPI? 5? Can’t they get higher resolution than a flip phone from 1995?” Harry turned the paper sideways to look at a photo of Louis lying down with his face in a takeout box on a sidewalk with his ass in the air. “This one’s actually all right,” he smiled sweetly at it. “You make this face when you sleep, did you know?”

Louis made a sound that could only be described as a “peep.” Harry glanced over at him, eyebrows raised.

“What?” Harry asked.

“This-,” Louis waved his arms around, “wasn’t- what I was expecting.”

Harry seemed to consider that for a moment, “I’m trying to take a page from your ‘it doesn’t matter book’,” he said simply. “I’m going to laugh at these this time because it hurts my heart what is written in here about you,” Harry’s face slipped into a frown he couldn’t help.

“Most of it’s true,” Louis said quietly, his eyes cast down, frowning deeply.

“I don’t care,” Harry said gripping his chin and tilting his face up. “You told me about this, yeah? I knew you were a bad boy when we started this,” he gave Louis a chaste peck on the lips, regaining his composure. “Pregnancy may have made me flightier but I still know how to google someone. And TRUST me,” he sat back a little, eyes not leaving Louis’s. “Zayn googled you to within an inch of your life. He can tell me all your siblings’ birthdays.”

“What?” Louis was shocked, he shouldn’t have been but he was. He wasn’t sure that he even knew all their birthdays.

“He kept trying to tell me things before you had the chance to tell me them,” Harry continued. “I said as long as you weren’t a murder, rapist, or complete and total dick otherwise- I wanted to get to know you myself.”

“Oh,” Louis’s eyes were wide. “So you- you’ve already seen these,” he was trying to process the fact that Zayn knew everything about him- probably thanks to Niall as well as Google.

Harry nodded slowly and then shrugged,“I mean- not all of them- maybe not these specific ones. But-,” he leaned towards Louis and pecked his lips again. “I know the gist of it.”

“And you’re okay with that?” Louis’s words ghosted over Harry’s lips.

“I’m not okay with the way you behaved- but I’m okay that it’s part of your past and you’ve changed,” Harry kissed him again. “Though I must admit,” he grabbed Louis’s shirt, “you breaking stuff on stage is pretty hot.”

“Oh yeah?” Louis asked as Harry pulled him over and into his lap.

“Yeah,” Harry grinned, “proper rock star stuff. Like you’re feeling the song so deep you just have to release the energy some how.”

“You’ve said it perfectly,” Louis straddled Harry’s legs, kissing him gently, slotting their mouths together. He braced himself on the back of the sofa, fitting himself around Harry’s tummy and kissing him deeper.

Harry’s hands sat on Louis’s hips before tugging inquisitively at Louis’s tank top. Louis sat back on his haunches and raised his arms up so Harry could hoist it off. Harry dropped it to the ground, hands placed on Louis’s chest tracing the smatter of tattoos littered there, his thumbs grazed Louis’s nipples quite purposefully making Louis gasp. And the tone changed.

Louis surged forward to kiss Harry, bracing himself once again on the back of the sofa as Harry’s fingers dug into Louis’s chest. Louis rutted down as he broke the kiss to nip along Harry’s jaw. Harry gasped and moved his hands to hold Louis’s shoulder blades, rocking up into him setting a slow but deliberate pace.

“Louis-,” Harry moaned as Louis started sucking marks down his neck.

Louis stilled his hips and nuzzled in deeper, grazing his teeth up Harry’s neck to the base of his ear making him shudder. “Harry?”

“We could- take this to the bedroom,” Harry suggested, hands gripping Louis’s hair, eyes fluttering shut as Louis sucked a mark where his teeth stopped.

“Sure?” Louis pulled back to read Harry’s expression. His eyes were blown and needy even more so than when he’d found him in the shower the other day.

Harry looked unsure for a second before he nodded, leaning his forehead onto Louis’s. “Want you,” he told him. He gripped Louis’s face in both his hands before dropping them and his gaze. “It’s- it’s just been a while.” He confessed.

“Want you too, babe,” Louis told him. “We’ll take it slow, yeah?” He nodded and Harry nodded against his forehead, eyes still not coming up.

Louis slid off his lap, reaching for Harry’s hands and walking him to the bedroom. 

The sheets still looked slept in, Harry clearly not having bothering with them before he’d gone to find Louis. Louis gathered all the pillows quickly, not unlike whathe’d done before, piling them for Harry to lean against. He wasn’t exactly sure where this was headed but wherever it went he wanted Harry as comfortable as possible.

“Strip? Please?” Harry asked, hands fiddling with the bottom of his tunic.

“Consider it done,” Louis was out of his sweats in a matter of moments. He’d not bothered to put boxers on so there he was on full display, cock half full from Harry bucking up into him. His skin was tanned illustrated stories and Harry wanted to know every one.

Harry pulled his tunic off very slowly, tentatively. Louis drank in all his milky skin as he finally threw it to the floor. Harry crossed his arms over his chest, and he knew it was silly. Louis had seen him naked a few times since the shower- mostly when they were changing in the morning- but that was naked bodies- and this was intimate.

“May I?” Louis asked, approaching him slowly.

Harry gave a hesitant nod and Louis kissed him, he kissed him back down onto the bed, laying him comfortably against some pillows. “Do you know how absolutely gorgeous I think you are?” he asked like the words were sacred.

Harry shook his head.

Louis ignored Harry’s pajama bottoms for the time being, kissing across his chest from tattoo to tattoo, trying to get him to relax. “That first night when you let me rub your shoulders,” he pressed the words into Harry’s skin with gentle nips and sucks, down to his pregnant butterfly, “I wondered what good deed I did in a past life that god would let me see you. Wondered if I’d sold my soul or something to be given time with you.” He kissed down Harry’s swollen belly with so much reverence Harry felt like crying. He reached for one of Louis’s hands, which Louis instantly obliged. “So so lovely,” he kissed along Harry’s hips, squeezing Harry’s fingers before pulling his hand away so he could slip his hands under the elastic and relieve Harry of the rest of his clothes.

Harry lifted his hips and then he was very naked, his hands reaching for Louis’s again. Louis laced their fingers and moved to lie beside him. “Is this all right? Is everything all right?”

Harry nodded, kissing him softly and squeezing his fingers tightly. He was trembling and Louis wasn’t sure if it was from the cold or not. “We can stop,” he told him.

“I don’t want to stop, Louis, I promise,” Harry told him, and he missed how easy it had been grinding on the sofa like horny teenagers.

With clothes on it felt like Harry could take on the world. Clothes were his armor; he knew them inside and out. It was easy to feel like a million dollars in a suit that cost the same. But clothes had betrayed him lately and he felt so out of place. He knew how to be naked without being vulnerable. But it had been a while since he’d had to put on that bravado. And he wanted to be vulnerable for Louis. He wanted to share this with him but he didn’t know how to say it. Didn’t know what to say. Louis was so brazenly honest about everything it was easy to tell him things. But these things he hadn’t even told Zayn.

They started kissing again with no real intention until Harry plucked up the courage to pull Louis’s hair, making him moan.

“God, Harry,” he gasped into his mouth.

“Louis,” Harry answered, biting his bottom lip.

Louis settled back a bit, still holding Harry’s hand. “We could talk it out? Tell me what you like, yeah?” His head was spinning from all the naked Harry below him. “You have a favorite position?” Louis asked breathlessly.

“I do,” Harry nodded, “but- my belly-,” he started, getting flustered, pulling his hand away from Louis’s as he gestured down. Louis kissed him gently, soothingly.

“It’s all right, we’ll get to that later,” Louis smiled and Harry was overwhelmed with implications that Louis would be there for him even after the baby was born.

“What about with- tummy positions?” Louis squinted as he tried to phrase the question. It sounded weird to him but he was more concerned with the face Harry was now making. He was blushing, eyes welling.

“Hazzah,” Louis held Harry’s face. “I’m sorry- I-.”

“I haven’t had sex since I found out I was pregnant,” Harry sounded so small.

Louis’s eyes went wide and he blinked repeatedly in disbelief. “You- what?”

“Damien didn’t want anything to do with me after I found out I was pregnant, at least physically,” the hurt was raw in Harry’s voice. “He kept saying it was for the safety of the baby- but I just think he thought he’d used me up and there was no point.”

Louis’s arms wrapped around him tightly, wishing he could shield Harry from the world and also punch Damien hard enough to break his nose. Harry’s arms found Louis’s waist, holding him as close as he dared.

“Such a wonderful boy,” Louis told him, kissing his hair. “Deserve so much better than him.”

Harry hiccupped a bit as he tried not to cry over Damien again. Louis was warm in his lap, steady breathing and taught muscles holding him closer, so, so comforting around him.

“I don’t even know how to have sex like this,” Harry told him, bottom lip quivering.

An easy grin found its way to Louis’s face and Harry felt it. “What’s that smile?” he asked.

“I- kind of know how,” Louis said softly, not able to bite back his chuckle.

“What? Have you fucked a pregnant person before?” Harry asked, a bit of bite in his voice that neither of them were expecting.

“No,” Louis shook his head easily dismissing the question, “I looked it up.”

“Looked it up? Online?” Harry asked.

Louis nodded.

“Because- you wanted to have sex with me?” Harry perked up slightly.

Louis nodded again.

It was Harry’s turned to surge into a kiss.

Louis hummed into it until it turned absolutely filthy, Harry gunning for more than just a sweet “thank you.”

“Show me?” Harry gasped, eyes full of want.

“There are a few ways,” Louis nipped at Harry’s bottom lip, sliding a soothing tongue over afterwards.

“Oh,” Harry moaned as Louis trailed his biting down to Harry’s neck, pausing to suck on his collarbone.

“We can try the way that sounded the most interesting?” Louis offered, his hands sliding up and down Harry’s sides making him shiver.

Harry nodded enthusiastically, smiling a little.

“All right,” Louis smiled softly, “let me take care of you, babe.”

Harry let Louis position him on his side, the swell of his belly resting on a pillow for comfort. Louis lay behind him, pressing kisses against the back of his neck. He slid his hands down Harry’s back before reaching for the lube on the nightstand, slicking his fingers before spreading Harry’s ass gently and placing a prodding finger at his entrance. Harry moaned, voice thick with need, wiggling back against Louis’s fingers. Louis eased his finger in slowly, working it as Harry’s sounds spurred him on. He was a litany of ‘please, Louis’ and ‘yes’ as Louis added a second finger and really started working his wrist, avoiding Harry’s prostate on purpose until he wasn’t. He crooked his fingers and Harry nearly screamed.

“Need you, Louis,” he turned his head to look at Louis with a flush face and eyes blown.

“Yeah, babe,” Louis nuzzled into him, kissing him wet and filthily. “Condom?”

“Medicine cabinet,” Harry told him and Louis moved like lightning, back at Harry’s side before he could even protest that he’d gone.

He removed the foil and rolled it on carefully, wondering if condoms ever expired and how long those had been in there if Harry was pregnant and hadn’t actually had sex in a while. He lifted Harry’s leg, hoisting it back over his own hip to open him up more before slipping his tip in. Harry’s back arched as he moaned wantonly. “More more more,” he chanted immediately and Louis slid in further, working his hip in experimental thrusts. Louis hadn’t mentally prepared for how tight and hot Harry would be around his aching cock. The sensation eclipsed any of Louis’s day or nighttime fantasies, the feelings alone were enough but the little sounds Harry was making, like Louis was giving him something he’d wanted for so long. A thirst he couldn’t quench with his own fingers.

Louis gripped Harry’s hip, hoisting his leg higher. His other hand snaked between Harry and the mattress to hold him closer before he really started pounding. It wasn’t his best- spooning sex was always sort of awkward and the overall thrusting shallower but the way Harry was moaning you’d never guess.

Louis found the angle he’d wanted thrusting once- twice- before Harry came hard and untouched, hands gripping the sheets. He tightened so suddenly it drove Louis over as well, trying to fuck Harry through his orgasm as he lost it himself.

Harry pulled his leg off of Louis’s hip, curling in on himself as Louis pulled out, tying off the condom and throwing it on the ground. He was sure Harry would give him shit for it later but for now he just needed to hold him.

“Babe?” he asked gently.

“Thank you,” Harry sounded weepy as his face didn’t lift from being tucked in his arms.

“Thank you, Hazzah,” Louis kissed his shoulder, wrapping his arms around Harry, hands sliding past the come on the underside of his belly.

Harry did his best to turn over, which was a slow process but eventually he was facing Louis, kissing him softly as tears rolled down his face.

“Please tell me those are happy tears,” Louis said.

“They are,” Harry nodded, pressing their foreheads together. “That was amazing- and nearly my favorite position.”

“Yeah?” Louis smiled in surprise. “I was worried I’d hurt you- so I held back a bit.”

Harry’s eyes went wide. “It gets better than that?” he asked.

“What’s your favorite position?” Louis asked instead of answering.

Harry rolled his eyes, at who Louis wasn’t sure. “I like it from behind- like- doggy-style,” he told him.

“Mmmm,” Louis nuzzled his face into Harry’s neck. “Fuck that’d be hot. Your face all pressed into a pillow while I grab your hips and pound you from behind.” Louis felt Harry’s face grow hot.

“God- Lou,” Harry choked out. “You can’t just say things like that.”

“Why not?” Louis looked up at him finally.

He was blushing, eyes cast to the side, “Because we still can’t do that for a few more months and now it’s all I’m going to want.”

“It’ll be worth the wait,” Louis promised him.

“You’ll- you-,” Harry couldn’t finish his thought so he kissed Louis instead, hoping that Louis meant what said, meant he was staying.

__

The next few days were busy and rushed with fleeting moments. Louis’s tour was coming together, confirming concert dates and blocking and staging. He came home to Harry every night, wrapping his arms around him and promising to be more attentive the next day.

Sunday rolled around and Louis refused to go in to work. He’d planned to spend all of Saturday with Harry but Liam had called him in and Harry had been so understanding. But Sunday was the day of rest and Louis wanted to spend it resting with Harry. They needed to talk about the following Wednesday when Louis would fly out of the country to start playing shows in Rome. They needed to talk about the future and what everything meant. They needed to be on the same page.

Harry came home from his early morning yoga class for expecting parents with a bag of bagels and a hot tea for Louis.

“I thought we were resting today,” Louis said groggily, gladly accepting the tea Harry gave him.

“We can rest now,” Harry assured him. “My limbs were feeling a bit kinky. It was nice to stretch them.”

“Kinky, eh?” Louis waggled his eyebrows and Harry giggled, leaning into kiss him.

“Louis,” Harry said while their faces were still close, tone too serious for Louis’s liking.

“Yes, Harry?” Louis asked, pecking Harry’s lips once more before sitting up straighter, covers falling low on his hips, giving Harry a momentary distraction as he glanced from Louis’s toned chest to his downy treasure trail.

“Dr. Ruth called me,” Harry said, eyes not looking away from Louis’s navel.

“Is everything all right?” Louis asked calmly. “Strange for a doctor to call on a weekend.”

Harry nodded slowly, “One of the reasons I chose her was because she makes herself available on weekends- I was nervous- first kid and all.”

Louis smiled sweetly, ignoring the tugging in his heart at the word ‘first’, like Harry wanted more kids, like Harry could want more kids with him. He shook his head before kissing Harry’s forehead and reaching a hand to tilt his head up. “Always so conscientious,” he told him and Harry flushed.

“She called to set a date,” Harry said quietly.

“A date?” Louis repeated, pulling back slightly to look at Harry squarely. There was a pause in which Harry worried his bottom lip, eyes staring deeply into Louis’s as if to convey what he meant without using words. “Are you marrying your lesbian doctor, Harry?”

Harry laughed at that, shaking his head, the light tension in the room washed away. “No- a date for delivery,” Harry explained.

“Oh,” Louis said. “OH!” He repeated, getting to his knees and grabbing Harry’s arm with his free hand.

“That’s amazing! When is it?” He relaxed into a seated-kneel, hands fidgeting in anticipation as his back straightened, looking like he might pounce on Harry at any moment in excitement.

Harry frowned, gripping the bag of bagels he still hadn’t set down, the honey cream cheese container inside getting warmer by the second.

Louis’s heart nearly stopped at the expression. Maybe Harry didn’t want him to know, maybe Harry didn’t want him there. Maybe Harry was worried that would also be the day Louis would walk out of his life.

“Or-,” Louis swallowed hard, mouth feeling like it was full of cotton all of a sudden. He wanted to understand Harry’s hesitation but didn’t want to push. This could be the moment Harry finally realized Louis wasn’t worthy of being in his life anymore.

“Louis,” Harry said gently, cutting into Louis’s deteriorating thoughts, “you’re going to be on tour when I have the baby.”

“Just the European section,” Louis told him. “Please tell me the date.”

“But you’re going to be gone,” Harry emphasized. “It doesn’t matter when the date is.”

“It matters to me,” Louis raised his voice slightly, talking over Harry. “I’m sorry,” he said more softly as he continued. “It matters to me,” he repeated, setting his tea on the nightstand before holding out his hand for Harry to take, which he did without hesitation. “I know it’s an impossible huge horrible asshole thing to move tour dates around, but I want to be here, Harry,” he confessed. “I don’t want you to be alone when it happens and I don’t want you to think that when I get on that plane Wednesday and fly to Italy that I’m just going to forget you. Like all of this doesn’t matter. Like all of this doesn’t mean anything to me.” Louis’s voice was choked with emotion, “You mean everything to me, Harry.”

Harry’s eyes were wet with tears as he dropped the bagel bag, moving closer to Louis, curling against his chest. Louis wrapped his arms around him immediately, holding him close and kissing his hair. “I don’t understand,” Harry hiccupped into Louis’s chest. “I don’t understand why you’re still here saying all these things to me.”

“I love you, Harry,” the words were out before Louis could stop them. It didn’t matter. It was the truth. He loved Harry. He had for a very long time and Harry needed to know. “I’m in love with you,” he added, just to be clear this wasn’ta friend-based love, although he was fairly certain Harry understood. He’d gone completely still in Louis’s arms, and his quiet hiccupy sobs had stopped.

Harry lifted his head, eyes red from crying. “June twentieth,” he said.

Louis felt tears pricking behind his eyes. “All right,” he nodded, giving Harry a watery smile. He blinked a few times, tears rolling down his face as he tried to think about where the band would be. “I think that’s right near a weeklong break,” he said. “Maybe we can push the dates forward? Or backward? Or- I don’t know. I can just fly home- rescheduling a show or two won’t be the end of the world- I can be here with you. I’ll be here with you.” Louis rambled.

Harry kissed him hard before hiding his face in Louis’s chest, crying harder. He cried until he felt overheated and had to pull away to cool down, sliding his hands away from Louis and down his tummy. “I- I can’t say it back yet-,” he couldn’t meet Louis’s eyes as he started crying again. As amazing as his time with Louis was, his heartbreak was too fresh, they both knew that.

“It’s all right, Haz,” Louis assured him. “You don’t ever have to.” Louis ran his hands down Harry’s sides, fingers digging in slightly so it didn’t tickle. Harry leaned his forehead just beneath Louis’s collarbone.

“I feel like I will be able to,” Harry told him. “Maybe even someday soon.” His voice was so quiet Louis had to listen closely as Harry spoke the words against his heart. “I want to so badly, Louis.”

Louis moved a hand to stroke his fingers through Harry’s hair, scratching gently at his scalp. “I love you,” Louis stilled his hand, tugging gently at his hair so Harry would meet his gaze. “Unconditionally.”

__

Tuesday evening and Louis still wasn't packed. He and Harry had had lunch with Niall and Zayn who had agreed they were officially dating (although not publically). Harry was beyond excited, going on and on about the double dates they could all go on before Zayn gently reminded Harry that when Louis and Niall returned he would have a baby as well. Louis hadmerely smiled and said "Liam's great with kids. I'm sure he can baby sit for a few hours." Harry had beamed at him and kissed him.

Louis had spoken with Liam about Harry’s due date, which conveniently fell in the middle of the break so Louis would already be free to fly back. He planned on spending any free momentshe had with Harry when he could spare them and he’d already given Harry the list of hotels they’d be staying at complete with room numbers and extensions whereLouis could be reached (with Liam’s and Niall’s numbers as well just in case.)

After a few cookies each Niall and Zayn begged off saying they had things to do before tomorrow. Louis suspected that meant sex but it was fine. He had things to do as well. Actual things. Like packing.

Harry was helping him- sort of. He'd taken to sorting through Louis's clothes finding anything big enough for himto wear himself. He kept a few hoodies andextra cozy socks Louis wasn't sure why he had in the first place. Louis got an absolute thrill seeing Harry trying on his clothes, hugging his arms tightly around himself as he rocked back and forth, giggling.

“Why do you buy your hoodies so large?” Harry asked after taking a third hoodie- this one was Rovers red and fit Harry more snuggly than the other two.

Louis abandoned his duffel to move closer to Harry, heart-skipping beats at the sight of Harry in his favorite color. His hands moved to tug at the drawstrings of the hood smiling as Harry giggled at him. “Big hoodies are nice for the road,” Louis explained, “curl up in one and you can sleep about anywhere.”

“That actually makes perfect-,” Harry started but his phone interrupted him. His brows furrowed adorably. “Sorry- I should-,” he moved away from Louis.

“No worries,” Louis said, moving back to pack again. Zayn and Harry’s agency were the only phone calls Harry ever received and since Zayn was otherwise occupied it must be important- work-important.

“Styles,” Harry answered and Louis could hear an animated voice start talking a mile a minute at him. Harry walked slowly into the bathroom, worrying his bottom lip between his thumb and pointer finger.

Ten minutes later and Louis was zipping up his bag, Harry still occupied. Louis decided to make them cocoa. Then they could curl up in bed or on the sofa and just be boyfriends in the fleeting hours they had left together. 

He brought the steaming mugs into the bedroom just as Harry emerged. He was smiling brightly, happy tears rolling down his cheeks.

“You made cocoa?” Harry asked, grabbing Louis’s face in both hands. Louis parted the cocoa cups so Harry could move closer and let Harry kiss him hard and deep. His lips were salty but so very sweet.

“I did,” Louis breathed as Harry finally broke the kiss. He started to offer Harry a mug but Harry took them both and set them on the nightstand.

“Those- are happy tears?” Louis asked, thinking he was definitely starting to recognize the difference between those and the sad ones.

Harry nodded pulling Louis, whose hands were now free, into his arms and kissing him again. “That was Paige jeans,” Harry’s hands rested on Louis’s waist, thumbs rubbing by his hips. “They want me to be the face of their new maternity line,” his dimples were on full display as his grin stretched across his face.

“Harry that’s AMAZING,” Louis kissed him harder and then hugged him tightly. “I’m so fucking proud of you!”

Harry giggled, “They want to start shooting tomorrow afternoon! And want to document the rest of my pregnancy with the campaign!” He was crying again and Louis kissed at his tears.

“That’s brilliant! It’s going to be brilliant,” Louis peppered kisses all over his face. “That’s my boy. Beautiful, lovely, perfect,” Louis started following the kisses with adjectives until Harry was a blushing mess. “They’re gonna plaster your face on billboards everywhere I go and I’m just gonna miss you more,” he said finally.

“Not as much as I’m going to miss you,” Harry nuzzled into Louis’s neck, breathing in deep the smell of him, the real reason he wanted all of Louis’s clothes, to be wrapped in that comforting scent.

“You’re gonna be so busy you’ll hardly notice I’m not here to scold for leaving dirty briefs everywhere,” Louis tried a joke but Harry shook his head.

“I can’t talk about this,” he said into Louis’s neck. “It hurts too much,” he breathed.

Louis tightened his hold on Harry. “I’m so sorry,” he whispered.

“Tell me again,” Harry said. It was something he’d started asking for on Monday morning and Louis hadn’t understood at first. Harry had hadto explain. But now he knew.

“I love you,” Louis told him. 

“Again,” Harry said softly, closing his eyes, “please.”

“I love you,” Louis told him, kissing both his eyelids.

They stood in a pleasant silence until Harry’s phone buzzed with a text message. It was Zayn congratulating him but Harry ignored it. He could text and call Zayn tomorrow. Right now he wanted to be with Louis.

“Can we have sex, please?” Harry asked.

Louis pulled back, nodding, “Course we can.”

“Don’t know what I’m going to do without you here,” Harry confessed as his hands reached to pull off Louis’s shirt.

“I did worry about that briefly,” Louis raised his arms so Harry could pull his shirt all the way off. “Don’t want a repeat of what happened in the shower.”

Harry scoffed and slapped his now bare chest gently before he realized Louis was being completely serious. “I promise not to try and finger myself in the bathroom,” Harry conceded. “Only on level surfaces where I can lay down.”

“Good,” Louis said, relieved, and he kissed him.

They ended up in the living room trying another position Louis had read about. Harry braced himself against the back of the sofa, knees wide as Louis took him from behind. It was strong precise hip movements, driving Harry crazy and making him moan Louis’s name until he was hoarse. It was a preview of things to come and shear perfection in the heat of the moment as Harry came harder than he’d come in ages, Louis following close behind.

Louis cleaned them up, reheating their forgotten hot chocolates and tucking them both in bed, watching a marathon of something on USA. Harry kissed every part of Louis he could reach, until exhaustion overwhelmed him and he couldn’t keep his eyes open.

“Tell me again,” Harry said as Louis butted up against him, the larger spoon.

“I love you, Harry Styles,” Louis breathed and turned the light out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Please assume whenever they have sex they use protection unless otherwise specified. 
> 
> Sorry this is late everyone.  
> Beanie and AkikoTree (our lovely Beta) had an IRL deadline (as well as editing another fic which posted this morning if you'd like to [read it](http://archiveofourown.org/works/4072360)) and Radadusta had familial obligations. But it is here now. 
> 
> The rest of the chapters are not nearly as long and an epilogue (or three...) is in the works. 
> 
> Thank you for your patience. 
> 
> All the love. x


	6. The More I Get Of You The Stranger It Feels

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Louis's on tour while Harry starts his new job. 
> 
> Zayn becomes Harry's personal courier and Niall makes some decisions about his feelings.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mature warnings: Phone sex
> 
> Other warnings: Alcohol use 
> 
> Also there is Kaylor in this chapter
> 
> Chapter 4 of the original.

Harry arrived at his first meeting at Paige Jeans with aching thighs. He’d woken Louis up extra early with kisses and rode him into the mattress just as the sun peeked over the horizon. It was fast and desperate and hot. Messy kisses and moans as Louis told Harry he loved him until he was hoarse. They were both desperate to imprint on the other so as not to forget in the months that Louis would be away. Harry wanted marks, physical proof, but he had to model- so he gave them to Louis instead, littering his neck and chest with bruises and bites.

The contract they handed him at the meeting was fairly straightforward industry standard stuff, with the added subsection rules stating he couldn't sell any pregnancy pictures to anyone else. Harry supposed that was fine, considering he needed all the confidence he could muster to take his shirt off at this point, and he knew Paige Jeans would definitely be photoshopping out bits, which was weirdly comforting.

As Harry walked to his dressing room, he recalled the pep talk Louis had given him on the way to the airport between gentle reassuring kisses. "No one’s more beautiful than you," Louis had told him with such conviction it made Harry's heart hurt. 

Louis parted with a firm kiss and an "I love you." 

Harry replied with a "tell me again." And Louis smiled and did before turning to his gate.

Harry arrived in his dressing room to four dozen peonies and a note that read "You make me strong xx LT". And Harry felt like he could take on the world.

__

A week in and the marks Harry gave him were faded. Louis’s hands flicked over where they used to be as they did sound check. “Rubbing those spots isn’t gonna make them come back,” Niall told him, his voice more gentle than chastising. Louis pulled his hand away and held his mic stand.

Louis had been trying to suffer in silence but he couldn’t hide it from Niall. It helped that Niall had been in communication with Zayn the entire time so he heard the Harry side of things.

“Why don’t you go back to our dressing room and FaceTime him?” Niall suggested.

“He’s probably busy,” Louis said. “It’s only mid-morning there, he’s probably off to a shoot or something.”

“He didn’t email you his schedule? You’re not having him GPS monitored?” Niall teased.

“Shut up,” Louis shot back with some of his old fire, “you make me sound so creepy.”

“Seriously, please go talk to him,” Josh interjected. “You’re bringing us down, man.”

“FINE,” Louis stormed out, microphone still in hand. He shut the door to his and Niall’s shared room. He pulled Harry’s number up and hit FaceTime.

It rang twice before Harry answered, blinking sleepily. “Louis?” Harry’s voice was sleep rough as Louis beheld the ceiling in Harry’s room. The scene shifted and part of Harry was in screen, his nose and forehead. He was lying on his side, phone propped on a pillow. “Is everything all right?”

“Fuck, did I wake you up?” Louis frowned.

“I should’ve been up ages ago but yoga was cancelled and we’re doing a sunset shoot today,” Harry explained. “Rather talk to you than sleep anyway.” Louis could see the corner of Harry’s sleepy smile peek in the corner of the frame.

“God I miss you,” Louis exhaled.

“Miss you too, babe,” Harry told him, stifling a yawn. “You’ve got to finish the tour so you can come home.”

“Working on it,” Louis huffed out a laugh, ignoring how his longing got worse every time Harry referred to his place as “home”. “The boys are giving me shit. Apparently I’m bringing the mood down.”

“It’s going to be a long few months,” Harry said quietly.

“Yeah,” Louis sighed.

“You’re going to run out of flowers,” Harry told him, sparing a glance to the bouquet that had been delivered yesterday morning to his flat. It appeared Louis had arranged a delivery every day for Harry.

“Hardly,” Louis chuckled. “There are at least a dozen different colored roses. Those all count as different flowers.”

“They all mean different things,” Harry said.

“Do they?” Louis hummed. “Which ones should I be sending you then?”

“Red,” Harry murmured.

“True romantic you are,” Louis smiled.

Harry giggled and pulled the phone closer to himself. Louis wondered if it was a reflex, like pulling someone into a hug. It was frustrating because he could see less of Harry but sweet because Harry wanted him closer, and that was going to be as close as he could get for now at least.

“I should probably go now,” Louis said reluctantly.

“Go on, Mr. Rock Star,” Harry’s voice was sadder than he meant it to sound.

“Love you,” Louis told him.

“Tell me again,” Harry replied automatically, wishing he could answer the way Louis deserved.

__

Harry wasn’t surprised to find roses in his dressing room later that day, but he was surprised by the color. Purple. Well they were predominantly purple with a single red rosebud sitting amongst them, almost eclipsed. 

“Bloom with me xx LT” the card read.

Harry pulled out his phone and googled “purple roses.”

Love at first sight, creativity, openness, and infinite possibilities.

__

Zayn had been planning Harry’s baby shower for months. Coordinating Harry’s friends’ schedules was unsurprisingly difficult, but exceedingly more difficult than he’d originally surmised. There were no more than three of them in town all at the same time, so Zayn had to keep all the supplies on hand for when the stars aligned and he could gather at least five of them.

It happened on a magical Thursday around noon. Karlie flew in with her girlfriend Taylor, Ed was opening for the Rolling Stones in LA that night, and Lily was just about finished with her latest shoot. If Ed could bring Mick Jagger that would make five, and even if that was a snowflake’s chance, it was good enough for Zayn.

He was going to book a massage to get Harry out of the house for an hour and a half. But the mere mention of a massage made Harry melancholic, blubbering about how it wasn’t Louis’s shoulder rubs and nothing could compare to those, so he settled for a mani-pedi at Harry’s favorite nail salon. It wasn’t as much time as he needed, but he would have to make do.

Zayn let himself into Harry’s apartment with the key Harry had given him and went about transforming the place. In the end it wasn’t a baby shower so much as a cocktail party disguised in pastels. The décor Zayn had picked went nicely with Harry’s slow but steady redesign of the apartment.

Lily was the first to arrive. She’d invited Jasmine along with her, apparently insisting she’d needed help carrying the presents. Between them, they held three large boxes wrapped in frog wrapping paper. Zayn helped them in and they immediately set to work making fruity beverages of the alcoholic and non-alcoholic variety. Karlie and Taylor arrived next and were two drinks in when Ed and Mick showed up, dragging Ronnie Wood along with them.

The party was in full swing when Harry finally got home. He cried as they all surrounded him with hugs and congratulations. Harry nearly passed out as he found _the_ Mick Jagger trying to get ice from the freezer in his kitchen.

Ed saved him from himself before he could confess his undying love for the man.

“Harry! The new pillows on the couch look great! Looks like a much better place to crash than the last time I was here,” Ed told him, refilling the virgin strawberry daiquiri he was holding from the second pitcher Lily made.

“Thanks, Ed,” Harry smiled, eyes just barely leaving Mick long enough to glance at him.

“It’s a nice place you’ve got here,” Mick agreed and Harry unsubtly leaned on Ed for support. “Young Edward here was just telling me you and him go way back. Used to kip on each other’s couches when you were poor in the big city.”

“Or other peoples’,” Harry nodded with a laugh as Ed tucked himself into Harry’s side.

“We’ve come a long way,” Ed said proudly.

“What’s it that- that Drake bloke says? Started from the bottom now we’re here?” Mick smiled and exited to refill his drink. It took Ed and Harry a good three minutes to recover.

They all ate cake before Harry opened presents. It turned out Lily’s boxes were a car seat and matching pram. Karlie and Taylor gave Harry a huge bag full of cat-themed baby accoutrements, from cat patterned onseies, to snuggly plush cats, to a cat beanie, and a bib that read “daddy says I’m purrfect.” Ed promised to babysit when he had a free moment- provided he got to crash on Harry’s couch whenever he was in town. And Mick- Mick gave Harry a “Baby on Board” sign for Harry’s car. Zayn watched with great amusement as Harry’s close friends’ thoughtful gifts were eclipsed by this small yellow triangle.

Ed, Mick, and Ronnie had to leave before Harry could give them a tour of the nursery, but he led the girls in all the same. They cooed over the color choices and the bedspread Harry had picked.

“It looks much better in here than it did before,” Jasmine told Harry.

“Thanks, Jazz,” Harry beamed at her.

“The whole place does really, Harry,” Lily added. “So much more vibrant- and so much more you.”

“I felt like I needed a change,” Harry shrugged. “I was a bit worried- especially when Louis first came over- that it was a bit too feminine.”

“Louis?” Taylor leaned in. “Your boyfriend?”

Harry gave her a dimply grin and nodded. “He helped me paint this room actually.” He heard Zayn muffle a snort-laugh behind him. “I wish you all could meet him.”

“He’s on tour?” Jasmine asked.

“Yeah,” Harry’s smile faltered. “But he’s going to be here- when the little one’s born.” He put his hands on his tummy and the girls all squealed in delight. They reconvened in the living room to flip through the books of baby names Zayn had bought for Harry.

__

It was close to one in the morning and No Control’s bus was nearly to Spain. The boys were unwinding, all of them unable to sleep, as the post-show adrenaline wasn’t wearing off.

“NO FUCKING WAY,” Niall yelled in the back of the bus. “NO. FUCKING. WAY.”

Louis and the other lads were in the middle of a heated round of FIFA, but that gave them pause.

“What is in, Nialler?” Louis hopped up from his beanbag chair. He felt creaky and maybe too old for beanbag chairs. Boy was that a scary thought.

“RONNIE FUCKING WOOD,” Niall’s voice seemed stuck on capslock. His phone had died in the middle of the concert and upon plugging it in he found that Zayn had been texting him during what looked like an extra classy baby shower. There were indeed pictures of Ronnie Wood- eating cake and playing the guitar along with the likes of Ed Sheeran and Taylor Swift.

“Are you sure- these aren’t photoshopped?” Josh asked as Niall scrolled past one of Harry and Mick Jagger taking a selfie.

“What the fuck is going on there?” Dan asked.

“Zayn said something about trying to plan Harry’s baby shower,” Niall shrugged. “Looks like he finally got enough people.”

“Baby shower?” Louis’s heart sank. He had been right at the beginning. He had missed it.

“Look at my boyfriend- hugging Ronnie Wood!” Niall cackled.

The other boys blinked at Niall and he turned to see why their infectious enthusiasm had waned.

“Boyfriend?” Josh asked.

“When did Zayn become your boyfriend?” Dan smirked.

Niall’s eyes went wide as he realized what he had said.

“Last I heard you two were just dating,” Louis added.

“I guess- I should talk to him about it,” Niall thought aloud. “He just feels like my boyfriend.”

“You should definitely ask him then,” Dan nodded.

“Aw, yeah, Nialler, get it!” Josh wrapped his arm around Niall’s neck and pulled him into a noogie.

__

Harry picked up on the second ring. “Shouldn’t you be asleep?” was the first thing he asked, no bite in his voice, just a worried concern.

“We’re too hyped after the show,” Louis explained.

“Oh,” Harry said. “I guess that’s understandable.”

“Did you have a good day?” Louis asked, already knowing the answer.

He wasn’t expecting Harry to start crying- was the thing.

“You probably saw the baby shower photos then?” Harry asked, sniffling.

“Niall just showed us,” Louis started. “Please don’t cry, babe. Seems like you had the best time! Your crush was there!”

“He was!” Harry wailed. “But my boyfriend wasn’t.”

“Oh, love,” Louis said softly. “Brussels didn’t keep you company?”

“He did,” Harry told him. “But his arms are too short to hold me.”

“I’m so sorry, babe,” Louis murmured. Harry’s crying seemed to die off, like he just needed Louis to know how much he missed him.

“Do you want to know what Mick Jagger bought for the baby?” Harry asked.

“More than literally anything in the world,” Louis answered.

So Harry went about explaining his gifts.

__

Louis was buzzing after their last show in Madrid, hands shaking and full of fire. He’d kicked an amplifier over, sending it off the stage. The crowd erupted, chanting his name as they played a second encore. He felt like he could run a continent and swim an ocean. He needed to calm down, so he dialed Harry with jittery fingers. It rang through once- twice- and Louis gave up with a frustrated snarl. It was adrenaline and his old-self reemerging.

“We’re going out,” he told Niall as he paced backstage.

“All right,” Niall grinned, putting his arm on Louis’s shoulder.

They ended up at Vanila at a table full of professional footballers drunk off their asses, swapping photos and autographs. Louis was pulled out onto the dance floor by two of their girlfriends but he was too drunk to remember either of their names.

He woke up the next morning with a headache and the taste like dead cat in his mouth. Luckily his surroundings were familiar. He was wrapped up in Niall’s arms in Niall’s hotel room.

Crawling his way to the toilet, he found his dead phone near Niall’s pants and a feather boa he didn’t recognize.

Two glasses of water later and he was in his own room with an expectant Liam sitting on his bed.

“HAVE FUN?” Liam yelled.

“You’re evil,” Louis grumbled, moving to shut the curtains Liam must have opened.

Liam chuckled humorlessly. “What the fuck were you thinking, Louis?” he asked, grabbing Louis’s shoulder as Louis continued to ignore him.

“I was having a goodtime, fuck, Liam. Get off my case, mate,” Louis threw himself at his bed, crawling under the duvet.

Liam hovered over him, folding his arms and tapping his foot impatiently.

“Wait- why are you here?” Louis poked his head out slightly, immediately regretting it as he was nearly murdered by the look on Liam’s face.

“I’m here because your sorry arse was papped to hell and back last night!” Liam threw a morning paper at him. There were unflattering photos of Louis with his arms around many fit footballers and a few of him dancing with girls he definitely did not get the names of.

“Fuck,” Louis groaned.

“Fuck indeed,” Liam nodded.

“Has Harry called?” Louis asked.

“I suspect he hasn’t seen,” Liam shook his head.

“Fuck,” Louis repeated, face planting into his pillow. Today was going to be a long day as he waited for Harry to wake up and for the news to reach him.

No Control’s tour bus was just entering Lisbon when Harry finally called. Louis answered quickly, running to the lounge in the back of the bus.

“Hi, Haz,” Louis greeted tentatively.

“Jesus, Lou,” Harry was huffing on the other end, sounding like he might cry. “Are you all right?”

“Yeah, I’m all right,” Louis started. “I’m sorry about the photos-.”

“Photos?” Harry squawked. “What photos?”

“The- paper?” Louis asked. Maybe the American tabloids hadn’t printed them.

“What about the snaps?!” Harry demanded. “No one wants to wake up to those, Louis!”

Louis covered his face in his hand and wondered if he could smother himself with it. He didn’t remember sending Harry any snapchats.

“A whole five minutes of you drunk crying in a bathroom?!” Harry’s sadness was turning into anger.

Five minutes? Well that explained why his phone was dead, it hadn’t been very alive to begin with when they’d gotten to the club.

“I’m so sorry, Harry,” Louis tried to breathe.

“I know you miss me but fuck, Louis,” Harry said. “Please at least take care of yourself and get back to me in one piece!”

“I’m so, so sorry,” Louis repeated.

He could hear Harry choke back a sob on the other end, “I know I didn’t answer your call, but I was at a film with Zayn. I can’t be expected to just drop everything, Louis.”

“God, Haz,” Louis said, “this isn’t your fault! It’s mine! I should be more mature than to go out and do that kind of shit.”

“Well- yeah,” Harry agreed.

“I was just- fuck- it was a really good show- I wanted to tell you and then I just- took the celebrating too far,” Louis said quietly.

“I’m glad it was a good show,” Harry answered, voice going soft. “I am sorry I had to hear about it in drunk snapchats and not in a phone conversation.”

“Were they really bad?” Louis asked.

“You don’t remember them?” Harry answered then laughed, “no. I don’t imagine you would.”

“I’m sorry for- for anything I said-,” Louis started.

“They were actually very sweet,” Harry didn’t keep him in suspense. “You were complaining about dancing with a girl named Isadora or Isabelle or something you couldn’t quite remember- you just kept saying how you wished it was me.”

“Oh,” Louis exhaled. “Oh.”

“Yeah,” Harry’s tone became lighter. “You kept apologizing for leaving-.”

“Oh,” Louis repeated, swallowing hard. “God, I’m sorry, Harry. No more drinking for me I promise.”

Harry let out a short laugh. “You don’t have to not drink, Louis,” he said softly. “Just drink less, yeah? Take Liam with you, he can chaperone.”

Louis laughed at that, “I guess Niall is a rubbish adult.”

“You do egg each other on,” Harry told him, “Zayn got some pretty explicit things on his phone.”

“Ew,” Louis said.

“He was pretty thrilled with them to be honest,” Louis could hear the smile in Harry’s voice. “I just want you to be careful, please.”

“I will,” Louis promised.

“Is there anyone claiming they slept with you last night?” Harry asked.

“Oh, I’m sure,” Louis nodded even though Harry couldn’t see him. “I’m sorry- for that as well. They’re going to say I’m cheating.”

Harry winced at the word and Louis frowned. “Considering how apologetic you were in the snaps I think we’re okay, in this case at least,” Harry assured him.

“I addressed this in the snaps?” Louis asked.

“Yep,” Harry said. “You were blubbering about how probably one of those girls was going to say they’d slept with you and how it was rubbish because you’d spent the better part of the afternoon imagining rubbing your scruff all down my thighs.”

“Jeez,” Louis blinked. “Did I really?”

“No,” Harry said, “well everything but that last part. I embellished a bit.”

“Oh yeah?” Louis asked.

“Yeah,” Harry’s voice dropped a bit, “You just kept saying you were growing your beard out for me. I just assumed it was to scratch down my thighs.”

Heat pooled suddenly in the lower part of Louis’s belly. “Been thinking about that, have you?” Louis murmured.

“A bit,” Harry confirmed. “Billboard wrote an article a few days ago about how fast your concerts were selling out- they used one of the pictures from your Venice show.”

“First or second night?” Louis asked playfully.

“Second,” Harry huffed.

“Wore that v-neck just for you, babe,” Louis said.

“Bet the marks are gone now,” Harry said sadly.

“Just gonna have to give me more when I come back,” Louis replied.

“I can do that,” Harry assured him. “God, Lou.” He groaned. “Wanna get my mouth on you.”

“Louis, we’re here,” Liam called.

“Liam, I swear to god,” Louis called back.

“Do you have to go-?” Harry asked sounding disappointed.

“Louis William Tomlinson, get out here right this minute or I’ll leak the photo you texted me last night,” Liam said.

“Harry, I love you, I have to go,” Louis hung up.

__

No Control had two days off in London. Really it was 36 hours. Not enough time to fly to LA, but enough time to have dinner with his family and spend the night in his own flat.

It was almost too quiet, but favorable over another night out with Niall. He made a cuppa, looking at the dust collecting on his appliances, wondering if it made sense to sell his place there. It depended on things- other things. Harry related things.

Louis sat on his king sized bed that felt far too big after spending so much time on a bus. He propped open his laptop, clicking skype and calling Harry.

Harry answered after three rings, looking absolutely stunning even on his tiny phone screen.

“Are you wearing makeup?” Louis asked before even saying “hello.”

Harry chuckled, “a bit. Just got back from a shoot.”

“Mascara?” Louis asked.

“Yeah- little foundation, bit of mascara- that one was my choice,” Harry shrugged.

“Looks really good on you, babe,” Louis exhaled.

“Thanks, baby,” Harry smiled sweetly. “How’re things? How’s your flat?”

“Big and empty like my one in LA,” Louis said, leaning his head back on his mountain of pillows. “Don’t know how much longer I’m going to hang onto this place.”

“Yeah?” Harry asked, his tone strange. “You guys tour quite a bit, it’s probably nice to have a place there still,” he cleared his throat, “if I could’ve afforded one before I left England, I’d probably have one as well.”

“You can always stay here- if- you wanted to,” Louis started.

Harry raised his eyebrows, “best keep it then, huh?”

“You have a point,” Louis nodded. His heart raced as Harry’s eyes flicked over the screen, deep and green and gorgeous.

“God you’re so pretty,” Louis breathed, covering his mouth as soon as he said it.

Harry chuckled, looking coquettishly at Louis. “You’re not so bad yourself,” Harry bit his lip, and Louis’s heart raced harder.

“Yeah?” Louis turned his head for a better shot of his jaw. “Beard’s coming in nicely.” He scratched his fingers through it. “Definitely enough to rub all over your thighs, slide it across your bum as I eat you out.”

“Fuck,” Harry exhaled sharply. “Fuck, Louis. It’s so much harder to wank without you.” He sounded exasperated, like he’d tried a hundred times and failed.

“I’m sorry, love,” Louis heard Harry’s breath hitch the way it did when he started touching himself. “Hard to grasp yourself around your tummy?”

“Yeah,” Harry whimpered like he was trying to do just that. “M’hot all over, Lou.”

“Take your clothes off for me, baby,” Louis said, half suggestion half demand. Harry complied easily, holding the phone back a bit so Louis could see his flush chest. “So fucking gorgeous,” he gasped, placing a hand against his cock as his strained in his sweats.

“Wish you could fuck me, Lou,” Harry’s voice was slow, camera shaky as he strained to hold his phone and grip his cock.

“God,” Louis groaned, “you could ride me- like you did the morning I left, fuck into you so hard, baby.”

Harry moaned, eyes closing briefly before startling open, “why aren’t you naked too?” Louis could hear the pout in his voice. He chuckled as he pulled off his clothes.

“That better?” he asked, setting the computer on his thighs so Harry could see part of his cock and most of his torso.

“So much better,” Harry nodded, drinking Louis in. “My phone screen is too small.”

“Laptop?” Louis suggested, gripping himself loosely.

“Tummy’s in the way,” Harry frowned, and Louis chuckled. “S’not funny,” Harry retorted but was giggling along with him.

“Wanna fuck you open with my tongue,” Louis offered instead and Harry started pumping again, watching Louis’s hand start moving up and down his shaft.

“Fuck-,” Harry bit his lip, “Lou-,” he started, “that looks uncomfortable- lick your palm or something.”

Louis laughed but did as he was told, moaning as he got his hand around himself again.

“Better?” Harry asked, voice getting breathier.

“Yeah,” Louis nodded as he stroked a little harder.

“Fuck you’re so hot,” Harry moaned, “and I’m hot.”

“You are,” Louis nodded in agreement, “so fucking hot for me, babe.”

“No-,” Harry shook his head, his hand stilling and his screen tilting back slightly as he set his phone on his tummy. “My body is all hot- stupid hormones.” Louis stopped stroking, watching Harry reach over to where he kept the hair ties. He put his hair up in a tousled bun and Louis hummed approvingly.

“Love your curls like that,” Louis said, smile stretching across his face as he started moving his hand again. “Love running my fingers through you hair.”

“Louis,” Harry moaned, picking up his phone again, watching Louis with rapt attention, fisting his own cock and nestling back again. He stroked with great exertion, hair slipping from its tie. “Fuuuck,” he groaned, setting the phone down to put his hair back. “Stupid hair,” he grumbled, and Louis stopped again, chuckling lightly as Harry struggled to put his hair back with slightly slick hands. “S’not funny,” he pouted as Louis’s chuckle turned into a full chest laugh and Harry had to laugh along because they were ridiculous and it’s hard to have Skype sex when nothing is cooperating.

“I’m so frustrated, Lou,” Harry said finally, and Louis wasn’t sure if that applied just in this instance or to the entire length of his absence.

“I’m gonna hang up and just call you, yeah?” Louis started, “we’ll do good old fashion phone sex and plan for Skype better.”

Harry sighed heavily and frowned. “I wanted it to be good like this, Lou,” he let his hair fall back down to his shoulders.

“Me too, babe,” Louis cooed, “it’s all right though.” He lifted his laptop, placing it on the nightstand and turning on his side. “Why don’t you prop the phone on a pillow and lay on your side? Get a few fingers in you?”

“Mmmm,” Harry moved sluggishly to comply, snatching the lube before turning on his side. “Like this?”

“Just like that, baby,” Louis murmured, although he could see very little of what Harry was doing, just his face and part of his shoulders. “Slick your fingers for me?”

“Yeah,” Harry nodded as he did so. Louis talked him through three fingers, watching Harry’s shoulder strain with every press, face getting more and more flushed, eyes glassy, spurred on with every positive affirmation pouring from Louis’s lips.

“So fucking tight, Haz,” Louis gasped as Harry fucked himself harder with his fingers, other hand working his cock slowly. “Take my cock so well. Gonna take you so hard from behind when I get back, fuck.”

Harry came with a shout, nestling into the pillows, shaking out his arms, limbs feeling pleasantly heavy. “I miss you so much, Lou,” Harry said, instead of the “thank you” he was planning.

“I miss you too, Hazzah,” Louis told him, voice still thick, as he stroked lightly at his angry red cock. He’d voluntarily forgone his own release to focus on Harry’s, and with great success.

“Louis?” Harry started.

“Yeah, Harry?” Louis smiled at him, hand falling away from his cock.

“I- I love you-,” Harry said quietly and Louis came hard and unexpectedly with the most embarrassing sound he’d ever made and Harry giggled at him.

__

Zayn’s Paris photo shoot coincided perfectly with No Control’s tour dates, and Harry was keen on taking advantage.

He was in the full swing of his third trimester and felt like an absolute mess as he gathered things for Zayn to take with him as presents. Things he’d bought for Louis while out and about. Some of it he’d gone out specifically to find and other things had just struck him. A pair of Vans from the Star Wars collection, a Fendi watch, and an ironic band t-shirt were piled among a tube of toothpaste, lint roller, underwear, and a box of 500 Q-Tips.

“I’m sorry, mate, I’m not taking your boyfriend bloody boxer briefs,” Zayn shook his head.

“He might need them!” Harry snapped, hand gripping his lower back. It always hurt lately, constant dull aching.

“Then he can buy them over there,” Zayn informed him, “nice ones too. I know for a fact you’ve modeled nice pants in France, Haz.”

Harry grinned madly at Zayn’s accidental rhyme. “But these are his favorite,” Harry said.

“I don’t care if the pope blessed them. I’m not handing your boyfriend pants,” Zayn shook his head.

“Then give them to your boyfriend to give to my boyfriend,” Harry pouted, lip quivering until Zayn finally gave in.

Zayn finally zipped up his suitcase, half of it was presents. “This is ridiculous.”

“I wish I could go with you,” Harry frowned.

“I wish you could go with me too,” Zayn wrapped an arm around Harry’s waist. It went unmentioned that Harry was supposed to go- before. He’d been contracted over a year ago to model on a sister campaign to the one Zayn had been contracted for. Zayn was the hard edges and sleek-streamline line of boxer briefs: modern, cosmopolitan, chic. Harry was to be the fun floral patterns fitted boxer shorts: youthful, jovial, spring.

But pregnancy.

“I’ll make sure Louis gets all your presents,” Zayn assured him with a kiss to his temple.

“Thanks, Zee,” Harry murmured. “Love you.”

“Love you too, babes,” Zayn hugged him properly, as best he could around Harry’s tummy. “I’m proud of you.”

“For what?” Harry asked, confused frog face making an appearance.

“For opening your heart to love again,” Zayn said. “God that sounded so cliché.”

Harry giggled, “It was sweet.”

“Sure,” Zayn chuckled. “I could still try to fit you in my suitcase, next to the pants.”

“Perfect! We can use that sign that Mick gave me. ‘Baby on board,’” Harry laughed humorlessly.

__

Zayn’s collection of presents was strange, but so very Harry. Louis was handed them unceremoniously before Niall pulled Zayn into his hotel room and slammed the door.

Louis opened FaceTime and waited for Harry to answer. He knew Harry was on set, but hoped he could have a moment wherever he was.

He was outside and it was windy.

“Love!” Harry cooed, a particularly strong burst of wind blowing his hair ethereally like a halo around his head.

“I’ve got your presents,” Louis shouted at the phone.

“Why are you shouting?” Harry shouted back with a laugh.

“Seems loud there,” Louis said in his normal voice.

“What?!” Harry shouted back.

“I said it seems loud there!” Louis shouted.

“I heard you the first time,” Harry chuckled.

“Cheeky,” Louis laughed.

“I miss you,” Harry exhaled as his curls whipped around his face.

“I miss you too,” Louis breathed with him, even as far away as they were.

“I love you,” Harry’s voice was tinny and muffled as he held the phone closer so Louis could hear him over the sound of a crashing wave.

“Tell me again,” Louis grinned.

“I love you,” Harry repeated.

“It still feels unreal to me,” Louis told him.

“Oh, shut up and open your presents,” Harry blushed furiously on the other end.

They weren’t wrapped so much as in the bags they’d been purchased in. Louis was incredibly grateful for everything, particularly the undergarments.

“How did you know these are my favorite?” He grinned madly at the camera phone.

“I’ve only washed your three pairs of those about a hundred times,” Harry rolled his eyes, full-dimple smile already showing.

“I love you,” Louis told him. “And these boxer briefs.” He clucked them tight to his chest before kissing them.

“You’re such a dork,” Harry chuckled, and someone called his name behind him. “Babe, I’ve got to go.”

“Wait-,” Louis called as Harry turned his face.

“Yeah?” Harry asked wistfully.

“Is- there something I can send you in return? With Zayn?” Louis asked.

“Other than yourself?” Harry mused. “A sweatshirt?”

“A sweatshirt? Like from a gift shop? Je T’Heart Paris?” Louis asked.

“No,” Harry shook his head, bashful smile, “One of yours, please.”

“Oh,” Louis said.

“All the ones I have don’t smell like you anymore. Miss how you smell, Lou,” Harry murmured.

“I’ll send you my whole fucking suitcase,” Louis answered.

“Don’t tease me, Lou,” Harry frowned, “I’m trying to be honest.”

“I’m not teasing, love,” Louis shook his head, “Fuck.” He scratched his fingers through his hair, agitation about the situation flaring up. “I’ll send you as many clothes as I can spare, and myself- soon. So very soon, Harry. I just want to hold you.”

“I’d like that-,” Harry started to smile but his attention was called away again. “Fuck, I’ve got to go,” he frowned. “I’m sorry, Lou.”

“Don’t apologize,” Louis shook his head, “thanks for the gifts- I love you.”

“Love you too.” Beep beep beep.

Louis frowned at his phone, eyes suddenly wet. He clutched his presents to his chest, inhaling deeply.

__

Harry put Louis’s hoodie on as soon as it was out of Zayn’s bag; he wrapped his arms around himself and rocked back and forth.

Zayn pulled Harry into a hug, kissing his forehead. “Just two more weeks, babe,” he said soothingly.

“Yeah,” Harry bit back a sob, nodding and pressing his forehead into the crook of Zayn’s neck. “He’s going to come home and I’m going to have a baby.”

“So many exciting things,” Zayn rubbed his hands up and down Harry’s back, tracing faint shapes with his fingers.

“I’m so scared, Zayn,” Harry confessed.

“You’re gonna be a great dad, Haz,” Zayn said, guiding Harry onto his sofa.

“It’s not just that,” Harry shook his head. “What if-,” he shook his head harder.

“What if-?” Zayn encouraged.

“What if the baby comes and Louis decides he doesn’t want to be with me anymore? Decides it’s all too much? Realizes- realizes-,” Harry started talking a mile a minute, getting more and more worked up.

“Harry,” Zayn said firmly to cut off his train of thought, “Gotta stay calm for the baby, love.” He scratched his fingers gently against Harry’s scalp.

Harry took a few deep breaths, leaning into the touch.

“You know I don’t condone ‘what if’ing a situation,” Zayn said. “But I’m not gonna lie- like a lot’s gonna change, Harry.” Harry stilled in his hold. “That being said- I think if Louis was gonna run away he’d have done it by now. Honestly. You were very pregnant when you met him. He entered into this knowing that you’d eventually give birth. And I think-,” he shrugged a little and Harry looked up at him with glossy eyes.

“You think what?” Harry asked softly.

“I think he’s in it for the long haul, Haz, I really do,” Zayn told him. “Wants to make a proper go of it with this kid and more kids and you and a house and stuff.”

“Yeah?” Harry blinked a few tears away.

“I don’t want to speak for him,” Zayn said, “But he really bloody loves you.”

“He does,” Harry smiled, inhaling deeply as he pulled Louis’s hood up and curled into Zayn. “And I love him too.”

__

“Tommo!” Josh wrapped an arm around Louis’s shoulder, pulling him in for a hug.

“Hey, Josh,” Louis furrowed his brows. “What’s up?”

“Just hugging my bro, bro,” Josh grinned.

“Okay-,” Louis chuckled, “weirdo.” He patted Josh’s arm as Josh didn’t let go.

“My girlfriend’s been texting me pictures of our puppy,” Josh said. “We got her just before we came on tour.”

“That’s sick,” Louis smiled as Josh pulled up a few photos on his phone. “She’s a pit bull right?”

Josh nodded, “rescued her. She’s the sweetest thing.” They cooed together over a few more photos.

“Something on your mind, Josh?” Louis asked as Josh lingered beside him, standing just close enough. It seemed like he wanted to talk. Or maybe he had a question.

“Harry’s pregnant,” Josh said like it was a question.

“Yeah,” Louis nodded, unable to help the smile that spread across his face, “ten more days.”

Josh smiled along with him, “you’re excited then?”

“Yes,” Louis nodded. “W-why?” His heart started pounding in his chest like Josh was about to tell him something terrible. Like something with Harry had- he pushed the thoughts away unable to even entertain them.

“Well- we got the dog as a sort of test-run for a baby-,” Josh flipped through his phone pictures. “Not- that they’re like the same or anything…”

“Oh,” Louis felt immediately at ease, it seemed silly for him to jump to conclusions. “You’re nervous.”

“Well, yeah,” Josh nodded, “we haven’t even talked about getting married or anything but she’s pretty sure she wants kids with me.”

“That’s pretty amazing, mate,” Louis said.

“Right?” Josh was grinning again. “I just- like, how do you know you’re ready?” his expression fell, “is that too weird- a question? You sort of- got with Harry knowing babies were in the near future-.”

“I don’t know about ‘knowing when you’re ready’,” Louis told him with a shrug, “I loved Harry long before kids were ever on the horizon for him.”

“Mm,” Josh hummed with a nod.

“I do know that I trust him and I see him in my future- and the excitement everyday outweighs the fear,” Louis continued.

“So you are afraid?” Josh asked.

“I think I’d be stupid not to be,” Louis said frankly. “I’m just going to take everything day by day, and if that’s idiotic then I’m an idiot. But I’m going to stick with love because I believe in it, or what’s the point of all those songs we write?”

Josh laughed outright, head thrown back.

“I mean right?” Louis chuckled.

“You’re right,” Josh nodded. “Oh, speaking of!” He turned and waved Niall and Dan over. “Niall said you’ve been holding out on us.”

“What?!” Louis asked.

“Don’t make that face,” Niall shook his head, “you’ve been writing a song since we left the states.”

“Oh,” Louis blinked, “I’ve been dabbling.”

“Pft,” Dan rolled his eyes, “dabbling. What’s it about then?”

“Something about ‘strong’,” Niall supplied.

“Give me a second,” Louis said and he walked to his bag, fishing out a few crumpled papers he’d jotted notes on.

“My hand, your hand, tied up like two ships-,” Josh read. “Nautical, I like it.”

“Teach us how to play it?” Niall grinned.

“There’s nothing to teach yet!” Louis insisted.

“Fuck off, teach us how,” Niall repeated.

__

Something was off.

Harry could feel it. His baby wasn’t ever really a kicker but on this particular morning his tummy felt particularly calm. He tried to fight the creeping panic. He wasn’t going to be one of those expecting parents calling their doctor at the drop of the hat.

But he’d planned on being one of them. That’s why he’d chosen the doctor he had. She was available 24/7.

Still.

Harry stood up and forced down a piece of toast before waddling outside to take a walk to his favorite grocery and back. The baby was usually fairly active during walks. Or the most active Harry ever felt them.

But by the time he got home with toilet paper, a bag of M&M’s, and Louis’s favorite tea, he still hadn’t felt anything.

He showered, pulled on one of Louis’s hoodies, and called Dr. Ruth.

She told him everything was probably fine but insisted he come in just to check. He thanked her and rang Zayn to come get him.

Zayn was there in ten minutes and they were at the doctor’s in another fifteen.

Harry was barely through the threshold before they were pulling him back into an exam room.

They attached him to a fetal monitor to find the baby’s heart rate below normal. Harry clenched Zayn’s hand hard enough that his fingers went numb.

“What does that mean?” Harry tried to ask as evenly as he could.

“It’s called fetal distress, means your baby’s not getting enough oxygen,” Dr. Ruth made notes on Harry’s chart. “We’re going to get you some oxygen and hook you up to an IV for some fluids and see if we can’t get their heart rate back up.” She moved to the cupboard and drawers, pulling out various equipment that she might need.

Harry swallowed dryly, “What happens if- if that doesn’t help?” His hands were shaking as they fiddled with the elastic strings on the mask she’d placed around his head.

“Then your c-section is moved up to today, Mr. Styles,” Dr. Ruth told him calmly.

__

Two minutes until show time and he was still wearing his glasses. Louis had his contacts case in hand when his pocket started buzzing.

Harry was trying to FaceTime him, which was odd. Harry had to know it was almost show time.

Louis sat in front of his and Niall’s dressing room’s vanity, opening his contact case as he let the call go to voicemail. He slid his glasses off.

He pulled out the right lens as Harry called again. He hesitated, then dropped the lens back in the case and answered the call.

Harry was in tears. “Louis, thank god,” he sobbed. Everything was rushing behind him, sterile white and frantic voices.

“Harry! What’s wrong? Are you all right? Is the baby okay?” Louis asked quickly, shoving his glasses back on his face.

“The baby’s not okay, Lou,” Harry shook his head, “they’re not getting enough oxygen so they’re coming out now.”

“Harry, oh my god,” Louis gasped. “Is Zayn there with you? I’ve-.”

“Louis we’re on stage in sixty seconds!” Dan called.

“I’m coming!” Louis called, hopping up from his seat as his boyfriend sobbed on the other end. “I’ve got the show- baby-,” tears were welling in Louis’s eyes.

“I know,” Harry sobbed, “I know.”

“I’ll be on the next plane out after it’s over,” Louis told him.

“Louis-,” Harry started.

“The next plane,” Louis repeated, “You’re so strong, babe. I can’t wait to see you. I love you.”

“I love you too,” Harry answered before Louis’s phone was removed from his hand and replaced with his earpiece.

His mind was rushing with everything. He needed to get back to Harry. They still had two more shows after this show. But Louis needed to get back to Harry.

“Mate, what’s going on?” Niall asked, guitar around his neck as their intro video started playing.

“Harry’s having the baby tonight!” Louis yelled. “He’s having an emergency c-section and I’m not fucking there.”

His band mates’ eyes went wide. “Are you serious?” Josh asked.

“Yeah, I’m fucking serious,” Louis told him, exasperated.

15 seconds to stage.

“What are we going to do?” Dan asked.

“We?” Louis asked incredulously.

“Yeah- we-,” Josh started.

“We’re going to play the show,” Niall said evenly, “and work it out after.”

They looked at him, and Louis wondered when Niall had become the voice of reason in the chaos of his mind.

“And we’re playing Louis’s new song,” Niall told them.

“We are?” Dan asked.

“We are!” Josh agreed.

“And, Louis,” Niall turned to him as the doors opened and their dry-ice intro rolled out.

“Yeah?” Louis asked.

“You’re going on stage with your glasses on.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A super special thanks to [supernope](http://archiveofourown.org/users/supernope/pseuds/supernope) for beta'ing this chapter <3
> 
> Feel free to visit [Ros](http://rosketch.tumblr.com) and [me](http://mybeanieandme.tumblr.com) on tumblr if you'd like to say hey or complain about- the cliffhanger-ish ending.  
> xx  
> -MyBeanieAndMe


	7. My Power, My Pleasure, My Pain

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Louis arrives in LA and Harry is exhausted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A surprise Monday update. 
> 
> Chapter 5.

Dan had prescription pills for sleeping on planes, which was lucky, because Louis knew for a fact he wouldn’t have been able to sleep any other way in the post-show haze.

Eleven hours in the air and Louis looked sleep rumpled and felt disgusting but everything that mattered was Harry.

It was 4 AM. He called Zayn as soon as he landed, not bothering to make small talk with the driver of the car he’d arranged.

On the phone, Zayn sounded groggy with lack of sleep.

“I’m so sorry, Zayn,” Louis started.

“Usually I’d be angry but under the circumstances,” Zayn said and Louis heard him muffle a yawn. “Can’t believe you actually flew in.”

“How is he? How did it go?” Louis asked quickly, having received only a few short reassuring texts from Zayn before his flight.

“He did beautifully,” Zayn said, “he’s been sleeping off and on, keeps asking about you or the baby when he wakes up.”

“The baby,” Louis’s heart sank. He’d missed it. Well of course he’d missed it. It had been almost a full thirteen hours.

“How are they?” Louis’s voice went soft.

“They-,” Zayn started, “they’re stunning, Lou.”

“Do they have a name?” Louis asked.

“You’re trying to get the sex out of me,” Zayn chuckled.

“I’m nearly there,” Louis told him.

“Harry will tell you their name,” Zayn said.

“I’m at the hospital.”

“I see you,” Zayn said and hung up. He was leaning on a nearby pillar having a cigarette as Louis was handed his duffel before the driver drove off.

His brain rushed with a million things to say about the irony of Zayn outside a hospital with a cigarette and apologies for his state of dress or the way he smelled. But none of that seemed important.

“He’s in room four-one-one,” Zayn blew out forcefully before putting out his cigarette.

“Bet he’s having a field day with puns on that one,” Louis laughed.

“He probably will when he’s less out of it,” Zayn nodded.

“Are you coming up with me?” Louis asked.

Zayn shook his head, “if it’s all the same to you- I’m headed home. I’m tagging you into this round. I need a shower and a few hours sleep.”

“Right,” Louis nodded, “of course. You’ve been- you’ve been here this whole time.”

“S’what best mates are for,” Zayn shrugged.

“I’m so glad you could be here for him,” Louis said.

“Quit talking to me and get up there,” Zayn barked a laugh and Louis was off, duffel in hand.

He had to ask three separate nurses for directions to Harry’s room, flustered and jittery with excitement. A few people pointed and stared at him as he walked too fast through corridors. He didn’t have time to stop for photos and autographs right now.

The door stood before him like a portal to Narnia or the platform to Hogwarts. He was so excited to get here he’d forgotten to be worried but now standing here. He felt like throwing up.

“Did you need help, sir?” a passing nurse asked. Her eyes went wide as she recognized him, swiftly training her features into a professional demeanor.

“I’m nervous,” Louis told her. “My boyfriend is in there and the baby and I want to see them but I’m nervous.”

“You’ve got fifteen minutes until rounds,” she told him. “I’d go in there quick before Jessica’s supposed to check on Mr. Styles. She doesn’t like visitors this early.”

“Thanks for the tip,” Louis nodded gratefully.

“Good luck,” the nurse waved and continued on her way.

Louis opened the door and set his bag down, the eerie glow of early morning hours dappling the room with a purple light. A lamp was on in the far corner of the room illuminating the four bouquets Louis had ordered on the plane to be delivered to the hospital along with flowers he didn’t recognize as well as stuffed animals and balloons.

Harry’s bed was in the opposite corner, lit by a small frog shaped nightlight he remembered Liam buying for him once the nursery was complete.

Louis started tip-toeing towards him when his attention was drawn away by fussing in a hospital bassinet just beside Harry’s bed.

Louis’s heart stopped as he redirected his path towards the sound. It was barely three extra feet but it felt like a mile, Louis’s heart rabbiting and his hands shaking as he peered into the plastic bin.

There they were, pink rumpled face framed between a mint knit cap and swallow-print swaddling blanket. The light in the room was awful but Louis was sure he’d never seen a more perfect baby. They made another sound, small arms struggling for escape as they protested the confines of their new world.

Louis scooped them up, holding them close. “Welcome to the world, little one,” Louis cooed so softly it was barely a whisper.  “You’ve got to let your daddy sleep.” They blinked their eyes open at him but seemed to accept this new state, calming down as Louis gently rocked back and forth.

The baby closed their eyes once again and Louis moved to put them back but he couldn’t. He didn’t want to let go.

“L-lou?” Harry croaked and Louis turned around.

Greasy disheveled curls brushed back, skin sallow with dark circles around his eyes, Harry looked more tired Louis had ever seen him. He looked-.

“Marry me,” Louis blurted out as Harry opened his mouth to speak.

Even on heavy medication that made Harry sit up a little straighter in his reclined bed. His eyes blinked quickly as they tried to take everything in.

“Am I dreaming?” Harry asked slowly.

“You’re not dreaming,” Louis shook his head, carrying the baby over and sitting on the edge of Harry’s bed as close to Harry as he could.

“Are you- crying?” Harry’s hand came up to touch Louis’s face, IV drip tube and heart rate monitor following along.

Louis hadn’t noticed but he was in fact.  “Marry me,” Louis repeated as Harry’s thumb traced a tear to the corner of Louis’s eye.

“Lou-,” Harry started, but it was then that theforewarned Jessica entered the room. She wasn’t as abrasive as Louis was expecting, working mostly in silence as she changed Harry’s IV and adjusted the monitor, jotting notes on Harry’s chart before leaving the room.

Louis felt like he was going to die in those five minutes as Harry sat quietly. He could feel his arm getting sweaty under the weight of the newborn in his arms but he only held them tighter, protectively.

Harry started crying once Jessica shut the door.

“Harry- I-,” Louis started.

“I’ve just had a baby,” Harry sobbed, his heart rate monitor noting an increase. “And you’re here and you’re holding her and I look awful and I’m on medication and you’re here asking me to marry you.” Tears rolled down his face, falling onto his hospital gown.

“Her,” Louis exhaled, staring at the baby in his arms. “God, Harry, she’s beautiful.”

“Thank you,” Harry cried and Louis wrapped his free arm around him. The position was difficult and Harry winced and Louis panicked over the fact that Harry was in recovery with stitches and he should be more mindful of that fact especially with Harry’s baby in his arms.

Harry leaned into Louis’s touch as much as he could without straining. They sat quietly just watching as the baby’s face wrinkled with still unused expressions that meant nothing but Louis found them all perfect.

“Does she have a name?” Louis asked softly.

“I was thinking- Esther,” Harry told him, just as quietly. “It means star.”

“Esther,” Louis repeated, “it’s perfect. Perfect name for a perfect baby.”

“And if she hates it- or decides she was always a boy- she can help pick a new one,” Harry concluded.

Louis’s heart bubbled over with joy as even a medicated-Harry was still so very Harry.

Harry nuzzled into Louis’s shoulder, arms making their way lazily around him. “I can’t believe you’re here,” he told him.

“I wish I could’ve been here sooner,” Louis said, “I’m so sorry I wasn’t.”

“You’re here now,” Harry said and Louis kissed the top of his head.

“I smell awful- and I look disgusting,” Louis rambled.

“You’re perfect,” Harry told him.

“I love you,” Louis said, voice shaky as his emotions welled up again.

“I love you too,” Harry said, blinking sleepily at Louis. He tilted his head, pecking a kiss on Louis’s lips. “And yes.”

“Yes?” Louis’s brows furrowed.

“Yes, I will marry you,” Harry whispered it like a secret against Louis’s lips.

“Yeah?” Louis closed his eyes, afraid to open them, like it all might disappear.

“Hard to say ‘no’ to the love of your life when he’s holding a baby in his arms,” Harry murmured.

“Your baby,” Louis’s eyes opened, only to crinkle almost entirely shut as he smiled so broadly his face might break.

“First of our many,” Harry kissed at the eye-crinkles as Louis’s expression turned into shock. He buried his face in Harry’s neck as everything all became so overwhelming. Harry pulled him down to lay beside him on the bed, little Esther nestled between them.

Everything Louis had ever dreamed of was coming true and it was better than he could have ever hoped.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The last chapter will update in two days! Thank you everyone for reading <3


	8. I've Been Kissed By A Rose

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harry and Louis tell their friends their news.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: Incorrect understandings of Beyonce lyrics.

Louis had to go back to Paris before Harry left the hospital. He had to go back later that afternoon in fact.

He missed that evening’s concert before it was even lunchtime in LA. Guilt gnawed at his stomach but holding little Esther helped.

Liam had tried to get him back sooner, begging him to be on “the next flight” whenever he’d missed the last one.

“Louis, you’re killing me. Harry is lovely and I’m happy for you but please, one more concert and then you’ve got a week and a half,” Liam insisted.

“Did you see how cute her button nose is?” Louis answered into the phone, cooing at the newborn in his arms.

“She’s very cute,” Liam agreed.

“Harry brought the little nightlight you and Soph gave him to the hospital,” Louis said giving Harry a little wink.

“Don’t change the-,” Liam started before sounding baffled and a bit honored. “He did?”

“He did,” Louis nodded even though Liam couldn’t see him. Harry smiled at him.

“I’m touched-,” Liam said, emotion heavy in voice before he seemed to catch himself and clear his throat. “You have to come back.”

“Liam,” Louis whined.

“Louis William Tomlinson, you owe it to your fans,” Liam persisted.

“Liam,” Louis groaned, startling Esther. She made a face like she might cry and Harry frowned at Louis from his spot on the other end of the bed. “I’m sorry,” Louis said gently, handing her back and walking out of the room. “It’s hard to leave them,” Louis told him.

“I understand that, Louis,” Liam said as patiently as he could. “But I swear to you- I’ll book your return ticket home for tomorrow right after the show if that’s what you want. I just need you here. It’s not fair to the fans, Lou.”

“I know, Liam,” Louis nodded again although Liam still couldn’t see him. “What’s the- last one I can catch and get there in time?”

“It leaves in three hours, I’m booking it now,” Liam said, voice sounding lighter.

“So I’ve got- a little bit of time?” Louis asked.

“The tiniest bit,” Liam answered.

“Give the lads my love and apologize again,” Louis said.

“We’re all on your side, Lou,” Liam assured him. “We’re so proud.”

“Thanks,” Louis smiled broadly and hung up.

“Everything all right?” Harry asked, Esther held tightly in his arms. She was sucking dutifully on a bottle of something Louis guessed was formula.

“Yeah,” Louis nodded, “I’m sorry about my outburst before-.”

Harry shrugged and smiled a little, “she was going to get fussy soon anyway. Turns out she was hungry.”

“Understandably so. Being cute all the time is exhausting. Really works up an appetite,” Louis said sitting down on the bed again.

“You’d know from personal experience, then?” Harry raised an eyebrow.

“Aw, shucks, you think I’m cute, curly?” Louis grinned.

“Insufferable,” Harry smiled and shook his head. He winced as a chuckle ran through him, stitches still aching a bit.

“Are you alright, love?” Louis asked, standing up to move closer, kissing Harry on the forehead.

“Fine- just-,” Harry nodded his head towards his stomach.

“Do you want me to feed her? I heard the doctor say something about not holding heavy things for too long,” Louis held out his arms.

“You just want to hold her again,” Harry said softly, “I think you’ve held her longer than I have.”

“You held her for nine months,” Louis retorted, “and-,” his voice got quieter, “I’ve got to leave in an hour or so.”

“Oh,” Harry frowned, “One last show?”

“Yeah,” Louis ran his fingers through Harry’s hair, “then I’ll be back here to take care of you and little Esther.”

Harry leaned into the touch, closing his eyes. “I’d like that very much, Lou.”

“I’m glad,” Louis leaned in and kissed his forehead again. “I’m crazy in love with you, Harry Styles.”

“Uh-oh-uh-oh, bananas,” Harry answered.

Louis blinked rapidly, tilting his head as he looked at Harry. “Were you trying to quote Beyonce just now?”

“Excuse you, trying? I succeeded,” Harry said.

Louis barked a laugh, startling Esther again but she kept chugging away, “oh, Haz. No no.”

“What’s no no?” Harry asked.

“The line- uh-oh-uh-oh oh no no,” Louis sang.

“No!” Harry shook his head.

“Yes,” Louis laughed. “It’s not bananas.”

“I’ve been singing it wrong for years,” Harry sounded appalled.

“It’s all right, babe, I think most people do,” Louis chuckled and leaned in to kiss him properly.  It was a longer kiss, just sweet enough and full of promise. I love you and I’m coming back.

Louis’s phone buzzed telling him he had to go get in LA traffic to go to the airport. He sighed heavily.

“You’ll be back soon,” Harry told him, setting Esther’s empty bottle down and lifting her higher in his arms.

“As soon as I can,” Louis said. He moved towards his duffel. He hadn’t packed much but figured he should probably change his clothes so he wasn’t appearingat the airport again in less than 24 hours in the same grubby clothes he’d come over in. He stepped into the bathroom, changing quickly. A plastic bag fell out as he shoved his dirtier clothes back in. He’d completely forgotten the present he’d bought Harry and Esther at the airport in Paris.

“Haz,” Louis said, stepping out of the bathroom.

“Lou,” Harry answered.

“I bought you and Essy something,” Louis moved back towards them and Harry preened at the nickname his daughter had just been given. The first of many he was sure.

Louis pulled the stuffed animal out and presented it to Harry.

“A bear,” Harry’s eyes went watery, “Je T’Heart Paris.”

“It goes with Essy’s collection,” Louis smiled, getting choked up as Harry reached for the bear, having it plant small kisses on Esther’s face.

“Can’t believe you remembered,” tears were flowing free from Harry’s eyes now.

“Course I did,” Louis’s phone went off again. “Babe- I gotta go.”

“Of course,” Harry nodded as Louis kissed him.

“Will you be okay?” Louis asked.

“This certainly makes it more- bear-able,” Harry grinned.

“You’re terrible,” Louis groaned, “why do I love you.”

__

While Louis’s arrival to LA had gone largely unnoticed, his exit did not.

The sudden cancellation of that night’s concert had alerted the media that Louis was no longer in Paris, or even Europe in general, which caused the rumor mills to start churning on overtime.

Coming off the stories of cheating in Madrid, gossip rags were ablaze with stories of Harry and his alleged pregnant fit. Rumor had it he landed himself in the hospital and Louis had flown in to smooth things over. There were dozens of paps waiting just before airport security for an exhausted looking Louis, yelling questions at him about Harry.

He clutched his duffel tighter, holding onto the memory of Essy in his arms and Harry’s soft fleeting kisses as he and his security pushed through to their flight.

He arrived at Charles De Gaulle to even more paparazzi, looking even more tired but smiling all the way through it as he’d turned his phone back on to a photo text from Harry of him and Esther captioned “we miss our lou-lou”.

__

“So what happened?” Niall pulled Louis into a fierce hug as soon as he was back at the bus. Dan and Josh appeared from nowhere with Liam on their heels.

“I went to the hospital and Harry had had the baby and yeah-,” Louis was smiling broadly again unable to help himself. He glanced at the other guys and flushed a bit.

“Aaaand?” Niall insisted.

“I sort of- proposed,” Louis shrugged.

“Proposed?!” Josh and Liam were both flabbergasted for different reasons. Liam looked just about at the end of his rope, torn between fainting and punching something.

“Yeah,” Louis nodded meekly.

“What did he say?” Dan asked.

“Well he said ‘yes’,” Niall retorted with a laugh before checking with Louis, “he did say ‘yes’ right?”

“Mm-hm,” Louis nodded and they all crowded around him in a hug.

“You’re the first people I’ve told,” Louis followed up. “Harry was going to tell Zayn today- or yesterday- or whatever day it is.”

“Did you get down on one knee? Did you give him a ring?” Josh asked.

Louis shook his head, “I just sort of- shouted at him after I picked up Esther.”

“Esther? The baby,” Josh smiled.

“Yeah,” Louis was grinning right along.

“Alright, now that we’ve caught up-,” Liam cleared his throat, “I really need to speak to Louis and then we need to go to sound check.”

There was a collective groan. “I know, I know, I’m a dickhead for doing my job,” Liam rolled his eyes.

The other three busied themselves as Louis was pulled all the way into the lounge in the back.

“Proposed?” Liam started with.

“Yes,” Louis nodded, not bothering with his usual snark. Liam had been incredibly lenient- even letting him leave. “I don’t owe you any explanation- but I love him.”

Liam furrowed his brows before pulling Louis into a tight hug, patting him on the back three times before pulling away.

“Liam- are you crying?” Louis asked.

“I’m bloody proud of you, mate,” Liam answered, pulling him back into a hug, holding him for longer this time.

“Aw, Liam-,” Louis started.

“You have no idea how worried I am about you,” Liam said over him, “all the bloody time.” He sniffled a bit before pulling back and patting Louis on the shoulder.

“I’m- sorry?” Louis said.

“You should be,” Liam laughed and Louis punched him in the arm.

“We’re going to have to announce your engagement to the media at some point- but I don’t want to worry about that right now. I think that break should be break. We’ll fly you lot home- let the press say whatever they want- and when you come back for the rest of the tour- you can say it on stage,” Liam suggested.

Louis blinked a few times. “Who are you and what have you done with Liam Payne?”

“Oh shut it, Lou,” Liam rolled his eyes. “Does that sound alright?”

“It sounds perfect,” Louis said.

“Speaking of sounding perfect,” Liam pulled out his phone, “your song has gone viral.”

“My song?” Louis furrowed his brows as Liam pulled up a shaky YouTube video titled “No Control Concert New Song ‘Stronger’”. Louis watched himself dedicate the song to a very special person in his life and watched as he and the boys worked their way through it. It certainly sounded better than it had at practice.

“They love it, Lou,” Liam beamed at him.

“Fuck me,” Louis sighed. “They do?”

“Haven’t you checked Twitter? Hashtag-Stronger4Larry was trending after the first verse,” Liam opened his Twitter feed to show the few tweets from yesterday and the night before.

“They’re- rooting for us?” Louis clarified.

“It appears so,” Liam said.  “Some of them at least- most of them.”

“I’ve got to get Harry a ring,” Louis murmured as his mind rushed with every tweet Liam scrolled past.

“Hmmm,” Liam squinted his eyes in thought. “I could maybe squeeze in a bit of shopping time- if you get to sound check right now.”

“Done,” Louis ran off, grabbing the other lads as he went.

__

Esther was sound asleep when Zayn walked in with the largest Jamba Juice on the menu. It was peanut butter and banana and by far Harry’s favorite. He accepted it greedily, taking a huge gulp before even greeting the other man.

“Thank you, Zee,” Harry smiled at him as Zayn gently nudged a chair closer to sit beside Harry’s bed.

“No problem,” Zayn smiled. “You look happier than when I left this morning- how’s Louis?”

“Good. Tired. Probably in the air as we speak,” Harry shrugged and took another sip of his smoothie, savoring the cold liquid as it went down his throat. His medication and hormones had him all over the place temperature-wise.

“I didn’t realize he had to go back so soon,” Zayn said sipping from his Starbucks cup. “Did he go back for the last show?”

Harry nodded and smiled again.

“What aren’t you telling me?” Zayn raised an eyebrow and cocked his head.

“He proposed!” Harry held his hands up, still holding his smoothie.

“HE WHAT?!” Zayn sputtered, standing up and sitting on the edge of Harry’s bed as if sitting closer to Harry would help him believe the news.

“He proposed,” Harry repeated, smiling around his straw.

“Haz,” Zayn grinned, “That’s amazing.”

“I know,” Harry was giddy. “He was in here this morning- just holding Esther and just- I must have looked awful- and he just- he proposed.”

“I’m sure you were beautiful,” Zayn wiped a thumb under Harry’s eye and smiled gently. “Just like you always are.”

“I love you,” Harry gave him a watery smile.

“Love you too, babe,” Zayn kissed his forehead.

“I want a shower and my own bed,” Harry frowned as Zayn moved back into his own chair.

“Two more days,” Zayn said. “It’s probably best you don’t leave now anyway.”

“Why’s that?” Harry made the froggiest of his frog faces.

“Paparazzi are swarming the place,” Zayn said into his coffee.

“Why’s that?” Harry looked perplexed.

“Those must be some strong painkillers,” Zayn said.

“Don’t be like that, Zayn, please, I’m in no state- Louis,” Harry realized.

“The public doesn’t know your due date,” Zayn nodded. “They think you’re in a tizzy over Louis cheating in Madrid and had to be hospitalized.”

“But he didn’t,” Harry frowned.

“You know that and I know that but they don’t know that,” Zayn shook his head. He pulled out his cell and opened YouTube. “Plus he wrote you this song- it’s got people pretty convinced he’s trying to win you back.”

He pushed play and watched Harry dissolve into tears as Louis sang his heart out. “But I don’t care- I’m not scared of love-,” the music blared, slightly tinny through the phone speakers, disrupting Esther from her little nap. Harry merely picked her up, holding her close. “That’s our Louis, Essy,” he told her.

__

Louis felt nearly back to form as they waited to take the stage again. His hair was properly done, he was showered, and most importantly he had his contacts in this time. His hands fiddled nervously at his sides brushing past the ring he’d found earlier at a French antique store. Liam had managed to wrangle him half an hour, which he knew wasn’t enough time to find the perfect ring. But Niall, of all people, suggested what turned out to be the perfect place and Louis was determined to not let his perfect engagement ring out of his sight until it was on Harry’s finger.

“Are we doing Louis’s song again?” Dan asked, putting one of his earpieces in.

“Actually-,” Louis started.

“We can’t keep making last minute set list changes,” Josh frowned. 

“Remember back- when we first got together- and we played that wedding up in Liverpool?” Louis asked.

They all squinted before Josh spoke up. “That wedding that was way too posh for Liverpool?”

“That’s the one!” Louis pointed at him.

Dan and Niall groaned. “That’s too sappy even for you!” Dan shook his head.

“Seriously, mate, we’re a rock band- sometimes a bit alt rock but that’s a bit of a stretch,” Niall added.

“Then we’ll make it rock,” Louis pleaded.

“Fine,” Dan sighed. “You’re going to owe us huge.”

“Anything you want,” Louis nodded.

“You’re going to regret that later,” Niall leaned in to tell Louis as the doors opened for them and the dry ice rolled out.

“I know I am,” Louis replied.

They took the stage like the rock stars they were starting right into “Midnight Memories.” The crowd was on their feet screaming the words back at them, applauding wildly and destroying their throats as the song played out.

“And now- Tommo would like to bring the mood down early in the show,” Niall said into his standing microphone as he adjusted a string on his guitar. “He’d also like to apologize to a few people- wouldn’t you?”

“I would,” Louis said into his microphone, fiddling with a few keys. “First, I’d like to apologize to the fans for canceling yesterday’s concert. I had a good reason I promise you- you’ll get to know very soon-.”

“Oooo,” Josh said from his drum set and the crowd echoed his sentiment.

“I know- very cryptic- I’m sorry,” Louis continued.

“Who else do you need to apologize to?” Niall insisted.

“You guys? And our manager Liam?” Louis said.

“And-?” Niall pointed at the scaffolding.

“Oh- the lighting technicians and folks who do the special effects for the show- we’re going off the set list again,” Louis smirked into his microphone and the crowd went crazy chanting “Stronger.”

“Next show,” Louis promised as Dan and Josh started singing the “ba-ya-ya’s.”

Niall strummed in on the guitar, bringing up the tempo.

“There used to be a grey tower alone on the sea-,” Louis sang and Niall came in to harmonize on the next line. “You became the light on the dark side of me.”

_Love remains the drug that’s the high and not the pill._

_But did you know that when it snows my eyes become larger,_

_The light that you shine can be seen._

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Surprise (to me as well). It actually updated today. AkikoTree got the edits done so here it is <3
> 
> Thank you everyone for reading the story! It absolutely means the world to me that you took the time.
> 
> Ros and I started talking over the possibilities of this story in short texts and I never thought it'd ever be this long or have this many comments or kudos or bookmarks. 
> 
> You're all lovely sweethearts and you make me smile. 
> 
> If you'd like you can visit [Ros](http://rosketch.tumblr.com) and [me](http://mybeanieandme.tumblr.com) over on tumblr. Ask us canons or epilogue questions if you like :'3 
> 
> All the love.
> 
> -MyBeanieAndMe


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